Steele Sends Nancy Pelosi to the Back of the Bus
WASHINGTON DC (GlossyNews) — Chairman Steele invited Republicans to “Get on the Bus” on Friday. The RNC Chairman Michael Steele has, with his Fire Nancy Pelosi Bus Tour, removed the House Speaker from under the bus to sitting inside his…
Actor Gary Coleman Finally Buried In Brief Ceremony
HOLLYWOOD (GlossyNews) — Citing a lack of sufficient funds for a proper burial, the ex-wife of actor Gary Coleman sold photos of the little guy’s casket to three tabloid magazines for about $500.00 in order to send him off right!…
Pelosi Debunks “Free Healthcare for Pets” by Affirming It
Botox Village, CA (GlossyNews) — On the campaign trail with Norbert B. Snortwhistle. Speaking to a group of her firmest supporters, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi vowed Democrats will introduce sweeping legislation guaranteeing free health care for all pets. While this…
Preacher Terry Jones to Replace Geraldo as World’s Hugest DongGobbler
Not since Geraldo Rivera stood outside Al Capone’s vault, has there been a TV moment with a bigger chance of bombing than Terry Jones’ Quran burning tonight, September 11, 2010. Terry Jones, the firebrand preacher of a Pentecostal Offshoot Church…
Chevy Recalls 150,000 vehicles for Nocturnal Emissions Problem
Detroit, MI – GlossyNews.com – A worldwide recall for Corvette and Hummer vehicles has been officially announced, ending weeks of speculation by industry insiders and automotive experts. The recall addresses certain models that have been plagued, as Chairman Delany Forbes…
Folk Singer Succumbs to Irrelevance
Song stylist and political activist Adam Cohen has died, sources close to the family told Glossy News today. Cohen passed peacefully at his Greenwich Village apartment, after a long battle with colorectal cancer and raging irrelevance. Cohen is best known…
Feds Net Price-Fixing Bee Keepers In Killer Sting
Stinger’s End, NJ – GlossyNews.comFederal authorities have netted over 300 bee keepers in a carefully crafted sting operation that was hatched nationwide in the past three-weeks. Yellow jacketed agents swarmed in and arrested several key people late last night in…
FOX News Blasts Obama for Failure to Stop Qur’an Roast
In perhaps their greatest show of partisan hackery, the pundit collective of FOX News this morning went on offensive against President Obama for his failure to use military force in stopping the radical Christian church in Florida from burning sacred…
KKK Reps Surface to File Anti-Anti-Hate Lawsuit
Tuscaloosa, AL – Glossy News – In what legal scholars are calling a possibly precedent changing landmark case, the KKK this week launched a challenge against organizations that “think they can out-hate [their] white agenda,” according to a brief filed…
Scholar Claims Bacon and Marlowe Works Written by Shakespeare
In a recent controversial paper for The Journal of Cultural History and Aesthetic Identity, historian Leonard Zelig claims that the works of late sixteenth century cultural giants Christopher Marlowe and Francis Bacon were actually written by a contemporary, a playwright…