A new study by the Millennial Institute of Advanced Research on 2150 newborn babies in Minnesota has found a significant increase in IQ scores of babies forced to listen to old ABBA songs at least two hours a day.

“This is a surprising result,” notes chief scientist Riley Ruster, “as ABBA tunes were actually tested on the babies by mistake. We intended to test Bach on them but the research assistant misread our specification of `Bach’ for `ABBA.’ By this serendipitous route we have achieved a remarkable breakthrough.” Continue Reading

Christina Aguilera has had enough of the criticism for her flubbing the Star-Spangled Banner during this year’s Super Bowl. She claims that only a handful of Americans actually know all the words to the ‘incredibly difficult and outdated’ song and because of that, she wants to lead a fight to change the song to one that is more singer-friendly. Continue Reading

Pete Townsend, guitarist extraordinaire for The Who, wasn’t the first artist to destroy a musical instrument on stage. Jerry Lee Lewis is said to have destroyed a few pianos by setting fire to them, Jimi Hendrix destroyed a few guitars in his short time on this earth. And other big names, including Keith Moon, band mate of Townsend, got a kick out of blowing up his drum sets. Continue Reading

What would have happened if Simon Cowell, the inspiration and chief executioner for the wildly popular American Idol show had been around to judge the big stars of American music before they became legends.

Just how many of them would have survived the gauntlet of his withering criticism? I think many would have curled up under his sarcasm like slugs deluged by salt and withered away. Continue Reading

After 4 multi-platinum records, 6 platinum records, three gold records, and a string of four consecutive records that achieved no real status due to high amounts of sucking, John Mellencamp is ending his 20 years marriage, citing “it’s none of your business why.”

Mrs Mellencamp, who is described by her publicist as “a model”, and by everyone else as “a former model”, has yet to comment on the reasons for the separation, but anyone familiar with celebrity have a few good ideas. Continue Reading

According to documents filed by Roc Nation, the Jay-Z owned record label of Willow Smith, the hip-hop tween isn’t an artist, which is something anyone who has heard her music would agree. So what is the daughter of Will Smith?

The documents show that Roc Nation entered into agreement with Spooky Girl, Inc. to record the young Miss Smith. Spooky Girl only has one client, Willow, and it only has one owner, a former recording artist by the name of – wait for it – Will Smith. Continue Reading

Anyone familiar with Kelly Osbourne knows she has an uncommon love for all things chemical, specifically if they can get her to an altered state, and as a member of the first family of rock, she’s never faced an ounce of consequence for her penchant to imbibe. Has Kelly Osbourne been arrested for DUI? Continue Reading

NEW YORK, NY – There are collectors and then there are collectors — those who transcend the bounds of baubles and nostalgia to dabble in the truly unusual. Some people are content to save stamps or coins. Others express their happiness with vintage record albums or memorabilia. But in the homes of fringe collectors, all of these objects are replaced by rarities such as shrunken heads, embalmed limbs of circus freaks, found art, and toilets. Among these collectors of the unusual, New York based rocker Lady Gaga stands out.

Upon entering her fashionable mid-town New York flat, one is struck with the decorating skills that make the home’s entrance comfortable and engaging — that is until one gains the living room, where along all three walls stand 22 fully working urinals, illuminated by hidden lights. Most are strikingly well preserved. Others evoke cringes to rival those seen in the public WCs at the Port Authority. Continue Reading

Not to impune the comedic gold that is the phenomena of the impractical uselessness of the boomerang, nor the clever brilliance of Clarke & Dawe, but Tim Minchin (Wikipedia or TimMinchin.com) is as funny as anyone you’ll see, as musically brilliant as you could ever hope to find, and more entertaining than anyone you’ll never see in the United States. Continue Reading

Song stylist and political activist Adam Cohen has died, sources close to the family told Glossy News today. Cohen passed peacefully at his Greenwich Village apartment, after a long battle with colorectal cancer and raging irrelevance.

Cohen is best known for his seminal work with Adam, Eve & Cain. As member of that groundbreaking trio, Adam penned such unforgettable classics as “Leaving on a big Boat” but is better known for passionate anti-war and Civil Rights anthems. Continue Reading

Reports indicate Lucifer and the Almighty One may be close to a rapprochement that could bring Satan back to Heaven in a yet undisclosed role. St. Mark, spokesman for the Heavenly press office, continues to state that Lucifer left of his own accord and insists that there are no official plans to add anyone to the Heavenly trio.

However, in the last few months there have been rumors of discussions between the two sides. Insiders reached via email and ouija board have indicated that thumbs are prickling and an official announcement may be coming. Continue Reading

CAPE TOWN, South Africa (GlossyNews) — Having been an astronaut, toymaker, and motivational speaker, Ninja boasts an unusually long resume for a white man. He was making his rounds through the slums of Cape Town, South Africa, where he worked for the liquor company Jagermeister by distributing its contaminated byproducts to disadvantaged minorities in an effort to cut down on waste management costs, when a chance encounter inspired him to start the rave-rap trio Die Antwoord.

“I saw this Coloured street performer,” he said during our interview last week in the trophy room of his country estate, a relic of his British colonialist ancestors’ diamond mining slave empire, Continue Reading

MUNICH, Germany (GlossyNews) — U2 front man Bono underwent emergency back surgery on May 21, 2010, while preparing for the American leg of the band’s “360 Degree” international tour. U2, having sold an estimated 150 million records, is arguably the world’s most successful band. Any significant disruption to the concert series would deal a heavy blow to both fans and Live Nation, the promotions company responsible for handling U2’s merchandising, touring and branding rights. Continue Reading

TEXARKANA, TX (GlossyNews) — Thousands of angry fans flooded the phone lines and email servers of MTV/Electronic Arts and its retailers with complaints over today’s release of the eagerly anticipated “Rock Band – Def Leppard Edition” game. The issue stems from a perceived design flaw in the drum kit. Continue Reading

OSHKOSH, WI (GlossyNews) — A local 18-year-old, Mark Edwards, was ejected from the Life Fest Christian Rock Festival this past weekend for displaying a rude gesture during one of the band’s performances.

“I was watching Crossroads, and man, they we’re tearing it up!” Edwards told the press. “I was so into it, and before I knew it, I made the devil horns sign with my hand.” Continue Reading

LONDON, U.K. (GlossyNews) — Elton John, no stranger to controversy, made news again this week when he called Jesus of Nazareth gay in an interview with Parade Magazine. The statement angered many practicing Christians around the world. Catholic League President Bill Donohue said John’s claim implies that “the Messiah was a person who preached water and drank wine.” But Donohue also commented that it would be pointless to ask for an apology. Continue Reading