Lady Gaga Has Second Thoughts About Her “Do What You Want (With My Body)” Duet With R. Kelly.

Lady Gaga now regrets the song she did together with the popular pervert, proliferator of pubescent pornography and deflowerer of underage girls and perhaps small furry animals R. Kelly. The Ga now says of her 2013 conjugal ditty that ‘Do What You Want With My Body’ now disturbs her terribly. “Not only did we sing it, we did it.” confessed the singer fresh from her Golden Globe victory with the song “Shallow”.

And shallow she was when she trusted R. Kelly. And naive.

Part of her lyrics in the song were “Do what you want, don’t stop, let’s party.” And party Kelly did. On her body.

“It was beyond weird. It was humiliating. And sticky.” The Lady says that R. Kelly took the song and her body literally and violated it in imaginative ways we cannot mention here. Let’s just say that it involved such sexual modifications as shell-less snails, extra strong horseradish sauce, hugely oversized baby pacifiers, rubber, fur-less orangutan mannequins, high density motor oil infused with aloe vera and lavender, shaved chinchillas, rubber gloves with various angled attachments, peppermint flavored whipped cream with Tabasco and unusually flexible kitchen utensils. She claims he assaulted her various bodily orifices and protuberances with a lust that stretched horrendously and obscenely the meaning of the term ‘perversity.’

Says Gaga of the ordeal, “Years of therapy has finally given me the courage to speak out against this barbaric monstrosity of a human being. He seems to think that if someone or something has a hole in it that he has a right to it. His ‘manhood’ should be listed by the police as a weapon!”

When asked for a comment Kelly stated ,“Hey man, it was just nature, ya know?! I was just a guy doin’ a guy thing! What’s to get so upset about? Men got the plugs and women got the sockets, no matter how young they are. That’s Nature. They are there to be used, right? So why not? Even my 15 year old ex wife Aaliyah did an album titled “Age Ain’t Nothing But A Number.”

He then started to rap-

”Every guy is born with a rocket
and wants a place where he can dock it
he sure don’t want to stick it in his pocket.”

“It’s a man’s own special sprocket
so he searches for a socket
so fast you that could clock it.”

But if she should knock it
resist or try to block it
or even begin to mock it

then he should take his rocket
and away with it should walk it
and in passing just say “Oh, fock it!”

Kelly then presented some camera photos of his famous usages to the reporter of this article who promptly wretched all over them, upsetting Kelly.

“Dude! What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t you like Nature?”

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Tupac Parody! California Liberal (An Ode to White Liberal Guilt)

The White Liberal Community have now released a rap in order to try and justify their ridiculous ideology and attitude.

Interestingly enough, most POC in the United States of America and worldwide have rejected the hypocritical, sactimonious virtue-signalling of this song…

Wonder why!

California know to virtue
California know how to signal
In the city the city of PC
In the city the city of sleazy

Now let me welcome everybody to the White Liberal West
We got white liberal guilt and we got sins to confess
America was never great, and never the best
We oppress everyone cos of their race and their sex
We hate the NRA extremists cos they ain’t PC
Y’all never find a military-grade rifle on me
We’re tolerant, inclusive and we eat organic greens
We readin’ Guardian, Salon, MSNB to the C!
We don’t like intolerance, as you already knew
Don’t lock up ISIS terrorists except maybe a few Read more Tupac Parody! California Liberal (An Ode to White Liberal Guilt)

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Frank Turner Parody: Cameron Fucked The Pigs!

DEDICATED TO ALL OPPONENTS OF BOURGEOIS CENTRISM.

YES, THAT’S RIGHT! I’M BEING NICE THIS TIME…

Whatever happened to dogging?
The pigs are scared now David Cameron’s in the neighbourhood;
His truncheon’s small, deadly and harmful
He’s a nasty sexual deviant Tory shit!
And any little piggy on the farm he sees
Has to run to the farmer with a terrified squeal
They’re all tired of being tired out
Always being molested by Davie’s dangly bits! Read more Frank Turner Parody: Cameron Fucked The Pigs!
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Brexit Disco Classic! Theresa May Little Mix Parody: S/O 2 Mein Ex!

After Ann Widdecomber’s notorious Strictly Come Dancing disaster, centrist Tory Theresa May pulled a Trudeau with some epic Dad dancing in South Africa.

But the UK’s dancing queen has now gone further, and covered universally respected mainstream girlpop collective Little Mix. Let’s give it all up (and how!) for ‘S/O 2 Mein Ex!’

Make sure you click on for more! I promise you are not going to regret it…

Much.
Read more Brexit Disco Classic! Theresa May Little Mix Parody: S/O 2 Mein Ex!

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Another Confidential Leak from the CIA Hymnbook (X): “And Can it Be?”

The renowned hymn writer Charles Wesley was the brother of the famous evangelist John Wesley. However, the mighty values and spirit that drove these men is not to be found among today’s establishment. Here is another confidential leak from the Satanic Hymnbook of the CIA.
(Psst… Nothing to do with Wikileaks!) Read more Another Confidential Leak from the CIA Hymnbook (X): “And Can it Be?”

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Bob Dylan Parody (Tangled Up With Trudeau)

Early one mornin’ I was smokin’ a spliff
Couldn’t get outa bed
Wondrin’ if I’d ever changed the sheets
Or if I could still give amazin’ head

My folks said my life in Canada
Sure was gonna be tough
They never did like
PC  gender pronouns
Or authoritarian hate speech laws Read more Bob Dylan Parody (Tangled Up With Trudeau)

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