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19 May 2013 06:41 - by rfreed
The advantages to having Amish work on your farm: • They won’t be drunk on the job. • They won’t be cussing or spitting. • They won’t chase after your wife or daughter. • They won’t come to work high on smack, crack or twack. • They won’t be sleeping on the job. • They [...]
Posted in Biz News, Religionism0 Comments
19 May 2013 03:27 - by jeff boldt
In a colorful press conference held at the White House a few days ago, press secretary/circus master Jay Carney lived up to his last name as scandals piled up like elephants in a circus ring or clowns in a clown car. From Benghazi to the IRS to killing American citizens without trial to Michelle possibly [...]
Posted in Politics0 Comments
19 May 2013 12:29 - by Brian K. White
The argument is everywhere. Without the Bible, there would be no morality. Well that’s obviously untrue, since atheists are disproportionately absent in jails. Blame that on the lack of education of many Evangelicals (especially the home-schooled crowd) if you like, but you’ve got an all-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful being on your side. We just have science.
Posted in Comics, Religionism0 Comments
18 May 2013 06:41 - by Reidicule
LOS ANGELES — Following Tuesday’s season one finale, producers of the ABC reality cooking show The Taste announced yesterday that they have finished a deal to replace Celebrity Chef Ludo Lefebvre on the judging panel next season with Random Starving Ethiopian Child “Umbeke.” The move – which experts say should significantly increase the show’s ratings [...]
Posted in Television0 Comments
18 May 2013 03:14 - by dcinsider
United States Department of State Secretary John Kerry joined with Deputy Secretaries William Joseph Burns and Thomas Nides in an effort to destroy the 3D gun blue prints released by DEFCAD, a site hosted by Defense Distributed. The State Department uploaded the high profile digital agents into the network after Defense Distributed founder Cody Wilson [...]
Posted in Politics0 Comments
18 May 2013 12:21 - by Brian K. White
Virginia may ostensibly be for lovers, but recent legislation sought to restrict exactly which kinds of love that could be. Specifically, they wished to ban sodomy. This would mean no oral varieties or hinterlands sorts, but the bill was struck down. According to this comic, not everyone is happy with the decision, though perhaps not [...]
Posted in Comics, Crime0 Comments
17 May 2013 06:19 - by Veto Votti
Results of a new study completed by Grove City College suggest self-identifying libertarians like Bondage, Dominance, Submission, Sadism and Masochism (BDSM) relationships more than their opposites on the political spectrum: the fascists. Out of the 10000 people polled (split 50-50 between both ideologies), the libertarian column came up with an 89 percent appreciation rate for [...]
Posted in Health, Society3 Comments
17 May 2013 02:29 - by jeff boldt
In his own inimitable way, televangelist and former political aspirant, Pat Robertson, announced the release of his highly anticipated “Greatest Hits” VHS tape on his show The 700 Club yesterday. Five minutes later, it had already gone gold. “It’s unbelievable, really,” said industry mogul Tom Jones. “In a short amount of time Robertson’s tape was [...]
Posted in Religionism, Strange People1 Comment
17 May 2013 12:24 - by Brian K. White
Kind of a hard thing to boycott, an act of nature such as that. I guess you can bury your head in the sand and just pretend it didn’t happen, but why would you? A question only a hipster could answer. I boycott tampons. I don’t use them and I refuse to buy them. They’ll [...]
16 May 2013 06:27 - by Brian K. White
I bought a bag of dried ghost peppers from World Spice Market in Seattle last month and decided to try some different recipes with it. Ghost Pepper infused vodka, however, was a terrible, terrible idea. I soaked two full ghost peppers in a 375ml (pint) bottle for about a week. The vodka turned a dark [...]
Posted in Health, Video News3 Comments
16 May 2013 02:00 - by dcinsider
President Obama defended today his administration’s response to the Benghazi terror attack as a car bomb explosion killed several people near a Benghazi hospital. “Nobody understood exactly what was taking place during the course of those first few days” Obama said of last year’s attack on the U.S. Embassy in Benghazi as the blast today [...]
16 May 2013 12:07 - by Brian K. White
Ever wondered what girls learn when they go off to a separate class while you’re busy learning about resisting the temptation to masturbate yourself blind? They’re learning about why their girly things happen, and you don’t want to know about it. They possess the most amazing thing in the history of mankind, but it is [...]
Posted in Comics, Religionism1 Comment
15 May 2013 06:19 - by Brian K. White
Tea Party political activity groups, known for their hardline anti-tax position, were singled out by the IRS for scrutiny. “It’s crazy,” says anti-tax crusader and Wisconsin Tea Party head Colin Felcher. I can’t imagine a single reason why they’d think we’re against paying taxes. Unofficial IRS spokesman Davis Kaeng, who works by day as an [...]
15 May 2013 03:14 - by A. Russell
Landover, Maryland: In a decision reached last week by franchise owner Dan Snyder, The Washington Redskins will kick off the 2013-2014 season with a new name and mascot. The official date for the name change is July 25, the same day Redskin’s summer training camp begins. Players reporting to camp will be issued jerseys displaying [...]
Posted in Scandals, Sports4 Comments
15 May 2013 12:34 - by Brian K. White
If you’ve ever known someone who has been married, you know the pitfalls they face. An aging and perpetually less attractive spouse, inability to conscionably be with other sexual partners, and a general malaise that sits over your life like a 100-pound backpack. Some look at it from a doom and gloom perspective, but others, [...]
14 May 2013 06:21 - by Brian K. White
In the early 20th century, the rage was anglosizing. Making your immigration feel seemless by pretending to be from a different part of Europe. Today it’s gone beyond the color barrier, and many Muslims would just rather be mistaken for Mexicans. Muhammed “Jesus” Abdullah explained that, “it only took me six-months to learn enough Spanish [...]
Posted in Society, Strange People1 Comment
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