Phone Call Between Putin and Trump Regarding Value of American Lives
T: How much you paying them? P: $100,000 for each stinking American life. T: You’re shitting me. They’re not worth 2 cents. P: You pull my pud, Donny Boy – T: Feel good? Ha, ha! P: Hmmmmski… T: They’re SOLDIERS, for…
Here LIES the Trump Administration, 2016-2020 Trump’s Choices for Its Gravestone Epitaph
Frank Sinatra’s gravestone epitaph optimistically proclaims, “The Best is Yet to Come.” Johnny Cash’s memorial, maybe contemplating Lucifer and St. Peter vying for his presence, wryly notes “I Walk the Line” as a final farewell. Caustic comedian Rodney Dangerfield saw…
Sox/Yanks Broadcasting Booth Base Brawl: MLB’s Return on Fox
(October, 2020) Fox had heretofore deemed baseball too civilized, but seeing the newsworthiness of a sport on tilt with ugly negotiations, bitter tweets, and a cheating scandal barely in its rearview mirror, the decision to replicate its political approach broadcasting…
RAP TRUMP: A HAMILTONIAN MUSICAL OF AND FOR OUR TIMES
Hamilton brought history to a new generation. Rap Trump seeks the same at a time when the original has returned to the Disney Channel. Kanye West plays Donald Trump [T]; Queen Latifah plays Nancy Pelosi [P]; and Lin-Manuel Miranda plays…
Trumpisms 10.0 by Richard Seltzer
335 Satan is a great composer. His sin-phonies are epic. Especially his Trumplandia in B Flat Minor. 336 Millions of teenagers are now having a premature senior moment — their gradu-wait-ion ceremony. 337 An apt quote from Oliver Wendell Holmes:…
Mutharika Makes Statement On Vampires
As the world becomes a smaller place thanks to digital technology, it’s becoming easier than ever to pass ideas from one culture to another. Digital streaming means that we can view films that were made in other countries and in…
“Everyone should get back to work and stop thinking critically,” say Residents Fighting Against Town Name Change
The world is actively trying to purge systemic racism from every nook and cranny of our lives and institutions. Statues of racists are tumbling down across the world, and now, even racist town names are being changed in a move…
Make America Gag Again
Atlanta (AP) Just when the Trump Administration thought things could not get any worse, the Center for Disease Control released a report on the dramatic increase of Non-Covid19, related Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome (CVS20), that has ravaged sixty-five percent of the country…
A Majority of Americans Would Rather Repeatedly Shove Flaming Chopsticks in Their Ears than Hear the Words “President Howie”
HAMDEN, CT— Quinnipiac University released a poll early this morning showing that over 80% of Americans wouldn’t be comfortable with a President named Howie. The study, conducted in the wake of Howie Hawkins’ nomination as the Green Party’s candidate for…
Washington Redskins to be Renamed Rainbow-Farting-Unicorns
In a controversial move deisgned to appease the nation’s vegan transgender vaping atheists and left-handed male feminist pastafarian apache helicopters, the Washington Redskins have agreed to rename their team to the more politically correct Fedex-Farting-Unicorns. Dan Snyder, owner of the Washington Redskins,…
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