Recent Posts

Posted in Top Stories

Charlize Theron is “Shockingly Available“ & Waiting For Someone To “Step Up” & Ask Her Out On A Date – YEAH, RIGHT!!!!!

Charlize Theron can’t find a date? Yeah, right again! Charlize Theron, arguably the best looking woman in Hollywood, possessing only the elitest of chromosomes, worth…

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Posted in Politics Top Stories

DOWN WITH HATE SPEECH! Bipartisan Bill Finally Makes US Corporations Protected Class

The notoriously divided America of today has many disputes and disagreements, whether it be border security, the climate crisis or social media conflict by liberal…

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Posted in Society

By the Grace of Sean (Bad Poetry for Bad Media)

Bellicose, via mega phone, go… Secure your homes, Holmes, Cause you’re all alone, Jones All the skin and bones talk, All them victims criss-crossed… With…

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Posted in Entertainment

OWCH! 80s Nerd Escapes Self-Imposed Seclusion: Finds D&D Gone MAINSTREAM!

Wealthy 80’s nerd accidentally emerges from self-imposed seclusion only to discover that D&D is cool now Walter Sebastian Wasp Rogers IV suffered an embarrassing episode…

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Posted in Society

Cruella De Ville Muscling My Customer

”What is it?” I said looking at a very indecisive customer. ”I’m just not sure if I should buy the shoes, mate!” he says, confusing…

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Posted in General Interest

IMPORTANT: Login Temporarily Unavailable for Glossy News Users!

Dear friends, logins are temporarily unavailable for our authors. Please email wallacerunnymede@gmail.com instead. Once our site is upgraded to https, and any other relevant procedures…

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Posted in Politics

Great Was the Fall (Parable on America With an Ancient Feel)

In the days of the old King, King Bush, the people did eat of the fat of the earth and drink of the fruit of…

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Posted in General Interest

How Online Gambling Has Officially Become Socially Acceptable

How Online Gambling Has Officially Become Socially Acceptable You know society, the beautiful and friendly nature of society? Well that wasn’t always there and in…

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Posted in Politics Society

Gay Old Party Strikes Again! Auntie Lindsay 2020, the Closet Choice! (Ted Haggard Guest Post)

NOTE FROM WALLACE: Our occasional guest contributor, Ted ‘I Know What You Did Last Night’ Haggard has provided us with one of the saltiest, spiciest…

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Posted in Politics

OH, GOD! IT’S NOT THAT TIME AGAIN IS IT???????

Noooooooooooooooo! It can’t be! It’s inhumane! Its monstrous! It just can’t be true!

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