Archive | Health

The Delicious Truth About How Chicken Nuggets Are REALLY Made [Video]

The Delicious Truth About How Chicken Nuggets Are REALLY Made [Video]

You’ve seen images of pink slime, but you have no idea what really goes on or goes in.

The truth with set you free, specifically free to save money while gobbling down amazing and delicious chicky nuggies. Read on.

More Videos in this Series
How Hot Dogs are REALLY Made (shocking!)
How Twinkies are REALLY Made (you won’t believe it!)

Our cameras went around the world to gleam these glimmers of truth to show you the shockingly delicious ways in which chicken nuggets are actually made.

Watch the Video, then Scroll Down for the Commentary

In this rare, full documentary, our investigators go behind the scenes to see what that creepy clown won’t show you. I don’t mean McDonald’s, but I can understand why you’d think that when I say “creepy clown.”

No, I meant Jack in the Box. That’s still a clown and his reconstituted chicken remnants are even cheaper and more curiosity inspiring that the other guy’s… the other creepy clown.

If you think clowns are scary, three things to bear in mind:

1 – You are an adult, get over the whole clown phobia.

2 – You should see what goes into Chicken Nuggets, because it’s so much richer and more layered than even your worst-best tasty dreams.

3 – Seriously though, clowns? You right to be scared, they’re here to devour your ever-loving soul!

If you have a suggestion for foods, products or services you’d like us to uncover, please suggest it in the YouTube comments, or on the Facebook comments on this article.

And God save the King and Queen, meaning Burger King and Dairy Queen, and I assume their bastard daughter Wendy… Chipotle.

Share

Posted in Health, Video News0 Comments

Ebola Nurses Going on Tour

Ebola Nurses Going on Tour

Dallas, TX-As part of an initiative to educate the public about the dangers of Ebola, 5 of the nurses who have been treating Ebola victims in Dallas are going to be embarking on a 45 day and 3 hour tour.

“This will not be just a tour, but really a great way to educate the public about this terrible disease and hopefully prevent it from spreading further,” said Juanita Rose Erikson, one of the nurses who has treated several of the Ebola patients in a Dallas hospital. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Society0 Comments

Widespread Ebola Pandemic Fears A “Huge Confidence Booster” For Previously Modest Ebolavirus

Widespread Ebola Pandemic Fears A “Huge Confidence Booster” For Previously Modest Ebolavirus

SENEGAL – Explaining that it was, “as surprised as the next viral particle,” about the panic surrounding a potential global Ebola outbreak, EBOV, the virus responsible for Ebola Hemorrhagic Fever, held a press conference this week detailing its seemingly pleasant surprise at the worldwide discussion regarding its supposed pandemic-worthy virulence factors.

“Don’t get me wrong, I have always known my mortality rate was above average,” explained the negative-sense, single-stranded RNA virion. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Science1 Comment

EXCLUSIVE: Hidden Cameras Capture Truth Inside Twinkies [VIDEO]

EXCLUSIVE: Hidden Cameras Capture Truth Inside Twinkies [VIDEO]

Sure, they may taste like banana rainbows and unicorn “stuff” when they’re finished, but what goes into a pastry as yellow and creamy as a Twinkie may make you yellow and squeamish.

We sent an undercover investigator in the depthy bowels of America’s agricultish nightmare for almost 18-months to uncover the truth.

To see what goes in to get what comes out, and discover why it tastes so disgustingly delicious. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Video News1 Comment

Breadfeeding: What You Need To Know

Breadfeeding: What You Need To Know

All across America, parents and their newborns have been latching onto the breadfeeding craze by using an excavated recipe from the ruins of the now extinct restaurant chain, the Olive Garden.

Many are being cautious with the new formula as they are supplementing their current nutritional plans with the fattening butter and garlic recipe made famous by Olive Garden’s once refillable breadstick baskets that came complimentary with the purchase of any entrée or as part of the soup, salad and breadstick option that was only available for lunchtime dining. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Society0 Comments

Busy Tech Execs Boost Productivity, Put Children On Ice

Busy Tech Execs Boost Productivity, Put Children On Ice

When LaShonda Martinez’s boss first offered to freeze her three-year-old son, the programmer was aghast. “I was all like, you want to do what? But then, once they explained themselves, I was all like, yeah, maybe.”

In light of recent benefits offered by tech giants Google and Facebook to freeze employees embryos, Washington-based Microsoft revealed that not only had they a similar policy in place, but that they would actually place already born babies and toddlers into suspended animation as to not interfere with their employee’s workloads. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Biz News, Health0 Comments

Vatican Wafer Gate

Vatican Wafer Gate

Wikileaks has done it again. The release of 3.4 billion database searchable electronic records is reverberating around the Internet with many new stunning revelations.

The latest to be revealed is a series of directives between the US and the Vatican. In what appears to be a quid pro quo, it appears that a deal was struck whereby the Justice Department would “be soft” in prosecuting abusive priests and let the church deal with them in return for letting a GMO ingredient into their communion wafer.

This was only for North American Catholic churches and began during the millennium crisis. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Religionism3 Comments

Coloradoans Now Even Bigger A**holes Since Start Of Legalized Pot

Coloradoans Now Even Bigger A**holes Since Start Of Legalized Pot

The wonder mellower-outer cannabis, always said to have a positive, tranquilizing affect on its users, has unfortunately not had such an effect on the normally ego-centered Coloradoans who recently legalized use of it.

“Criminy,” said Jim Bames, over the road trucker who delivers freight from Kansas to Colorado regularly “I thought that stuff was supposed to mellow you out! Why them guys now are worse than ever. They was plain old jerks before. Now that they’s smoked up they’s is now super jerks!” Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Human Interest0 Comments

College Senior More Concerned With Zombie Apocalypse Than Future

College Senior More Concerned With Zombie Apocalypse Than Future

University if Missouri, Columbia — Despite his mounting college debt and lack of employment, college senior Brent Hamilton appears to be more troubled by the prospect of a zombie apocalypse than his imminent future.

“Brent’s always been a little eccentric, but lately all he talks about is a potential zombie outbreak,” revealed Devin Carter, Brent’s roommate for the past two years.

“He can’t even walk to class without pointing out which buildings are deathtraps and whether or not a facility is perfect for undead sniping. The guy didn’t even consider going to the job fair because it was being held in the Mizzou Rec Complex. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Strange People0 Comments

Sex Ed Declared Gross and Bad

Sex Ed Declared Gross and Bad

Oakland, Indiana — Sexual Education is a course dealing with human sexuality, including anatomy, reproduction, health, and reproductive rights and responsibilities.

The topic of whether or not sexual education should be instructed in public schools is still highly controversial and a common debate even in 2014.

Jefferson Middle School recently adapted a semester long Sex Ed course required for all seventh graders. This decision received a lot of backlash from angry parents who subsequently demanded a public forum with the Oakland City Schools board to explain their side of things. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Education, Health1 Comment

Sex Crazed Teens “Syruping” Leads to Genital Ants

Sex Crazed Teens “Syruping” Leads to Genital Ants

One invariable about teens is that, whether raised in the abstinence-only belt of high teen birth rates, or normal states, kids be getting down and dirty.

This latest crazy craze involves young girls, often those from the flag team, dousing their young male counterparts, often from track or football teams, with various sugary syrups in advance of intimate encounters. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Kidz Zone0 Comments

Piggy Adam Richman Mocks Critic; Beats Eating Crap Out of Him

Piggy Adam Richman Mocks Critic; Beats Eating Crap Out of Him

Piggy Adam Richman Mocks Critic; Beats Eating the Crap Out of Him (Family-Friendly Censored Version)

Mr. Piggy Adam Richman, a titty overweight eater, who had his very own show on the Travel Channel mocked his “critics” by posting a comment, “Grab a razor blade and draw a bath.”

He later went on to apologize and calm the tits out of everyone before he went to panic mode. The stunt surprised everyone, given the fact that Adam only eats when he’s mad. Putting a comment such as may as well saved his life from another heart attack. Poor fatty. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Television0 Comments

The Condemned No Longer Fear The Reaper

The Condemned No Longer Fear The Reaper

FLORENCE, Ariz. (GlossyNews) — A government think tank has come up with a novel idea to ensure there are no more botched executions like the one that occurred this week in Arizona. States have traveled a long and winding road to find alternatives after a shortage of standard execution drugs. This shortage was created by European drug manufacturers banging their opposition to capital punishment like a cowbell. Thus far, States have been unsuccessful in finding suitable alternatives as exemplified by West Virginia’s “meth, gun powder and white lightening” concoction that just seems to make the condemned more hostile than usual. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Science, Top Stories2 Comments

Hog Farmers Proudly Sell Parts Right to the Bitter, Musky Ends

Hog Farmers Proudly Sell Parts Right to the Bitter, Musky Ends

Social media has blown up with images of an actual box of American made pork product, the “Boneless Pork Rectum, Inverted”. We take you inside this unusual treat.

Boneless means without bone. Pork is the industry term for pig products. A rectum, well, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much and it’s daddy’s birthday. Oh, never mind, I don’t want to spoil the surprise. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Biz News, Health1 Comment

Militant Crossfit Group Claims Responsibility in Suicide Bombing of 24-Hour Fitness

Militant Crossfit Group Claims Responsibility in Suicide Bombing of 24-Hour Fitness

SAN DIEGO, CA. The brutal conflict between traditional, moderate fitness aficionados at franchise gyms and the growing radical Crossfit movement escalated tragically yesterday, as a suicide bomb exploded in a 24-Hour Fitness in the LaJolla neighborhood of San Diego, killing 5 and wounding 12.

The alleged perpetrator, Johhny “Burpee” Lawrence, 26, was a member of Crossfit Jihad, a militant fitness group known to meet in an extremist training facility, or what is called a “box” in Crossfit doctrine. Lawrence’s “box” trained in the garage of a local leader, or “coach,” Mick McAllister. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Religionism0 Comments

New Study Shows the Mexican Cartel to Be “Bunch of Homos(exuals)”

New Study Shows the Mexican Cartel to Be “Bunch of Homos(exuals)”

A new study done by the Political Association of Immigration Soldiers and American Students reveals the Mexican Cartel, the same people that love to molest its house rats (no, not their children), to be having mass intercourse with one another. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, World News0 Comments

Page 1 of 1612345...10...Last »
Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Exclusive Exposés

-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Visit the “Old Version” of our Site

     
Still want more? Find thousands of buried satirical gems in our archives on the old version of Glossy News!

Check This Out!

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

12 posts
6 posts
4 posts
3 posts
3 posts
1 post
1 post


All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial