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Journalist Undercover in “Gay Conversion” Clinic finds Methods Shocking

Journalist Undercover in “Gay Conversion” Clinic finds Methods Shocking

Pat Jacobs, a long-time critic of LGBTQ proponents, chose to silence xer YouTube channel last year to go undercover to see how the so-called “Gay Conversion” clinics actually operate. What xhe found may shock you to your very core, or not, depending on if you know anything about these places. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Society1 Comment

But I’m Oppressed! (SPOILER: No You’re Not!) (3/4)

But I’m Oppressed! (SPOILER: No You’re Not!) (3/4)

Self-Diagnosis

What is self-diagnosis? Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Opinion/Editorial0 Comments

North Korea Linked To Upsurge In UK Cycling

North Korea Linked To Upsurge In UK Cycling

Alarming new intelligence has linked North Korea to the upsurge in UK cycling. Continue Reading

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Posted in Crime, Health, Politics, Society, Top Stories2 Comments

Dems Offer Compromise on Weed Legalization: Let’s Agree to call it “Marihuana”

Dems Offer Compromise on Weed Legalization: Let’s Agree to call it “Marihuana”

With Vermont and Massachusetts added to the growing list of states with legal, recreational marijuana, congress has been scrambling to lower taxes on billionaires and name new post offices. But one congressman has a different plan. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Politics0 Comments

Doctors are Heroic for facing Blood and Guts without Puking, says Surgeon

Doctors are Heroic for facing Blood and Guts without Puking, says Surgeon

Dateline: WHYNOT, NC—Surgeons are responding to the criticism that they’re vain and overpaid, by asking the critics to imagine what it’s like being elbow-deep in blood and guts. Continue Reading

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The evolution of science in eye care

The evolution of science in eye care

If there is one area in which science has really changed the game, it is eye care. This is especially true in our modern, digital age – if you think of how much science has pushed eye care forward, it is amazing. Continue Reading

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Can You Save Money on Heating AND Keep Warm?

Can You Save Money on Heating AND Keep Warm?

It’s difficult to keep your room warm and save money at the same time. Continue Reading

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Autism of the Playpen? The Juvenile Mediocrity of ‘Autistic Nihilism’

Autism of the Playpen? The Juvenile Mediocrity of ‘Autistic Nihilism’

Autistic Entitlement & Victimhood are Part of a Broader Occidental Zeitgeist

Some time ago, I made some tweets about the problem of how some people de-emphasize the importance of autistic people cultivating ourselves. Continue Reading

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Liberals accused of Insensitivity for mocking Mentally-Disordered President Trump

Liberals accused of Insensitivity for mocking Mentally-Disordered President Trump

Dateline: WASHINGTON, D.C.—Martha Mollycoddle, the mother of a man diagnosed as a psychopath and currently undergoing treatment in a hospital for the criminally insane, has begun a campaign to shame liberals and Democrats for mocking President Trump as a result of his similar mental disorder. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Politics0 Comments

God praised for outfitting Donald Trump with Self-Destruct Button

God praised for outfitting Donald Trump with Self-Destruct Button

Dateline: LOS ANGELES—Thousands of Americans, who resist Donald Trump’s presidency on the grounds that he is literally a psychopath, have formed a religious group calling for praise of God for supplying the psychopath Donald Trump with a self-destruct button.

The group is called Small Mercies and was founded in Los Angeles, by Joey Garbanzo. Members of the group call themselves The Thankful, thus fulfilling the phrase, being “thankful for small mercies.”
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Posted in Health, Politics0 Comments

Male Sperm Counts Lower; Women Blamed

Male Sperm Counts Lower; Women Blamed

Researchers from Israel, The US, Denmark and Australia have reported that male sperm counts have declined 60% in the past 40 years and claim that women simply aren’t doing enough to give their man a good, hard stiffie. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Top Stories1 Comment

We Are A Fly On The Wall At The Republican Formation Of The New Health Plan.

We Are A Fly On The Wall At The Republican Formation Of The New Health Plan.

We are a fly on the wall at the Republican formation of the new health plan. 

“What are we going to do?” whispered Mitch McConnell secretly to Mike Pence. “If we don’t get this new AbominableCare bill through our handlers will come down on us heavy!”

“First off, I think we should change the name. It sounds too much like ObamaCare. Secondly, what do you mean by handlers?” Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Politics0 Comments

Sneezing is One Tenth of an Orgasm: Islamic State Make War on Moldy Houses

Sneezing is One Tenth of an Orgasm: Islamic State Make War on Moldy Houses

ISIS and dodgy landlords.
One is an evil gang of nefarious gangsters and mafiosi, who give zero fucks about anyone else, and will trample over anyone in their day, doing whatever it takes to expand their evil empire.
The other one is an Islamic terrorist organization!
Still, it turns out that the freewheeling, freeriding anarcho-capitalist idealists and rugged individualists, er, Unitarians, are not at all satisfied with their radical Marxist housing policy of forcibly de-gentrifying the ancient Syrian metropolis of Palmyra. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, War Zone0 Comments

How Sausages are Really Made: Shocking

How Sausages are Really Made: Shocking

Brian K. White, this poor lil city-dwellin’ Seattle Washing ‘un type, has been sayin’ on the Youtube:

Everyone loves sausage, but few of us know how it’s REALLY made.
The answer is not merely shocking, but equal parts disgusting and delicious.

FAKE NEWS!
Sausages, now them yokes all git gonna be newwwwwtricious and auspicious!
Before, Bobby Joe done git y’all these there purty lil videos on…
The Youtube!
Videos are them things what makes the entersplainment real funny, and a damn good thing to us all we be doin’ with!
When y’all sittin’ in the shack on your one-man lonesome, ain’t nuffing better than a good wholesome, heartsome, MOCK-YOU-MEANT-AREE to chase away the cobwebs, and make your heart sing up and float to skies like a goddarn goose-varmint. Continue Reading

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Posted in Health, Video News0 Comments

Hotheads’ Violence caused by Hot Climates, Study finds

Hotheads’ Violence caused by Hot Climates, Study finds

Dateline: GREENLAND—A sociobiological study from Bigwig University in Ittoqqortoormiit, Greenland shows that the areas around the world with the hottest temperatures tend to be inhabited by more aggressive, bellicose peoples, or “hotheads,” as the study calls them, while colder zones are home to more peaceful, even timid populations.

The team of scientists concludes that collective belligerence is a form of literal hot-headedness in which a screaming-hot environment transfers its heat to the human head and turns the mind into a stew of animal reactions, bypassing the brain’s rational faculties and driving the population as a whole to childish displays of wonton irrationality and brutality.

The deserts of the Middle East and Africa, along with Southeast Asia, Central America, Mexico, and the southern (Republican) United States are marked by dictatorships, perennial civil wars, gang wars, coups, chaos, rampant crime, riots, bloody uprisings, bigotry or fundamentalist lunacy.

By contrast, Canada, Alaska, the northern (Democratic) United States, and Europe are known for being sober, peaceful, and stable to the point of being infamously dull.

“It’s hard to stir up trouble,” said the team’s lead researcher, Professor Francesca Bobbins, “or to get all offended and hot-headed when there’s a foot of snow outside your door or when you know the snow will come in a matter of weeks or months. I mean literally, it’s hard to heat your head enough to sustain animal rage when it’s often super-cold out.

“But just imagine living in a desert that fries and scrambles your brains. How can you stop to think when you’re always stinking and soaking wet with sweat? Haven’t you got to take your rage out on someone, like the government or a rival sect or some other scapegoat? Mustn’t the excess heat that bubbles up in the heads of those dwelling in a humid environment be vented back into the world by some series of violent outbursts to prevent those heads from exploding?”

The researchers tested their hypothesis by observing the facial expressions and by measuring the heat steaming off of the heads of subjects who agreed just to stand for hours in the streets of altogether too-hot places, including San Antonio, Mexico City, Khartoum, Riyadh, and Bangkok. Invariably, the test subjects became increasingly agitated as the sweat streamed down their faces, dampening their shirts and messing up their underwear.

Subjects reported feeling their blood boil when strangers stopped merely to say “Hello” and were unable to concentrate when the researchers posed simple problems to them to determine whether heat negatively affects cognition.

“The sociobiologist asked me, ‘What’s two times four?’ and I swear I blanked,” recalled one test subject. “Back home in Halifax, Canada, I could have answered that with no problem, but standing there in Riyadh in that dreadful heat, my fevered brain was racing from one impulse and nonsensical notion to the next, as if the desert were boiling my neurons. All I could think was: ‘Get me the fuck out of this oppressive heat!’ And failing that, ‘Whom can I take out this aggression on?’”

As one of the researchers explained, “It’s like the difference between cold and boiling water. When water is very cold it’s frozen and so it tends to stay put, going nowhere; but when it boils, it spills out and bubbles up everywhere from the transfer of energy.”

Critics point out that the experiment was conducted in large cities, which suggests that the aggression may have been caused not by the blazing heat, but by the nearby presence of way too many people, the principle being as Sartre said, that “Hell is other people.”

The researchers replied that there are large cities in peaceful nations too, such as Toronto, Canada. What turns one large population into “placid, mousey little nobodies” and another into “a horde of raging orcs and barbarians” is largely the climate, said Professor Bobbins. “For example, the infusion of Middle Eastern immigrants into France and the UK and the conflicts this has stirred up there can be interpreted thermodynamically. The immigrants’ heads store the excess heat from their native lands and disperse it in the cooler climates of Western Europe. That transfer of heat causes social chaos.”

The report has also been criticized for failing to take into account the counterexample of Australia. Australians are known for being friendly and laid back, and yet much of that continent is as hot as anywhere else on the planet.

The researchers credit this apparent discrepancy to Australia’s British heritage. Like Canada, modern Australia was colonized by the United Kingdom. The team theorized that abundant rain can function like snow in dissuading a population from wanting to go outdoors to kick up a mighty ruckus.

“The rain-soaked temperament of Brits was passed onto Australian culture, making Aussies as tranquil and bloodless as Canadians,” said Professor Bobbins.

“As for Russia,” she continued, “while it’s true that Russians have historically preferred authoritarian rulers and been as brutal as all get-out, as in their laying waste to the Nazis, it’s notable that the soviets saw their ideology as being especially rational, even scientific. The Nazis, too, looked to science to support their social Darwinian prejudices.

“Temperature is only one factor in determining a population’s passivity or aggression, not the only one,” she conceded. “But while European and North Asian forms of violence are couched in rational or pseudoscientific terms, those forms that break out in scorching-hot zones are chaotic or primitive, showing similarities to the sort of genetic tribalism we see in other species.

“This is because the sweltering heat shuts down the cerebral cortex, leaving mainly the older, emotional and reactionary parts of the brain to steer the ship—and to pick up the pieces when those primitive forms of thinking crash the ship into a cliff.”

The team’s research has also been criticized for being flat-out racist. Professor Bobbins said in response that she “doesn’t care about skin colour. It’s not about innate differences between people, since even an annoyingly-polite Canadian will start to act like a jihadist nut job if he’s forced to live for years in a desert. Like they say in real estate, it’s ‘location, location, location.’”

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Posted in Crime, Health, Science0 Comments

Man with Skin Cancer loathes Doctors, Dies without Medical Treatment

Man with Skin Cancer loathes Doctors, Dies without Medical Treatment

Dateline: NEW JERSEY—Morris Berbowski, a 53 year-old man, died from skin cancer after refusing to be treated by any doctor for seven years, because he couldn’t find one who wasn’t “a condescending douchebag.”

Seven years ago, Berbowski did show a doctor an embarrassing rash that had developed on his legs and backside, but was traumatized by the experience.
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Posted in Health, Human Interest0 Comments

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