Pre-Dystopian America, Two Different Endings!

Thanks so much for following the Honest Adolph serial here at Glossy News. You can catch up on any updates about any future book release at Glossy News, as well as our Facebook page, which you can like right away! However, the easiest way might well be to follow my Patreon.
By the way, those subscribers who take the second-lowest patronage level or above (i.e. $3 + per month) will get access to the epilogue, which does NOT feature on the Glossy News serial!
Don’t worry… The novel ends perfectly well at the final chapter, which some of you will have read recently.
The epilogue is NOT AT ALL NECESSARY, because the novel finishes pretty well without it.
However, some of you may be itching to read more… Read more Pre-Dystopian America, Two Different Endings!


Chapter 32: It Depends on What “Democracy” Is (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

Some months later, it was the eve of the election. Pilder had already won the Democratic nomination by default. Meanwhile, Bubble had easily demolished the few remaining stragglers, who simply couldn’t compete with his relentless barrage of cruelty, crassness and viciousness.
The Presidential debates had turned out to be every bit as horrific (if horrifically entertaining also!) as expected.
And even the Machiavellian cunning of Pilder was at times lost for words; the Democratic candidate only had partial and half-hearted support from the party establishment, as he had never been supposed to win in the first place. Dark rumours persisted that the private view of the party hierarchy was that the Democrats would actually benefit if Pilder were to crash and burn; because it would kill off radical change in all forms, for a generation; if not ten, or twenty, or a hundred.
At the moment, it looked like Bubble was a shoe-in. This was not to say, of course, that support was universal. Some juvenile college students and professional grievance peddlers still doggedly clung to the corpse of Democratic progressivism; Bennie Pilder seemed to represent the dying scream, the final, desperate death throes of a doomed party. It was rumoured that the party might split completely if Pilder ended up suffering the commonly predicted electoral massacre. But nobody seriously thought that would make any difference, no matter what they said. Read more Chapter 32: It Depends on What “Democracy” Is (Honest Adolph, Volume III)


Chapter 30: Neurodiversity is Mighty (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

Saul pored through his transcript of this debate. He clumsily dragged a purple, jagged line with his marker pen; an unusual choice for a task like this, but so be it. As he stood up and moved towards the restroom, Deborah subtly inched over to have a look.
She was quite shocked to read the transcript, and she wondered if Saul was quite well. She found it hard to believe that what she was reading was a true and authentic transcript of the recent debate.
Ha! Are you here to save the little guy?
No, I am not here to save the little guy. And there is no little guy. Each one of us, I say yes, every one of us, we are all mighty giants! But we are ever under the boots of cringing dwarves.
[ENSUING SOCIALIST UPROAR AT CHOICE OF WORDS] Read more Chapter 30: Neurodiversity is Mighty (Honest Adolph, Volume III)


Chapter 29: Conspiracy Corners (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

The media tore into Adams after the debate. In fact, if anything, the sensationalist conservative media outlets went easier on him than the more established, mainstream outlets. For quite some time, the latter had been devoted largely to secondary journalism, i.e. relying parasitically on the hard work of the largely vanishing indymedia market. Over time, the smaller and more agile outlets had found themselves increasingly unable to compete, as the mainstream outlets looted as much of their work as they possibly could, while cynically dismissing the rest of their work as ‘conspiracy theories.’


Chapter 28: Things Not Yet Seen (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

Senator Bubble was succeeding very well in picking off his opponents one by one. Although he was not himself a very intelligent or articulate person, he was certainly smart enough to flatter and bribe his way to what by now seemed a certain victory. The conservative media and much of the party machinery seemed to have realised that the only way to beat Benny Pilder would be to choose the most entertaining candidate. There was certainly a large field of candidates; but most of them were boring, plagued by scandals, or simply too ambitious.


Chapter 27: Everyone Has a Choice to Right (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

Deborah was disappointed to learn that the media were turning their turrets on Adolph. Now that their golden boy had left, they seemed to have little interest in ridiculing Benny Pilder; Honest Adolph, previously known only as a ‘fringe maverick,’ was now consistently demonised day in, day out.
The quality of the commentary never seemed to get any better; nor did it seem to deteriorate. For reasons Deborah could never quite discern, Adolph was hated even more than Benny Pilder. Deborah had already begun to entertain the possibility that all this wall-to-wall on message demonisation might actually boost Adolph, because reverse psychology is often a deeply disruptive force in nomination campaigns; not to mention the actual election itself! However, she was still unsure. ‘A nomination is not an election, and an election is not a nomination,’ she muttered to herself; over, and over, and over, and over, again.
One thing that was striking about the media coverage was its radical inconsistency.
On the one hand, Pilder had flippantly referred to Adams as a ‘strong leader in a tight spot.’ The media then mentioned that the debate had happened shortly after Holocaust Memorial Day, and that because Adams did not descend into campus ‘call out’ culture and note the tastelessly demeaning character of the slur, he had acted weakly, and that Adams’ discretion and civility were not really discretion and civility at all, but merely a tacit way of condoning or excusing Pilder’s crass and vulgar comment.


NAP Tips and Predictions

All of the best betting websites provide their own NAP of the Day, and there’s a lot of reasons why they choose to do this. The only issue is that coming to terms regarding exactly what one is can be a bit of a challenge for less experienced punters. NAPs are one of the primary bets when it comes to betting on horse racing, so working out what they are and how best to utilise them is likely to benefit you in the long run.

What is a NAP of the Day?

Read more NAP Tips and Predictions


College Life: What to Expect

Unlike high school, a typical college day is a lot less scheduled depending on how well you plan and manage your day. In addition, you have more freedom and opportunities to explore your interests and passions. While at it, you can join online educational forums such as Rincon del Vago. There you can interact with peers from different colleges while at the same time learning from educational material that is present. Read more College Life: What to Expect


Uncouth Act at Remembrance Day Inspires Award-Winning Poem

London Poet Alan Wright has won ‘Poem of the year 2018’ – an impromptu poem recital, inspired by the actions of an uncouth man in the crowd at London’s Remembrance Day.

Wright 52, told Glossy News:

“I was asked to recite a poem at Remembrance Day in London, to honour the sacrifices British soldiers have made in past wars. Her Majesty the Queen and leaders of the main political parties laid down wreaths at the base of the cenotaph, and a two minute’s silence was impeccably observed. Read more Uncouth Act at Remembrance Day Inspires Award-Winning Poem


Glossy News Has Published Our First Book! Never Have I Ever: the Game in Book Form

You know those $30 board games you play that are really wicked and really fun? Yeah, we made our own version, and it’s in book form; and it’s available for $5.99 on the first edition. The second edition promises to cost more; but this one is really fun, superbly clever, and wicked as all-get-out.

It’s the culmination of over a year’s work and we’re really proud of it.

The book is available here on Amazon.

There are rules of course, and play pieces you can cut out from the back page. But all that’s purely secondary to the replayability of it all.

With an average of 30-questions to finish the game, and over 800 questions in the book, the replay value promises to be around 28-plays.

Compare that with Cards Against Humanity which costs $26, and has a replay value of about two times. This game is around 21-cents a play, versus $13. I mean, you’re coming out ahead right out of the gate, but don’t take it from me! Read more Glossy News Has Published Our First Book! Never Have I Ever: the Game in Book Form


Chapter 26: Snowflake Stormtroopers (Honest Adolph Volume III)

Saul had not yet heard about the terrible events from last night. He was planning to pay a visit to the Thatchers later in the day; for now, he was commiserating with Adams about his poor showing the previous night.

‘Do you think it is possible, Saul?’ Adolph said.

Saul nodded gently. Read more Chapter 26: Snowflake Stormtroopers (Honest Adolph Volume III)


Chapter 25: Just-So Stories (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

Presidential nominations, generally speaking, go to those with the biggest mouth, and not the greatest intellect or grandest patriotism.

But how far this may be a universal principle is something which, perhaps, remains to be seen. Read more Chapter 25: Just-So Stories (Honest Adolph, Volume III)


Chapter 24: The Pristine Jade Hall Palace of Eternal Slumber (Honest Adolph, Volume III)

The Halls of Mandos, then. So this is me. Let’s knock this on down, brother, for the health of the world.

Saul paced the long, marble corridors.

Was he waiting for someone?

Big Xian?

A Golden knight on a nearby pillar sprang into life.

Read more Chapter 24: The Pristine Jade Hall Palace of Eternal Slumber (Honest Adolph, Volume III)


If you Don’t Laugh, You’ll Cry! Chase the Demons Away with these Great Books from Our AMAZING Satire Team!

Glossy News has plenty of great satirists!

And many of them have written books; hence the handy guide below. (Keep reading!)

The following is not, of course, an exhaustive list of the books by our various funny people.

However, we will indeed do a few more of these articles occasionally! Read more If you Don’t Laugh, You’ll Cry! Chase the Demons Away with these Great Books from Our AMAZING Satire Team!