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Fox News Forge Anti-Labour Party Screed (2/2)

Fox News Forge Anti-Labour Party Screed (2/2)

Here’s more of the same.

And it’s not often I say that about Fox News!

To be frank, I have no doubt in my mind that many individuals in Labour are horrified at how our party is being occupied by militarists and imperialists.

But the fact remains that whatever the character and opinions of individual Labour members may be, their voices are not likely to prevail, for now… Continue Reading

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The News (Really) Bytes – June 2015

The News (Really) Bytes – June 2015

Jeb Bush announces candidacy for President – The head political office of the U.S. is now going back to the Bush Leagues.

Rachel Dolezal, a white person, pretended to be black and became head of the Spokane Washington NAACP and now has stepped down making true the statement “Once you go black you hate to go back”.

Hurricane Bill threatens the Texas coast. Hurricane Rick Perry threatens the entire country.

The Jurassic World movie reboot sets record for opening week for a movie – who ever knew dinosaurs could reincarnate? Continue Reading

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Fox News Forge Anti-Labour Party Screed (1/2)

Fox News Forge Anti-Labour Party Screed (1/2)

Fox News has recently directed an audacious and highly compassionate act of humanitarian interventionism towards the UK.

Yes; they have tried to (further?) discredit the Labour Party by concocting a document by Harold Wilson that appears to demonize his own party.

At first I thought they were attempting to deal the final coup-de-grace to an ailing social-democratic party that was not sufficiently politically correct for the Fox party line.

But then I realise that I had merely ended inadvertently concocting yet another far-left liberal media conspiracy theory. Actually, they were just being “fair and balanced.” Continue Reading

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Governor Haley Proposes Replacing Confederate Flag with Dukes of Hazzard Flag

Governor Haley Proposes Replacing Confederate Flag with Dukes of Hazzard Flag

Republican Governor Nikki Haley called for the removal of the Confederate flag in the capital of South Carolina Monday, after pressure from many who called the flag racist and divisive.

The pressure was mounting, after a white supremacist opened fire on an historic church in Charleston, killing nine black people.

Governor Haley earlier had defended the flag as a symbol of Southern pride and history, but as a compromise to remove it, she has proposed replacing it with another symbol of Southern pride, the flag from the 1970’s-80’s show, The Dukes of Hazzard. Continue Reading

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Alex Salmond: “PC Bigots Don’t Understand this here Culture of Mine.”

Alex Salmond: “PC Bigots Don’t Understand this here Culture of Mine.”

Widely respected political hipster and relentlessly-resentless SNP politician Alex Salmond has recently performed a valiant act of radical political performance theatre, with his “behave yourself, woman!”

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-politics/11653578/Alex-Salmond-must-urgently-apologise-for-his-unacceptable-sexism.html Continue Reading

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Posted in Human Interest, Politics0 Comments

Government Chemtrail Program Deemed a Success

Government Chemtrail Program Deemed a Success

US Government officials declared today that their government sponsored Chemtrail program, which is designed to make people more submissive to government authority, is a total success.

“People are more submissive now than at any time in history”, proudly declared US Defense Secretary Ashton Carter. “Voter turnout is down to 38%, fewer people are signing petitions or staging demonstrations and apathy reigns throughout the country! Our Chemtrail program has been a resounding success!”

Carter stated that the chemtrails contain aluminum nanoparticles and other chemicals that interact with the human brain causing people to be more submissive, more apathetic and generate an “I don’t give a fuck” attitude. This will be helpful to military authorities when martial law is declared.

“On the downside we are seeing more people with Alzheimer’s, cognitive dysfunction, Parkinson’s, ALS and other diseases. But for the sake of a free and happy America it’s worth it!” Carter stated.

Carter stated that Operation Jade Helm 15 is being carried out in Texas and other states to little resistance. Jade Helm 15 is the largest domestic military training “exercise” in United States history.

Joint Chief of Staff Chairman General Martin Dempsey praised the program. “Back in the 60s we had people smoking dope, having sex and protesting the war in Vietnam. With the chemtrail program we see none of that. We can carry out our formerly covert activities in the open and nobody gives a shit!”

Most people interviewed seemed to care little about the chemtrail program. “Yeah, no big whoop”, said NYC stockbroker Josh Carbonetti.

“I got better things to worry about”, said Brooklyn physics professor Peter Gruber.

“Does my hair look okay?” asked LA consultant Sheila Weinberg.

There is much more to this story but I have lost interest in writing any more.

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9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened – Part  4

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened – Part 4

9/12/2001 THE DAYS AFTER THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED (A serial book excerpt)

Previous installments –
After Flight 93 crashes into the White House on 9/11/2001 killing President Bush as was originally planned,
Dick Cheney, the Vice President, is taken to a secured location for protection.
From there he overseas the demolition of what remains of the Twin Towers. Continue Reading

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9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened – Part 3

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened – Part 3

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened

Prelude- On 9/11/2001 Flight 93 crashes into the White House as was originally planned. Dick Cheney, the Vice President, is taken to a secured location for protection.
– – – – – – – – – –

PART 3

The streets were quieting down. Traffic was a fraction of what it normally was. There was still the noise of everyday city life, but it was lessened, muted.

An apprehension lay in the air. The sky suddenly seemed much bigger now that one knew death could fly down from it. For the first time in two centuries a major attack had been launched on the bedrock of America and it had left major fractures in it. Continue Reading

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9/12/2001 – Part 2 (Conspiracy Theorists Actually Know This!)

9/12/2001 – Part 2 (Conspiracy Theorists Actually Know This!)

9/12/2001 – THE DAYS AFTER THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED (A serial book excerpt)

In Part 1 Flight 93 has accomplished its goal of smashing into the White House, apparently killing President George W. Bush. Secret Service men are now searching for Dick Cheney who is the new President by default.

– – – – – – – – – – –

PART 2

Dick Cheney was a very lucky man. The Fates seemed to favor him. He was at the east end of the White House, furthest from the impact point. He had been standing, immersed in the incoming news of planes hitting the World Trade Centers in Manhattan when the impact threw him against a wall of books, then to the ground. Continue Reading

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Prime Minister Disraeli: 7 Hilariously Cutting Putdowns

Prime Minister Disraeli: 7 Hilariously Cutting Putdowns

1. Civilization and Savage Witticisms

Benjamin Disraeli, the English Frankie Boyle, is quite possibly the most aristocratically flamboyant and cutting Prime Minister in UK history. With perfect comic timing, he sliced through the pompous pretensions of his opponents, like a knife through last month’s beef haslet.

He once parried the insult of the Irish Nationalist Daniel O’Connell by saying: Continue Reading

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Politics1 Comment

“But Immigration is Complex…” Uh-uh! Not so Fast!

“But Immigration is Complex…” Uh-uh! Not so Fast!

Coming up to the 2015 General Election, the inflammatory rhetoric of UKIP is a worrying feature of the complex political scene in the UK.

It’s always been complex, of course…

Well, we have had politicians who have expanded the suffrage and decriminalised homosexuality. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Politics, World News1 Comment

(The) News (Really) Bytes – April 2015

(The) News (Really) Bytes – April 2015

The Aurora Joker James Holmes trial finally begins three years after his attack at the premier of a new Batman movie that killed twelve people.

Could we just have Batman seal him up in a forgotten part of the Batcave and save us the expense of having to take care of him for the rest of his demented life?

Turkey, still denying the massacre of millions of Armenians 100 years ago, decides on the anniversary to celebrate instead their victory at Gallipoli in World War One instead. Continue Reading

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9/11/2001 – The Day After The Unimaginable Happened

9/11/2001 – The Day After The Unimaginable Happened

(A book serial excerpt)

What would have happened had events occurred differently on 9/11?

The aircraft nosed through the mid morning sky. Outside the fuselage it was a sleek bird jetting its way through the air, its wings leaving contrails over the Midwest landscape far below it. It made for a peaceful picture. Or at least from the outside it did.

The plane wobbled occasionally. Lesser experienced hands were at the helm. Still it sailed on majestically, the way it was designed to. Inside there had been a disturbance that could have altered all that, but it was settled now. It sailed onward towards its destination, a new one.

Shortly it came in sight of the metropolis that it sought and began its long descent. The radar was turned off; eyes alone would be controlling its flight at this point.

The low altitude of the plane gave it a magnificent view of the whole city. One could make out the famous landmarks if one knew what to look for. Obvious was the Potomac.

A careful eye could pick out the Lincoln Memorial, the Smithsonian , the Washington Monument.

Shortly the pilots saw their destination. They began a controlled dive. And a chant in a language that those within earshot would not have understand had they still been alive.

Their goal was right before them. The words from their mouths were prayerful and hushed. A moments breath later the plane tore into the White House which a second before had been such a beautiful, majestic building.

“News Update! September 11, 2001 – A fourth passenger airliner has crashed into the White House probably killing President George W. Bush and an as yet unknown number of staff and visitors there.

Flight 93, originally flying over the Midwest to San Francisco, veered back east, crashing intentionally into the center of the White House. All on board are assumed dead.

Witnesses say they saw the plane veer down, taking a low altitude over central D.C., then crash directly into the Presidential building. A huge explosion rocked the structure moments later and now a thick flume of smoke rises from it.

A few survivors managed to get out of the East and West Wings relatively unharmed, but badly shaken. The President, who was to have gone on a trip to Texas, had to cancel at the last minute and is known to have been in the White House at the time of the horrific crash.

It is believed that a terrorist group is responsible for the attack and that it is most likely the same group is responsible for the crashes at the World Trade Center and the Pentagon.”

To the astute security personnel left alive in the vicinity of the White House it was obvious that their head boss was dead. Security turned the situation over to the Secret Service, those who were left and still functional, to find their new leader and get him to safety.

The search began for Dick Cheney.

TO BE CONTINUED…

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Sarko in China: “Monsieur Jinping, Break Down This Wall!”

Sarko in China: “Monsieur Jinping, Break Down This Wall!”

Nicolas Sarkozy is universally renowned and respected as the man who single-handedly brought down the Berlin Wall, restored the constitutional liberties and privileges of “La République,” and ended forever the reign of jihadist terror in the entire “monde non civilisée.”

But his aura is slipping somewhat. France’s most genial, witty, charismatic, and talented “notable public figure” has upset the government of a leading nation.

Admittedly, as the Chinese Communist Party is not a straight-vanilla late-capitalist White Anglo Saxon corporatist legislative entity like France… Continue Reading

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Our Crowdfunded North Korea Movie is Chugging Along, but it Needs Your Help

Our Crowdfunded North Korea Movie is Chugging Along, but it Needs Your Help

Kim Jong-Un is reportedly flipping his shit since the wide release of “The Interview”, which even his most dastardly designs did nothing to diminish.

We’re about halfway done filming ours, and I must say, it… looks… amazing. “The Interview” was pure Hollywood, but ours aims to really take the piss out of him and his absurd hermit kingdom.

Here is a pre-pre-trailer to show you what we’ve got so far, but if you scroll down far enough and read things close enough, you’ll get to see an actual clip from the movie to show you what we’re doing. Continue Reading

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Posted in Internets Tubes, Politics, Video News7 Comments

The Convenience of Misogyny? Kerry, Clinton, the White-Knight-Industrial Complex (2/2)

The Convenience of Misogyny? Kerry, Clinton, the White-Knight-Industrial Complex (2/2)

Continuing what I said yesterday about about John Kerry’s ethically problematic text on war rape and its pro-“Humanity” implications…

Of course, there is fierce market competition among the The Party of Humanity, rather as there are among all religious cults, sects, and militant creeds in general.

But of course, what unifies each of these Communities of (Absolute) Truth is a tendency to diminish and trivialize the suffering of individuals. Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, Serious Commentary1 Comment

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