Can Fish & Man Live in Peace?! George Bush Caught Up in Appalling Swimming Costume Drama…


In a comical oversight, Ex-President of the United States George Bush forgot to take his swimming costume with him at Washington’s renowned Sports & Leisure Village. Read more Can Fish & Man Live in Peace?! George Bush Caught Up in Appalling Swimming Costume Drama…

Share

Trump Unsure Why “Crime” is Actually a Crime

President select Donald Trump has admitted to obstruction of justice and collusion, both of which are crimes, but asked Sean Hannity in a phone interview, “Why are those crimes? I mean, nothing else I do is a crime.” Read more Trump Unsure Why “Crime” is Actually a Crime

Share

Jimmy Fallon Slobbers on Guests while Serial Killer Stabs his Audience to Death

Dateline: NEW YORK CITY—Jimmy Fallon, host of The Tonight Show, played softball with his guests while a serial killer crept through the studio, killing the members of the live audience one by one as they applauded the antics of the family-friendly host and comedian. Read more Jimmy Fallon Slobbers on Guests while Serial Killer Stabs his Audience to Death

Share

Documentary examines Movie Star’s Reluctance to Play God

Dateline: CANNES—A behind-the-scenes documentary about the life of world-renowned actor Johnny Hazitall has perplexed viewers, as experts in the film scramble to explain how anyone worshipped by hundreds of millions of fans could be so ungrateful as to avoid the pitfalls of celebrity.

On the silver screen Mr. Hazitall has appeared in dramas as well as comedic and action roles, and is mobbed by adoring fans wherever he goes.
Read more Documentary examines Movie Star’s Reluctance to Play God

Share

3rd Preview of Bobby-Joe The Movie (Exclusive)

Preview of the upcoming “How Bobby Joe REALLY Do” Documentary. This is the third preview, but the first with more characters included.

Let me know what you think, guys!

Yes, it’s still rough. It has yet to be color corrected or audio balanced, but this should give you a tiny of taste of what’s in store… and hopefully in a good way.

It’s pre-distribution, so ladies and gents, make yer fat ol’ offers now before the bidding gets too high! Oh, am I being unduly optimistic? Or am I just trying to fill column inches so it looks right. You tell me, my friend. Read more 3rd Preview of Bobby-Joe The Movie (Exclusive)

Share

Jack Black Shows Off New Investment at Furry Convention

SANTA MONICA, CA – Although it’s been quite some time since we last saw Jack Black in a memorable Hollywood role, it doesn’t mean the popular actor, comedian, cat lover, producer and singer hasn’t kept busy.

Indeed, just this past weekend, Black was in the public eye attending the Furry Convention on the world-famous Santa Monica Pier, overlooking the Pacific Ocean.

Crazed maniacs dressed in animal-like costumes from all over the world attended the fuzzy-themed show that has been held annually since 1992, but Black had a special reason for being there, to announce his recent investment in the popular entertainment website – It’s A Cat, Just So You Know, Entertainment (www.itsacatentertainment.com). Read more Jack Black Shows Off New Investment at Furry Convention

Share

Untalented Richard Gere Wannabe Quits Pretentious Hollywood Advocacy Movie

Bill Maher recent welcomed the somewhat-far-from-non-unknown actor Waldo Williams to a heated debate.

Williams was to serve as a leading character in a patronizing, sub-Richard Gere, thinly-veiled political advocacy movie from Hollywood, entitled:

Spiritual Xinjiang: The Steppe Fox Howls.

But after a few day of filming this sanctimonious puff-piece about this majority-Muslim area of the People’s Republic of China, Williams said: Read more Untalented Richard Gere Wannabe Quits Pretentious Hollywood Advocacy Movie

Share

Madonna & Lady Gaga’s New Cult is Too Much, Even for Progressives

Madonna and Lady Gaga, frustrated at Pope Francis’ apparent failure to make headway against conservative cardinals, have decided to form their own Church, in order to restore the true authentic meaning of Catholicism.

The One True Catholic Church of the All Holy Spirit of Our Universal Cosmic Mother, or OTCCOTAHSOOUCM for short, is not a new invention, but the original version of Catholicism that the real Jesus actually taught. Read more Madonna & Lady Gaga’s New Cult is Too Much, Even for Progressives

Share

Justin Bieber to Replace AC/DC’s Phil Rudd

AC/DC’s Phil Rudd is currently under house arrest for drug related criminal incidents. But it seems unlikely his fellow moshers will be keeping a seat warm for him.

Justin Bieber’s stellar solo career is about to come to an end! But don’t cry, things are going to get even better for the music scene. Justin Bieber is going to become the new chief singer of AC/DC! Not only that: lead singer Brian Johnson is about to step down.

Oh, my gosh!

Gushes Brian: Read more Justin Bieber to Replace AC/DC’s Phil Rudd

Share

World’s Most Beloved Dead Body Dies

Bobby “Stock Still” Jenkins, arguably the world’s most well-known dead body, has died at the age of 62. “When I found him lying face down in his breakfast, I just thought he was doing it again. Pretending to be dead when he really wasn’t,” Mrs. Grace Jenkins, Bobby’s wife of 35 years said. “I’m still not absolutely sure, but he’s been in the ground three days now and nothing yet.” Read more World’s Most Beloved Dead Body Dies

Share

Breaking News: Woman Claims Trump Didn’t Grope Her

A woman from Broken Springs, Michigan has come forward to insist that Donald Trump has not groped her, despite many opportunities to do so. Allison McGregor, a 47-year-old housekeeper who used to work at Trump’s Mar-o Lago hotel/resort in Florida, told Fox News today that the real estate broker used to visit the hotel at least once a week and on exactly zero occasions did he sexually assault her. Read more Breaking News: Woman Claims Trump Didn’t Grope Her

Share

Crack Bagans? Ghost Stalker Pushes Beloved Mask, Ford Ranger Off Cliff

MOUNT CHARLESTON, NV – Only hours before the series finale of his newest show Deadly Possessions was set to air, ghost hunting guru Zak Bagans could be found about 50 miles northwest of his Las Vegas museum; committing an act so unbaganslike that officials assume he was either under the influence of a mind altering substance or possessed by one of the spirits he has been molesting for so long.

Standing on the edge of a peak known as Masking Heights, elevated 9,281 feet above a rocky gorge, Bagans first tossed his beloved air mask over the edge before pushing his iconic, red 2012 Ford Ranger over and watching them both fall to their certain deaths.

In addition to the drug and possession theories, many have speculated that Bagans may be under an enormous amount of stress after a dismal first season in which he fulfilled his lifelong dream of opening a museum in downtown Las Vegas, filled with haunted and cursed objects he has collected through the years. The sixth episode in the first season is set to air on the Travel Channel tonight at 9:00pm est featuring objects that belonged to the deadly Dr. Jack Kevorkian and the late actress, Natalie Wood.

“The sheer hatred he showed towards that mask when throwing and then watching it fall to a horrible death… I’ve never seen that kind of sheer hatred before,” said park ranger, Jared Bulgovich, the sole witness of the ghastly act that has the ghost community shaken. “Everyone round these parts knows Mr. Bagans loves his air mask and is as shocked as I am!” Bulgovich added.

The co-host of the popular paranormal show Ghost Adventures, which has been on the air for 12 seasons, frequently gets criticized by viewers for over-wearing a protective mask with the intention of cleansing the air he breathes. Certain situations, such as cave and old basement investigations, require the use of such a device; but when Bagans began wearing his mask all the time, questions immediately arose. Since then, he has interrupted a wedding to proclaim love to his mask and even a performance of the musical Cats, further progressing his maskness.

While the previous events seemed to be a mere infatuation of a man in love with a poly bi-carbonate plastic mold, the most recent event tells a tale of a man in need of some serious help.

No charges have been filed yet as Bagans has received comfort from close friends, relatives and the many spirits he has connected with over the years.

Share

Interview: Katie Hopkins Educates Me on ‘Disrespectful Behaviour’

Some time ago, I posted on my Wallace Runnymede blog the following piece:

London’s Drone-Happy Cockroach Caucus Loses Its Shit (But not its Bullshit)

The “Foreign Office” in London (formerly known as Airstrip One’s Ministry for Eternal War) has recently moralistically condemned the Russian government which (according to the IntCom/ComHum party line), has “no justification” (sic) for deciding who can or cannot enter the country.

Nick Clegg can’t enter Russia? It’s political correctness gone mad, innit! It weren’t like that in the old days, mate. Read more Interview: Katie Hopkins Educates Me on ‘Disrespectful Behaviour’

Share