The 10 Commandments As Rewritten by ISIS.

What might be surprising to many is that the Muslim religion actually considers the Bible to be a Holy book and a source of prophecy. However, the more extreme elements of Mohammedanism have rewritten certain famous aspects of the Old Testament to better reflect their version of Islam. For instance, take a look at how they commandeered the 10 Commandments-

The Ten Commandment as originally written in the Bible:

I am the Lord thy god.
1.- Ye shall have no other gods before me.
2.- Ye shall have no other graven images or likenesses.
3.- Ye shall not take the Lord’s name in vain.
4.- Remember the Sabbath Day.
5.- Honor thy father and thy mother.
6.-Thou shalt not kill.
7.- Thou shalt not commit adultery.
8.- Thou shalt not steal.
9.- Thou shalt not bear false witness (lie).
10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors belongings.

The Ten Commandments as re-written by ISIS:

We are the Lords over you whether you like it or not.

1.- No other gods- we will slay them and you.

2.- No graven images or likenesses- we need to loot these to sell to collectors.

3- Do not take the Lord’s name in vain, or ours for that matter. Unless you like having your tongue cut out, of course.

4.-Remember the Sabbath day- We won’t be working that day but you have to since you are now our slaves.

5.- Honor thy father and thy mother- even if we did execute them.

6.- Thou shalt not kill us. But we can kill whoever we damn well please because we are holy men.

7.- You cannot commit adultery, but we will rape your sister in the name of Allah.

8.- Thou shalt not steal, but we need to finance our terrorism so for us it is OK.

9.-Thou shalt not bear false witness (lie), but the only lie we do is believing we are doing the will of God.

10.- Thou shalt not covet whatever you want but it is OK for us to steal because we are the chosen Ones and all else are infidels, even the Muslims who fight against us. Therefore it is OK for us to take anything we want.

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Fools’ God: A Rant by Rashad the Cackler

[The homeless old man, Rashad the Cackler is back with another rant. Enjoy as he spills his guts to passersby on a big city, American street corner.]

Laugh at the homeless wreck of a man who stands before you! Wrinkle your nose in disgust at the rags I wear, coated as they are in weeks-old urine, vomit and body odour. Mock me for my failure to lie for a living in your warped rat race. Here I am with no family to weigh me down or bind me to your monstrous society. Look at me and see the outsider, the scapegoat hurled into the wilderness who survives the void and returns to you with unpleasant news.
Read more Fools’ God: A Rant by Rashad the Cackler

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Obituary: Batshit Crazy Creationist Lunatic Kent Hovind Dies From Electrocution!

Yesterday, 15 October 2018, universally renowned and admired Young Earth Creationist Kent “Dr Dino” died in prison.

Best known for his bizarre ‘unicorn’ rants, based on a highly innovative ‘creative interpretation’ of Job 39.9, Hovind later fell from grace; convicted as a common felon, or some would say, a tax evader… er, protester!

Will the unicorn be willing to asserve thee (sic!), or abide by thy crib?

Poor old Kent is now making up his lonesome crib in hellfire; or if not that, at least one of the wilder, more wackadoodliest echelons of the $cientologist Hubbosphere!

Watch out for them goddamn freight trains, Kent!

But what actually happened?! Read more Obituary: Batshit Crazy Creationist Lunatic Kent Hovind Dies From Electrocution!

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Northern Bible II: The Wackiest Ancient Israel Headlines from the Pre-Zionist Media!


Judas Finally Sells out to Rupert Murdoch, Becomes Useful Idiot

Josiah Mulls Including Torah Trigger Warnings for Gory Content: Court Conservatives Plot to Overthrow Radical ‘Snowflake Princelings’

King Solomon Regresses to Radical Pomo Nihilism: Theological Diversity is Our Greatest Strength!

OMG! Irresponsible Jerusalem King/Twitter Troll has Trigger Finger on Middle East’s Largest Arrow Silo Read more Northern Bible II: The Wackiest Ancient Israel Headlines from the Pre-Zionist Media!

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Another Confidential Leak from the CIA Hymnbook (X): “And Can it Be?”

The renowned hymn writer Charles Wesley was the brother of the famous evangelist John Wesley. However, the mighty values and spirit that drove these men is not to be found among today’s establishment. Here is another confidential leak from the Satanic Hymnbook of the CIA.
(Psst… Nothing to do with Wikileaks!) Read more Another Confidential Leak from the CIA Hymnbook (X): “And Can it Be?”

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