Archive | Society

Breadfeeding: What You Need To Know

Breadfeeding: What You Need To Know

All across America, parents and their newborns have been latching onto the breadfeeding craze by using an excavated recipe from the ruins of the now extinct restaurant chain, the Olive Garden.

Many are being cautious with the new formula as they are supplementing their current nutritional plans with the fattening butter and garlic recipe made famous by Olive Garden’s once refillable breadstick baskets that came complimentary with the purchase of any entrée or as part of the soup, salad and breadstick option that was only available for lunchtime dining. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Society0 Comments

Belfast Residents Finally Break Silence on 12th of July Nick Minaj Insult

Belfast Residents Finally Break Silence on 12th of July Nick Minaj Insult

Belfast residents have finally made their feelings known (as people up North undoubtedly do best) regarding a little-known sectarian atrocity from the most recent 12th of July…

When a loyalist flute band surrounded a Catholic youth club and started playing Nicki Minaj (!)

An official apology stated:

It was not actually our intention™ to play that there song, but us can appreciate that the young people might’ee thought we did. Our original intention was to play Beyoncé’s “Crazy in Love,” because we wanted to make a good cross-community gesture™; I mean, everybody loves Beyoncé; that’s not a Prod or a Catholic thing, aye? Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Crime, Music, Religionism0 Comments

Gambling Classes to be Added to School Curriculum in 5 Different States

Gambling Classes to be Added to School Curriculum in 5 Different States

Stop complaining that school doesn’t prepare you for real life.

“The Real World, Real Skills Bill” has finally passed through the senate — adding gambling classes to the core curriculum of five states. The teachers are abuzz, students are excited and parents are desperately trying to figure out how they, themselves, can enroll. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Education, Kidz Zone0 Comments

Wahhabis, Southern Baptists Ban Side-boob; Episcopalians Undecided

Wahhabis, Southern Baptists Ban Side-boob; Episcopalians Undecided

Love ‘em or hate ‘em; but like death, taxes, and embarrassingly contrived and preposterous MSNBC op-eds, side-boobs are here to stay.

Yup: never mind bitterly warring and counter-warring and counter-counter-counter-owch-a-doodle-warring Social Justice Warriors on Tumblr; or Hamilton Nolan’s online privilege Olympics on Gawker.

Nah! There is only one web phenomenon sexually frustrated late-teenage and early-adult web users just can’t get enough of… side-boob.

But not everybody is down with the latest web phenomenon. For one, a fatwa from prominent Wahhabi cleric and respected intercultural communicator Patrick “Ginger” McCarthy Goodman Ibn Taymiyya, informs us:

“No good woman would even contemplate indulging in such an ungodly and depraved practice. I mean, look at my wife… well, actually you’d bloody well better NOT! Or I’ll stone the living crap out of you and everyone you know; whether known carnally or by mere pious acquaintance! … Anyway, MY wife would NEVER do that.”

Unfortunately, as regards the oh-so maliciously quote-mined fatwa above, 500 million Tumblr followers (nightly rising) (SIC!) disagree with his most exalted godliness’s statement … well, at least the bit about his wife, anyway.

(Thanks to my anonymous source, Brian K. White from Glossynews, for at least one small part of the information given above).

And the Southern Baptist Convention have shown some inter-Abrahamic solidarity, thus honoring Professor Emeritus Pat Buchanan’s famous historical hypothesis of a common Judeo-Christian-Islamic civilization stretching right from Ancient Greece and 18th century America up to the entire 7th century Middle East (and counting), with the following words:

“This one time, the Wahhabis are right. Side-boob is wicked. The Apostle tells us the Devil and wicked people are always inventing new things. You know, like microwave ovens, depraved faith-based pseudo-scientific superstitions like Darwinianism and vaccine science, wind energy (how the hell can a mere breeze provide enough energy to power a TV? You’ve got to be kidding me? They just turn the sound off to save power or what?)”

(As we live in an increasingly litigious society, I should probably point out that when I said the Southern Baptist Convention, I ACTUALLY meant the Southern Baptist Convention of Topeka, Kansas; sorry if anyone got confused and worried, and started anxiously fiddling with the crotch of their lawyer).

Still, Episcopalians are currently lacking consensus on this crucial and all-important issue™. One Despairing-True-Believer-Who Has-Had-it-up-to-Here-With-Liberal-Compromises™ educated me as follows:

Look, when they started having women priests, I thought nothing of it; well, not much; within reason, you known. Just went and smashed up a few phone boxes… well, and the odd hobo or two… well, within reason. And… gay priests? I could just about put up with it… well, with a wee bit of anger management, hours upon hours of tantric yoga mutual circle-jerking, and inevitably, popping a crapload of barbiturates 24/7.

But side-boob? This is the absolute Devil’s work, and no-one in our church has condemned it! I mean, there’s no way in hell I can stay in such a cesspool of unadulterated ecclesiastical depravity™ a moment longer!…

Actually, do you know any religions I could join which make a principled stand against side-boob?… Scientology, maybe? I hear these guys have an opinion about absolutely everything; and they don’t just bend over, kneel down, turn around and change their minds whenever someone contradicts them! Well,if THAT’S so, then they must REALLY know the truth!

On the other hand, one female priest told me:

This debate is getting way out of proportion. Most Christian authorities have opposed homosexuality and abortion, until relatively recently; the majority probably still do. And so you get dogmatically entrenched and violent fanatics on either side quoting verses and authorities to each other, roaring and screaming and attempting to prove who has The Absolute Truth™ and What The Supreme Authority ACTUALLY meant™; kinda like World of Warcraft web forums, huh?

Well, the sole exception is those Pentecostal snake-charmers, who don’t cite the Bible, but shove their ‘Private Revelations from the Lord™’ in my face. I mean, those jerks are just pretentious, self-important losers who annoy the hell out of me.

I mean, I don’t know why anyone, at any point in history, would choose to follow some devious charlatan who claimed God was speaking to THEM PERSONALLY. I mean, seriously? You’ve got to be kidding me!

BUT… as distinguished from homosexuality and abortion, there is NOTHING… absolutely NOTHING in the Bible about side-boob. I mean, I know us people on the Left Wing of the Church always say that… but this time, I REALLY mean it!™

Hmm… what do I think? Well, I can imagine an all-knowing Creator of the Universe having an opinion on war; abortion (perhaps particularly with regards to sex-selective, racially selective, disability-selective etc)… the persistence of deeply-ingrained social prejudices; narcotic abuse; not to mention selfish men who can’t keep their dick in their pants, and who decide to cut and run when their girlfriend becomes pregnant…

But when it comes to side-boob, I think he’s got better things to worry about. I mean, I think some of these guys are over-thinking these things. But then, what the Hell would I know?…

Hey, quit it! Didn’t I tell you to stop touching that lawyer!

Share

Posted in Religionism, Strange People0 Comments

David Duke “Clarifies” Anti-Semitic Comments

David Duke “Clarifies” Anti-Semitic Comments

Famously-allegedly-ish “non-racist™” White supremacist; oh sorry, how un-PC; I meant achingly conspicuous “racial realist™” David Duke has popped out (sorry, popped up) once again.

Yes, His Most Exalted Ideological Hipsterness has recently expressed what he calls his “utmost sincere contrition and regret” for a despicable comment he made in a TV interview.

Surprising, huh? Well, kein Scheisse!…

Fox TV viewers were horrified to hear The Most Hazardous Duke Of All™ speak of New York as “Jew York City.”

Well, I say horrified; others were overjoyed, such as the Hardcore-Leftie-Euroweenie/BDSM-Campaign-loving-overgrown/undergrown-student-activist/SJW-Fox-viewing-contingent.

Still, upon Bill O’Reilly roaring at him that choice of words was an extremely offensive right-wing microaggression and obviously racist, Duke appeared visibly shaken and almost at the point of tears.

Admittedly, this might have been more to do with getting a severe hard-left verbal pounding from Bill-O than with any sincere recognition of his own wrongdoing.

Still, the flamboyantly callous, former Exalted-Kexalted-Decepticon-Klepticon™ of the KKK has since “explained” and “apologized” in what reads (at least to his ubiquitous and irritatingly PC haters™, as the Man-from-the-Klan calls them) as a surprisingly flustered, rambling, and incoherent statement:

I am absolutely overcome with the sincerest and utmost remorse for my inexcusable and thoughtless words, and do so very humbly beg forgiveness from my fellow Americans who are Jewish, and who are also my beloved compatriots.

Yes, I am trained as a scholar, my name is DOCTOR David Duke™, remember the first of these three words, oh do ye remember them, my brethren!

Why a scholar? Huh? Yeah yeah yeah, well, this is really relevant, I mean you ought to know that all my writings are based on my mind making quick-fire connections between this and that…

Highly relevant, yeah, because I am afraid that when I made my somewhat insensitive or careless comments (albeit ones maliciously and deviously distorted by malign subaltern forces that I shall not name in this context), I inexcusably let my guard down; only because I had my sociologist hat on.

Yes, brothers and sisters: that is the connection I want your brain to make, don’t worry about plausibility or coherence, just make the connection. Yaa… ooga-booga-OOOOOOOOO-wap-pap-pop! KAK-KAK-KAK-KLEPZ-ZOOBA-KLAK, OI! Three times is charmed!…

Anyway, witchery aside, when I said the words maliciously and falsely attributed to me by the highly regulated, bureaucratically encumbered, and excessively-non-autonomous-and-subjectively-manipulated mainstream media™…

Well, I merely intended to make a purely objective, value-free, positivistic, demographic observation™. I mean, there’s a lot of Jewish people living in New York, right? That’s what I was trying to say, that’s all…

I mean, I actually love the Jews™! I’m no bigot, because I have the complete works of Bob Dylan™; all 580 discs! How many so-called “pro-Jewish Americans” can say that?

Oh and by the way, in case you were wondering, I just love Leonard Cohen. He’s made a simply astonishing contribution to our common cultural prosperity…

His melodies convey a poignant reminder that we are but dust, mere strangers passing through a desert land not our home; casting a tender sheen of ambiguity and long-forgotten memories over the fountainous bower of Our Common Humanity.

But Cohen himself retorts:

“Oh, sure! That old canard again about his music collection. So predictable! I mean, it will take more than a few dusty music LPs to prove that this man is not a bigot. He’s a symbol of hatred. And I bet you my very last Marianne that he can’t sing for shit.”

I concoct a transcript of Cohen’s side of the rap-off, and bring it to His Most Exalted Vanillaness. He appears unimpressed, as he glumly toys with his organic, low-fat frozen yoghurt…:

“Ok, well, maybe I don’t like that Cohen boy so much after all. Haters gonna hate. But Bob Dylan is still my favourite singer of all.”

Wowee!… Nothing like shifting the goalposts, huh Dave?

Share

Posted in Politics, Strange People0 Comments

Kim Jong Takes Un Step Toward Hollywood

Kim Jong Takes Un Step Toward Hollywood

TO: My dear subjects

FROM: Your Supreme Leader, Kim Jong-un

I want to apologize for not informing you of my whereabouts for almost six weeks this past fall and causing you undue heartache and concern but, of course, I cannot.

As I am infallible, apology is not an option for me and I must therefore gently chide you, my children, for needlessly worrying about my brief absence. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Strange People, World News1 Comment

Local Police New Alpha Codes Fluster Criminals, Officers

Local Police New Alpha Codes Fluster Criminals, Officers

Auburn police have found a new way to keep criminals from understanding their scanner chatter for ill, but unfortunately, not one of them has yet figured out how to use it for good.

The new alpha call signs, dubbed Cool Island Breeze, has proved to be anything but cool.

The alphabet, relying heavily on words starting with sounds other than those represented by their first letters, has faced dire criticism from patrolmen in the department. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Crime1 Comment

7 Best & Worst Halloween Tricks, Treats

7 Best & Worst Halloween Tricks, Treats

With good ol’ Saint Hallow’s Eve fast approaching, it’s time to think about the trick and/or treaters who will soon be knocking on your door fresh-faced and pre-diabetic.

You can make a ton of friends by handing out full-sized candy bars or silver dollars, but that adds up quickly and it still won’t spare your house from egging. Not being a Phys Ed teacher is usually enough to ensure that.

So what are the best & worst things to give out this Halloween? It may surprise you but the best and worst are one and the same. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Human Interest, Kidz Zone0 Comments

Ailing John Kerry Combats Mainstream Logic

Ailing John Kerry Combats Mainstream Logic

The entire International Community™ (all ten or so individuals!) have been suddenly cast adrift without guidance and enlightenment…

No, it’s not, as you mighta thought, that Fox’s Glenn Beck and his MSNBC haters have hung up their microphones, leaving the entire global policy world in eternal darkness.

Nah! It’s just that John Kerry is taking a reasonably adequate break™; he’s currently in recovery from severe brain-fry. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Education, Politics0 Comments

God Finds Message from All Humanity in Cucumber, Fanatics Outraged

God Finds Message from All Humanity in Cucumber, Fanatics Outraged

It’s often asserted that messages from God can appear in mysterious places…

You know, the Madonna popping up in cheese sandwiches, Lady Gaga helping us see the light, Bible/Quran/Dianetics texts being found in the veins of tomatoes…

Although admittedly, the more fastidious believers tend to have violently assertive theological disagreements™ about which God is sending out the messages..

And, needless to say, about which messages (on the contrary) are forgeries by misguided and unenlightened rival believers™.

However, the other day, the roles were reversed. When slicing up a cucumber for a nice, pleasant Eternal-Sunday Lunch, God was at first shocked, and then intrigued, to see a message from All Humanity, cunningly concealed within the vegetable.

The message reads as follows:

Some of us have just had it up to here with some of your followers. We don’t mind people following you, but there is a hardcore contingent of your people who are really messing things up for us. Please would you just get these people off our backs?

At first, God was wary of this:

My first thought was, hmmmm…. A message from All Humanity concealed within a cucumber? That’s ridiculous. It must be a coincidence. Am I risking falling into confirmation bias, or something? I was pretty sceptical about it; you know, an omniscient being can’t merely accept just anything as true, merely because it sounds plausible.

So… the three of us (well, technically speaking, the one of us ) conferred together, and we were sceptical at first. But in the end, We agreed to make a statement clarifying My position.

Well, we wish to make it clear that anyone who wishes to follow Us is free to do so. Anyone who doesn’t, should be left alone. I am The Truth, and I actually value integrity and honesty from the individuals who are of my own Creation, rather than blind subservience.

However, a Joint Solidarity Statement, signed by various Megachurch Pastors, Ayatollahs, Hardcore Catholics, Ultra-Orthodox Jews, Hindutva Fundamentalists, and various assorted Circle-Jerking True Believers™ informs us:

“This is self-evidently a fake. You shouldn’t believe everything you hear about God, just because the person speaking is somehow slick and genial; or even because he threatens you with eternal hellfire if you don’t believe him.”

Well… can’t argue with you there. Still, I just wish everybody in this world knew that.

Share

Posted in Religionism0 Comments

Busy Tech Execs Boost Productivity, Put Children On Ice

Busy Tech Execs Boost Productivity, Put Children On Ice

When LaShonda Martinez’s boss first offered to freeze her three-year-old son, the programmer was aghast. “I was all like, you want to do what? But then, once they explained themselves, I was all like, yeah, maybe.”

In light of recent benefits offered by tech giants Google and Facebook to freeze employees embryos, Washington-based Microsoft revealed that not only had they a similar policy in place, but that they would actually place already born babies and toddlers into suspended animation as to not interfere with their employee’s workloads. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Biz News, Health0 Comments

Rep/Dem Hawks Approve “Moderate Islamist” Manifesto

Rep/Dem Hawks Approve “Moderate Islamist” Manifesto

Frustrated by what they perceive to be the dogmatism both of liberal or secular Muslims on the one hand, and hardcore political Islamists on the other, various factions of moderate political Islamism™ have released a joint solidarity statement.

The statement has met with widespread acclaim among UK Trotskyites, as well as moderate political Islamists themselves,..

Well, the latter are happy that a certain proportion of the Left are continuing to show solidarity in their eternal struggle against the public/private distinction, capitalism, and individual liberty.

Signatories (so far) include Erdogan and his party, the moderate dissidents in Syria, George Galloway’s Respect Party, and the Moderate Taliban™ (remember these guys?)

The statement runs as follows:

1. Islam is the only foundation of the state. No other political or religious ideologies may be permitted to exist within a moderate political Islamist state. This is absolutely non-negotiable, and anyone who raises the slightest objection is to be immediately liquidated, in the most brutal and savage manner possible.

2. Secular and liberal Muslims claim that gay people should be free from police persecution, and should have a wide array of civil liberties. God forbid! On the other hand, hardcore political Islamists wish to behead and stone homosexuals. This is also unacceptable.

A moderate political Islamist state will avoid both extremes, and merely give all homosexuals a life sentence, and ensure that none of their family members may attend university, or be permitted to serve in any political, police or military function.

3. Secular and liberal Muslims claim that what a woman does with her own vagina is her own damn business. God forbid! On the other hand, hardcore political Islamists wish to execute unchaste women in the most horrendous manner possible. This is also unacceptable.

A moderate political Islamist state will avoid both extremes, and merely beat these women in public, so that they will be forced to reflect on their depravity. Yet, offenders who repeatedly refuse to turn from the errors of their ways will be given a life sentence. (Please note how we are more lenient on our women than on homosexuals; women have tender feelings, and we must pity those who go astray).

4. Secular and liberal Muslims claim that full religious toleration and equality must be provided to Jews, Christians, and all the even more small and insignificant religious minorities, who are not worth mentioning here, and who in any case are not mentioned in the Quran. God forbid! On the other hand, hardcore political Islamists wish to liquidate anyone who does not accept Islam. This is also unacceptable.

A moderate political Islamist state will avoid both extremes, and thus we will permit non-Muslims to survive, provided they pay the jizya, and refrain from criticising Islam or committing any form of blasphemy whatsoever. Those who do presume to do so will be liquidated; but anyone who respects Islam may live. We must also ensure that those who do not convert to Islam are prevented from attaining high positions in the government, media, academic, police or military spheres.

Top Democratic and Republican warhawks are impressed with this statement. One Saviour of Our Common Humanity™ from one of the two main parties or other told me:

“You know, this is what we were hoping for all along. Now that we know who the real moderate defenders of freedom and liberty are, we can keep on fighting the REAL terrorists, like ISIS.”

And some guy from that other stupid party, whatever it’s called, said:

“Well, this will buy us a bit of time. We can approve this statement in public first; then, once we have dealt with ISIS, we can turn on the moderate political Islamists; you know, like we did with the Taliban and Saddam.”

Finally, Robert Fisk was unavailable for comment, as he was writing a tearful Tumblr post about the sad, sad, weepy world in which we live, and why can’t we all just live together in love and peace and acceptance.

Share

Posted in Politics, Religionism0 Comments

“Patronising Liberal Pastor” Calls Jesus “Inspiring”

“Patronising Liberal Pastor” Calls Jesus “Inspiring”

Last time, I reminded you how much a certain kind of patronising crap about “inspirational” underdogs and under-non-dogs is now big business.

Well, now it’s even infected kinda-normal-and-sensible-within-reason religious circles™.

That’s right; worshipers at a somewhat moderate/mainline Church™ in Colorado Springs (no, not Brother Ted’s church, we’re talking one with an monthly income that is only in the mere hundreds of thousands)…

Yes, worshipers were absolutely horrified to hear a shocking sermon from their new flaming hippy, pinko liberal compromisin’ pastor™.

Well; if ever anyone in our world has even been an inspiration to the weak, the disenfranchised, the suffering; it was, and is, and always will be, Jesus Christ…. I mean, he was the ultimate subaltern figure… despised and rejected, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief…. You know, we’re talking wayyy beyond Charlie Sheen level here.

And Jesus, our inspiration, wants us all to follow his lead. Let us all be inspired by this man, for he is the most inspiring of all. Peace be upon him. We should all be respectful People of the Book; in the spirit of Christian tolerance, let us feel unashamed, un-insulted and entirely unpatronised and un-condescended-to, in our bearing such a noble title…

Yes, People of the Book, a beautiful name, unilaterally and benevolently bestowed on us by those I deem to be our Brothers in Christ and in general Abrahamicnesses…

I now cite the Call to Prayer: Come to Prayer, come to success… be inspirational, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Quite understandably, worshippers were less than impressed with this pretty-damn-cheap-soundin’ imitation of sub-sub-standard cable-TV-sensationalism. One disgruntled former church member™ told me:

Ok, first of all, the sermon lasted well under 50 minutes; talk about being sold short! I wanted value for money; just this for $900 in the collection plate a week? You know, I’m a retired school teacher… I mean, this shit should be golden; just can’t give out this stuff for free, unless I get my money’s worth!

And, by the way, this is the most condescending idiocy I’ve ever heard since the Galatians that the Apostle Paul wrote about were messing about with backward Judaising MSM Zionist tomfoolery!

You know, Jesus called out the Pharisees at the risk of his very life, kinda like Mitt Romney at the Iowa convention (except Jesus wasn’t a Mormon, OBVIOUSLY); he told his enemies they were on the Highway to Hell if they didn’t shape up; he founded the “Occupy the House of God” campaign and turned the tables on the 1%er money changers; he even courageously descended into Hell and laid some serious WWE smackdown on His Satanic Majesty!

I mean, what’s all this about this liberal, gentle, meek-and-mild Jesus?™ Jesus was a fighter, a true warrior of God; he wasn’t afraid of anything or anyone. All this freaking pussy Democrat sentimentality about “inspiring Jesus…” It just makes me sick!

What next? I suppose this fake pastor is gonna tell me about his own secret confidential revelation from the Almighty™ that Jesus ran a free-range cat shelter, wore hippy-dippy flower-power Jesus sandals, and had his own socialist left-wing organic vegetable farm co-operative?

Or maybe he’s gonna tell me God is a liberal? Jesus was a Democrat? The apostles were Communist Revolutionaries? Uh-uh! You know, I am pretty sure God is FAIRLY right-leaning; well, you know, within reason.

It just reminds me of this trash on cheap low-subscription television networks about oh-so-INSPIRINGLY incontinent kids who, like, all of a sudden start talking at 6 years old…

Or about currently successful-ish and equally “inspiring” semi-millionaire businesswomen who were told they would never be able to leave the comfort of their own four walls without medical assistance!

You know, these liberal seminaries and pastors have a lot to answer for! This was what pushed me over the edge into atheism. I had a few doubts before, but this crappy liberal candyfloss pastor has just ruined everything, at long last!… Never mind all his Darwinian idiocy, it’s all his crap about gushy-wushy inspiring figures that finally turned me!

Oh and by the way, while we’re at it… what in the hell does “subaltern” mean? This is what I mean about crappy, pretentious university-trained pastors talking above us! That’s what comes of these professional pseudo-intellectual theological curricula; should’ve stuck with good old King James 1611!

Yup, you can tell him that to his face! Go on, bite me! He is literally worse than Hitler… sorry, really understated that; I mean, he’s literally worse than John Shelby Spong!

And why in the Hell was he quoting the Catholic “Call to prayer,” huh? What’s next? Baptism equality? He’s gonna start gay-baptising Christian gays? How about leather-clad lesbian worship music for all them there other kinda Christian gays? Seriously!

Fair enough. I came back to his most exalted preachiness with this helpful feedback:

“Shit! You’re friggin’ kidding me! This stupid ass-hat actually said that? This flaming hell-bound bastard clearly has some pretty damn freaky issues goin’ on! To hell with that crap!”

Hmm… not so meek and mild after all then?…

Share

Posted in Religionism0 Comments

Ruse of Young Border Crossers Successful for Drug Cartels

Ruse of Young Border Crossers Successful for Drug Cartels

Suspicions have arisen lately that the recent spate of Latin children coming across the southern U.S. border were no spontaneous occurrence. Darker implications have revealed themselves.

“The operation was a total success!” states Juan Cokefetcher, middle manager for the Headchoppers Cartel of Chihuahua.

“Those stupid gringos never did figure out what it was all about; that those kids coming across seeking asylum were just a ruse to distract them.” Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Crime, Human Interest0 Comments

Libraries- The Great Whores Of The Literary World

Libraries- The Great Whores Of The Literary World

There used to be a sanctuary to which you could retire for that most blessed and peaceful of soul satisfying balms- silence.

This sanctuary was known as a ‘library’ and throughout the world they could be considered a trustworthy and guarded haven for this treasure of peace whether it be in Bangladesh or the heart of Manhattan.

There entities known as “librarians” would covet and protect this precious jewel of quietude against all assailants be they obnoxious brats, overheated fine payers or homeless wrecks. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Education, Kidz Zone0 Comments

Pittsburgh: 3 So. Oakland Buildings Improved In Atwood Street Fire

Pittsburgh: 3 So. Oakland Buildings Improved In Atwood Street Fire

PITTSBURGH — The Pittsburgh Fire Department was called late last night to a three-alarm blaze on Atwood Street that, according to onlookers, “greatly improved at least three of the buildings.”

While the South Oakland inferno itself enveloped a swath containing only those three buildings, reports indicate that several adjacent structures also received partial upgrades from smoke damage. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Human Interest0 Comments

Page 1 of 8912345...102030...Last »
Glossy News Fake Commercials!


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Visit the “Old Version” of our Site

     
Still want more? Find thousands of buried satirical gems in our archives on the old version of Glossy News!

Check This Out!

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

10 posts
5 posts
3 posts
2 posts
1 post
1 post
1 post


All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial