New Pot Laws May Save/Destroy Education System in America
After seeing how much money Colorado made in just the first week of implementing its law allowing the use of recreational marijuana, New Hampshire is hurrying through legislation of its own with a vote scheduled today. With a hefty 25%…
Fashion Industry Schemes to Punish Men by Turning Women into Freaks
Dateline: LOS ANGELES — More and more consumers are aware that magazines hire Photoshop artists to doctor pictures of celebrities, as part of an elaborate ritual designed to appease the celebrities’ agents and to flatter the egocentric actresses so they’ll…
Video Game Makers Reach Around to Senior Citizens
As the video game industry continues to mature, game makers are scrambling to create the next generation of games designed specifically for a maturing demographics. You can give the older gamers a fancier avatar, but it’s a lot harder to…
Fifteen Things That Turned Obama’s Hair Grey
There are many factors within the fray, that have turned our Presidents hair to grey. Pundits, done-thats and patriots galore seek to sabotage him evermore… These are the things that have turned our fearless leader’s head from black to grey…
New Dogfish Head Brew a Blatz from the Past
Delaware based brewery Dogfish Head has released the newest in its Ancient Ale Series to mixed reviews. Dogfish Head first re-created Midas Touch from residue found on 2700 year old pottery fragments discovered in a tomb in Turkey. And after…
New Jersey Replaces Groundhog Day with Chris Christie Day
Trenton, New Jersey – Acknowledging the demand of its residents, New Jersey will become the first state to replace the once popular, February 2nd holiday, Groundhog Day, with what will now be known as Chris Christie Day, in honor of…
Dennis Rodman Found Drunk Face Down in Pyongyang Alley
PYONGYANG, N. KOREA – Dennis Rodman is alive and, at present, sober after being found face down in a small mud puddle in an alleyway adjacent to the Pyongyang stadium where he sang “Happy Birthday” to N. Korean leader Kim…
Miley Cyrus to Undergo Sex Change Operation
Twerking, gyrating, Wrecking Ball queen Mile Cyrus announced today that she is secretly a man and will be undergoing a sex-change operation at the end of July. “I have never felt comfortable as a woman”, Cyrus told reporters. “Guys just…
Freedom Industries Explores Its Freedom to Pollute W. Virginia Waterways
Freedom Industries, the more-important-than-humans industry conveniently located next to the major river supplying water to nine counties of a rural portion of West Virginia, has contaminated the drinking, bathing, teeth brushing, clothes washing water of thousands of people with a…
New Marijuana Laws Spur Highest Home Prices in Years
New numbers have come out in the housing sector, indicating that in the next year, the states of Washington and Colorado will have the highest number of home sales in the country. Some other states are not too far behind….