We Are A Fly On The Wall At An Early Meeting Of Trump’s Cabinet.

We Are A Fly On The Wall At An Early Meeting Of Trump’s Cabinet.

“OK, are we all here?” demanded the President Select as he rushed in fashionably late to his own White House staff meeting.

“Yes, Mr. President, all are present,” answered Kellyanne Conway for everyone.

“Good, good!” mumbled Trump as he busily pulled paperwork out of his attache case. Looking up and glancing around the room, he hushedly asked his Secret Service men, “Did this room get cleared for bugs? We can’t afford to get any fake news leaks started today.” Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Politics0 Comments

The Poetry Of Sarah Palin

The Poetry Of Sarah Palin

I SHOT AN ARROW

I shot an arrow
Into the air
It came down
And pegged a hare.
My rifle I shot so straight and true
And brought me down a caribou.
Moose when they see my trail they quake
Ptarmigan their feathers shake.
Full grown bears will turn and run
When they see my Remington.

The creatures know
I’m somewhat prone
To leave them dead,
Their brains out-blown.

To run, now some will not even bother,
They stand stock still, scared to the bone,
It’s because I’m the biggest Mother,
That their woods have ever known.

MIRROR, MIRROR

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Who’s the grandest of us all?
I’ve seduced McCain, become his Queen
And before the world am now seen.
My realm has grown from Alaska land
To encompass Maine to Rio Grande.
I’m so hot Ted Nugent wants to do me
And yet the Democrats eschew me.
I’m so hot the firemen douse me
When old men try to accost me.

I know now it’s all a game,
A strive for glory, power and fame.
Shake all hands and smile a lot,
Make sure chickens are in every pot.
But I will play a little dumb
And wait for my chance to come
And go hell bent for broke
Should ever the old geezer croak.

SOFUSTICATED

On me you must have pity,
I am not from the big city.
Sophistication is an art
I have not yet gart.
I’ve never had Chablis,
Modern art still eludes me.
But don’t you get rude,
Or even a little bit crude
Or I will show you some talent
From my side of the planet,
You’ll be field-dressed and gutted
And as a last touch- denutted.

————————————————
Said a young lass from Alaska
“If I want yer opinion I’ll ask ‘ya!”
A maverick she was
With justifiable cause
Her very own party
Had treated her farty
So she said, “If ‘ya screw me then I’ll blast ‘ya!”

Share

Posted in Politics0 Comments

What If The Governments of the World Were Run Like Game Shows? (2/2)

What If The Governments of the World Were Run Like Game Shows? (2/2)

TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES

 

Contestants will don the uniform of their countries secret police to torment detainees, both legitimate and innocent, for information.

The players will be judged on both the quality of the information acquired and the inventiveness of the techniques used to get that information. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Top Stories0 Comments

What If The Governments of the World Were Run Like Game Shows? (1/2)

What If The Governments of the World Were Run Like Game Shows? (1/2)

In many countries of the world the government is the sole producer of all television broadcasting.

They decide what will be aired, what will be written, who will star in what and who will be shot for making the wrong joke.

What if they just went a step further and ran the governments just like they were game shows (aren’t they anyway?)
Maybe the results would be something like this: Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Top Stories0 Comments

Do It Yourself Future News Headlines

Do It Yourself Future News Headlines

If you look at enough different newspapers enough different times you find things can be quite similar.

The rags always seem to be re-circulating the same type of newsworthy cadavers again and again.

The names and the places change, but the content is cloned.

It gets to the point where you can pretty much predict what the ‘new’ news will be about before it even becomes happens.

In fact, one might as well make up his own news- it won’t be that different from the real event! It never stopped our new Glorious Leader! Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc0 Comments

As Though You Haven’t Seen Enough Trump Trashing Already – Here Are More Trump Memes

As Though You Haven’t Seen Enough Trump Trashing Already – Here Are More Trump Memes

Repeat after me:

We got so many memes you’ll be sick of meme-ing.

Read the following memes.

We got so many memes you’ll be sick of meme-ing

Are you bored yet?

We got so many memes you’ll be sick of meme-ing.

 

 

Share

Posted in Politics, Top Stories0 Comments

Hair, the Rock Musical That Shook The World.

Hair, the Rock Musical That Shook The World.

It was almost 50 years ago that the rock opera ‘Hair’ first appeared on the scene in New York, just preceding the famous ‘Summer of Love’ of 1968.

Having humble beginnings, it played first in a disco way off Broadway, the actors greeting and ushering people in before performing. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Music0 Comments

Mosquitoes- The Mini-Mes Of Vampires

Mosquitoes- The Mini-Mes Of Vampires

Mosquitoes are evil little geniuses.

They are adept enough to fly up, whine in your ear, then take off laughing as you whip yourself in the head trying to swat them.

They know how to hold a victim in suspense as they flit about having the wiles to dodge the hand raised in self defense. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Health, Science0 Comments

Immigration- For Once I Actually Agree With Something Trump Says.

Immigration- For Once I Actually Agree With Something Trump Says.

Strange days indeed!- I actually agree with Trump on something.

First off, build that damn wall!!!!!

11 million Hispanics are living illegally in the U.S. and they have the cheek to insist that they are justified in doing so? Wrong! By sneaking across the border they have already shown that they have no respect for our laws by doing so. Are they going to respect the rest of the laws while they are here?

It is said that they are escaping poverty. Yes, but their countries were formed at the same time as ours and have abundant resources. Why are they not economically better off? Is is our fault they are poor?

Somewhat, yesl because we do tend to dominate the policies and the economies in this part of the world.

But a greater share of the reason would be that they have allowed themselves to be dominated by leaders and religions that tend towards repression and by domination by the landowners and the wealthy. Edward Abbey once said that we should send all illegals back to across the border but give them all a gun to cure the corrupt politics back home.

Temporarily restrict travel from seven Muslim countries who tend to have a lot of terrorists? Sounds sane to me! Give us some time to let muddy waters clear so we can make our homeland a little more safe. Quit yelling folks, it is a TEMPORARY ban, not permanent.

I wish as much yelling were made about the poverty in our own country with homelessness and working people not making enough to make the basics of life. The Sioux reservation in South Dakota is still the most poverty stricken district in the U.S. How about helping them to get the jobs that are going to immigrants?

The major reason we let in so many immigrants is that companies and businesses want a cheap source of labor. Remember- a bunch of guys got into the country on student visas and killed over 2,000 people by flying jets into buildings.

The ones shouting the loudest are the immigrants themselves (sorry, this really isn’t your country to begin with. Quit telling us what we are supposed to do with it). And, interestingly the tech industries. Gee, white collar geek guys, you are purposely hiring engineers and computer whizzes from foreign countries that use English as a business language because they will work cheaper than born in the USA people.

And now you are now pretending to be patriotic? It doesn’t fly, folks.

The protests have grown to be embarrassingly knee jerk and empty headed. It is mechanical to just go against everything our pseudo President-select says and does; that makes us just as bad as him. This same energy thrown into helping the ethnic groups already here would do wonders. We don’t need anymore people from elsewhere, at least for a while.

The various crisis’s in various countries are terrible but at some time people need to take care of their own problems. Running over here doesn’t solve them.

Too many think that the U.S., Canada and Europe are Shangri-La’s where everything is all rosy. It isn’t. The immigrants are usually shifted into the poorer neighborhoods where they have to fend for themselves. Their kids often join gangs of their own countrymen for protection and to get some of the financial circulation for themselves.

And how do they have to do it if they have no jobs? You know the answer already- drugs, theft, prostitution.

It used to be once upon a time that people did come over for genuine religious or freedom issues. Now for most it is because they see the U.S. as being one big bank where everyone is wealthy and has no troubles (although compared with some of the countries like Syria it is by comparison).

They want to tap into that bank.

They want a piece of the pie that they didn’t help bake.

We have enough people here already. More than enough.

A Chinese woman I knew managed to get out of mainland China and into Germany by agreeing to work as a computer technician on a stipend with free housing.

She left behind her child and husband to get out because she hated China so much. She did everything she could to stay there. When she mentioned she wouldn’t mind going to America too I told her that we had too many people already.

“No, America has lots of room!” she replied.

It does, if you compare it to China where they let their population explosion get away from them.

Too many times I have experienced foreigners pulling crap in this country. When I go to other countries I make it a point to be respectful and civil with the people there; a sentiment unfortunately ignored by many Americans I have seen go overseas. Many who come here see us as being fools or stupid and show no respect or regard what-so-ever.

Here are some examples I’ve experienced personally here in my own country to name just a few:

1. Being threatened by a large British man because he didn’t like it that I forbid alcohol consumption in a hostel I was running and didn’t let people run around wild like he thought I should.

2. At same hostel got punched in the eye by an anarchistic German who I was kicking out for being a jerk and suffered permanent eye damage.

3. Having a very pregnant illegal Hispanic woman ask me if I wanted to get married while I was working in her house. Turns out her relatives had put her up to it. If I would make a fake marriage with her she could get benefits. The real father had run out on her.

4. Had an Irish roommate here on a holiday visa but was working illegally marry an American just so he could get citizenship and the right to work. I actually got him a job (now I know better) and the boss started paying him and an illegal Aussie more than me. The Aussie still wanted to strike for more money even though he was illegal.

5, Had a big Swiss Hotel General Manager who had the swagger and character of a combination Teutonic Nazi, a white supremacist and a Mafia boss who would be physically and verbally intimidating, was racist and looked down on everyone. Why do we let these people into the country in the first place? He ended up choking on his own karma.

When doing construction work I was often put in charge of guiding the Hispanics, probably half of them illegal. I would always treat them well and try to communicate with them with what Spanish I knew. Then came the day when there was a foreman who was a Hispanic immigrant who had worked his way up. Suddenly they were treating me like crap because I was the minority. IN MY OWN COUNTRY! It was a wakening call for me.

Had a Hispanic gas station worker tell me there wasn’t any work there even though there was a sign up in the window. He was saving the job for one of his buddies.

Even that highly enlightened Comedy Central personality Carlo Mendez had an interview on his show asking a Hispanic guy at a work site if he would feel bad taking a job from an American. “Hell no!” he answered both laughing heartily about it.

Build that wall! We have enough people in this country to do the work we need done already. And we can be compassionate with the people who are here already; there are definitely enough of them.

Share

Posted in Serious Commentary0 Comments

Never Kiss A Saber Toothed Squirrel.

Never Kiss A Saber Toothed Squirrel.

It isn’t often one sees a saber toothed squirrel.

Of course, it isn’t often one wants to see a saber toothed squirrel, but when one does see one it invariably leads to commentary. For instance: “Why the (bleep) does that squirrel have a saber tooth and how can he chew anything without sticking himself?” is often heard. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Environment0 Comments

A Country Gets The Leaders It Deserves

A Country Gets The Leaders It Deserves

A Country Gets The Leaders It Deserves
An unfunny article-

There is an old saying that “a country gets the leaders it deserves.”

So what does that say about the United States and the choices it has made of late?

It says that we are now a superficial, gullible people, recognizing only projected and imagined qualities in a person. We are so in need of a hero in a land where self interest is the strongest passion that we imagine heroes where there is really only mundaneness. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Serious Commentary2 Comments

Trump’s List Of Things To Do On His First Day In Office.

Trump’s List Of Things To Do On His First Day In Office.

Trump’s List Of Thing To Do On His First Day In Office.

Have Hillary and Bill ‘mysteriously’ disappear.

Finalize deal with Putin on co-overseeing Russia’s oil industry. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Politics, Top Stories0 Comments

The Machiavellian Guide To Becoming President

The Machiavellian Guide To Becoming President

The Machiavellian Guide To Becoming President
(as channeled from the nether worlds to his humble servants Donald Trump and rfreed)

Note to the historically impaired – Niccolò Machiavelli was a 15th century historian, writer and politician who emphasized using the Dark Side of the Force when ruling. Rumor has it that President Select Donald Trump keeps a copy of his book ‘The Prince’ at his beside to ponder over when he is finished with his Tweets for the night. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Politics0 Comments

Hot Out of the Oven – New Donald Trump Memes

Donald Trump Memes Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Internets Tubes, World News0 Comments

Who Needs Real News When Fake News Is Way More Fun (It never stopped Fox News or Donald Trump)

Who Needs Real News When Fake News Is Way More Fun (It never stopped Fox News or Donald Trump)

Fake News Fer Sale! Git Yer Fake News Right Here!

Suddenly fake news stories are the In Thing and do we have ’em here for you!

Get in on the latest fad and power trip going- fake news stories! Amaze your friends! Harass your enemies! Embarrass your mom!
We have them for you here in all shapes and sizes. And all political, ethnic, social and gender variations.

Need a story to make Trump look like a hero- got ’em right here for ya!

Need a tale that makes him look like a chump? Got that too. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Politics, Top Stories1 Comment

A Message For Trump’s Minions Worded In The Vernacular You Understand Best

A Message For Trump’s Minions Worded In The Vernacular You Understand Best

In a bow to our supposed new President I submit this missive attempting to recreate the style of communicating that he does best in order to express myself properly to those who elected him. This letter, this message, this fatal death rattle is intended for those who brought him to power, to those who so loyally follow and support him. I will put aside my normal filtration of speech and mildly PC manner to which I am used to. I begin-

You stupid f—kheads! Do you have any idea what you have done? By voting for this arrogant bastard from a whore mother you have flushed America down the toilet! Thanks for inflicting your alcohol induced conception of what a President should be on the rest of us!

Do you really believe the bulls—t he spouts? Are you that f—king stupid? He is the greatest con artist since PT Barnum! And the circus he starts will be just as great. Continue Reading

Share

Posted in Top Stories0 Comments

Page 1 of 3512345...102030...Last »
Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Our Top Authors (last 30-days)



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial