Just In Time For Halloween! – A Tour Of The Saudi Consulate In Istanbul (aka ‘Middle-Eastern Torture Chamber’)


Here we go boys and girls! A fun and horror filled tour awaits at the notorious Saudi Arabian Consulate in Istanbul, now infamous for the mysterious disappearance of Saudi dissident journalist Jamal Khashoggi last week. Mr. Khashoggi entered there to take care of business, never to come back out again. It appears that the Saudi monarchy decided to take care of its business with Mr. Khashoggi once and for all, and it wasn’t particularly diplomatic. Now, to make up for losses, the building owners have decided to cash in on the notoriety and make it into a haunted house for Halloween for all the Western tourists coming into the country.

Be sure to see all these attractions inside the compound – Read more Just In Time For Halloween! – A Tour Of The Saudi Consulate In Istanbul (aka ‘Middle-Eastern Torture Chamber’)

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To ‘Kowtow’ – An Unfortunate New Habit Imported From China


kow·tow
ˌkouˈtou/
verb
1.
Act in an excessively subservient manner.
“She didn’t have to kowtow to a boss.”
Synonyms:
Grovel to, be obsequious to, be servile to, be sycophantic to, fawn over/on, cringe to, bow and scrape to, toady to, truckle to, abase oneself before, humble oneself to.
2.
HISTORICAL
Kneel and touch the ground with the forehead in worship or submission as part of Chinese custom.
Synonyms:
Prostrate oneself before, bow (down) to/ before, genuflect to/before, do/make obeisance to/before, fall on one’s knees before, kneel before
“They kowtowed to the Emperor.”

(Definition courtesy of Wikipedia)

Kowtow is a Chinese word that we Westerners and, yes, we Americans are starting to learn the true meaning of. It means to bow down before someone, to grovel, to be subservient. Unfortunately, we are doing it increasingly towards the inventors of the word. Read more To ‘Kowtow’ – An Unfortunate New Habit Imported From China

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The Great American Novel Has Finally Been Written! Which of Trump’s New Books Is It?

Getting ready for the day he leaves office, (which might not be far away), President-Select Trump has a whole host of ghost-written books all ready for publication to make sure he stays in the public spotlight long after the Oval Office lights fade. (Also to make sure the mullah keeps rolling in; he is getting up there in years, after all!)

Maybe You Can’t Fool All The People All The Time, But I Am Going To Give It a Try Any Way.

The Power of Obnoxiousness – An Awesome Tool To Becoming To Gaining Power And Becoming Really Rich.

As President, I Am The Biggest Winner Of All And You Are All Losers. Read more The Great American Novel Has Finally Been Written! Which of Trump’s New Books Is It?

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Future NRA Investment Projects In Keeping With Their Violent Tradition

The NRA, reeling after the public notice of their being cash strapped as of late, have decided to expand their financial base of interests to survive. Since their specialized focus of interest are items of destruction it only follows that their business interests would reflect that.

The National Rifle Association bought up 30% of Dow/DuPont’s holdings in napalm, the flesh burning gel made famous and popular during the Vietnam War for adding more inhumanity to an already inhuman war. When asked why the NRA chose this particular substance to put money into, the answer given by a spokesman (the NRA does not believe in ‘spokespersons’) was that:

It can git (sic) the people hiding that bullits (sic) can’t! Sance (sic) the NRA at its roots is about killin’ (sic) fur (sic) fun, why not include napalm, a time-tested, proven fun killer?

Also heavily invested into was flesh-eating bacteria, a somewhat strange choice as the horrible disease that has deprived people of their limbs and lives has no apparent market value, and science has not found a cure or preventive for it. Again, a spokesman has stated:

While there is as yet not a commercially viable use for it, an imaginative person could come up with all sorts of creative uses for it…

This had a quieting effect on the minds of the audience listening, and a collective gasp once the full meaning of this answer settled in.

Land mines, a throwback to an icon of the last two World Wars, is making a comeback in less developed lands; the NRA. being keen on developing financial opportunities in other countries, has seized on it. When asked if any of these newly invested mines would be used to hurt American soldiers the answer was.

Of course we don’t want our boys to get hurt by them, but once they leave our warehouses we can’t be responsible for whosever hands they end up in, just like handguns.

An ironical statement if there ever was one.

An even further throwback- guillotines- has also caught the organization’s wandering eye and wallet.

They may seem very archaic, but when it comes to causing human misery and violent death, it is hard to ignore this device’s impact. And, as every one knows, we are really into anything that has to do with violence!

Heroin and meth rate highly on the NRA’s investment program as, kilo for kilo, these normally illegal drugs are one of the most profitable commodities there are. The NRA also promises to fight as viciously and mercilessly as they do already with guns to get these substances legalized.

After all, it is all about the freedom!

again stated their very hard working and seemingly ethic-less spokesman. An added side venture is that in entering a business territory normally dominated by violent cartels, the NRA’s investment would greatly help out their semi-automatic and automatic gun sales.

Stock shares in Agent Orange have gone up since the NRA invested millions into it. The defunct and illegal chemical agent responsible for horrifying deformities in Vietnam is now getting a fresh life despite it being forbidden by almost every country on earth.

We will see about changing that…

stated the NRA’s formidable chief lawyer with a wink and a nod.

Lastly, the NRA also has put opt stock options on opening up the market for medieval torture devices from the Inquisition just because they thought they were really cool.

 

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Semi Humorous Meetings With Strange Creatures In The Night

The following are real life experiences:

It was my first time to Steamboat Springs in Colorado. As was my usual way of traveling in my younger days, I planned on camping out in the rough – i.e., no tent; only a tarp for rain cover. I climbed up a mountain side on the outside of town and found myself on the top of a cliff over looking a deep ravine containing a tumbling river. The cliff I stood on was scary high, but had a barren, partially flat top just right for sleeping. The cliff to the river was frightening, but there was a very short fence that would awaken me if I happened to roll that way although I was sleeping perpendicular to the the edge of it. I tucked in for the night. Read more Semi Humorous Meetings With Strange Creatures In The Night

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The Yahoo Comments Page Tears Up Cheeky Russian Spy’s Fundraiser to Save Her Butt (& Other Naughty Bits)

Once again, the Yahoo comments pages proves to be the best satire site going. Maria Butina, the pro NRA Russian gun advocate and good Trump friend (what Russian isn’t nowadays) has been accused of spying on the U.S. and wasn’t above using sex to accomplish that. It seems that the barrels of her guns weren’t the only things that were hot when Ms. Butina was around. Read more The Yahoo Comments Page Tears Up Cheeky Russian Spy’s Fundraiser to Save Her Butt (& Other Naughty Bits)

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