Archive | Gadgets & Gizmos

Galen Erso will Design Note8

Galen Erso will Design Note8

Seoul, South Korea: Samsung announced that they have a new Head of Engineering overseeing the design of the Galaxy Note8.

Galen Erso, the only engineer from the Note7 project deemed competent enough to avoid termination will be taking the helm of the so-called “Next Great Thing.” Continue Reading

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Android versus iPhone: Let’s Agree to Disagree

Android versus iPhone: Let’s Agree to Disagree

The Android versus iPhone debate has been persistent ever since the top selling smartphones became contenders. As with many types of technology, there are hardcore brand supporters who will not and cannot be persuaded to try something different. So, while you may already have your mind set on whether or not you will be a lifelong Android or iPhone user, it’s diplomatic to say that we can all agree to disagree; both phones have a lot of great qualities. Continue Reading

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What’s Next for Wearables?

What’s Next for Wearables?

It’s probably fair to say that wearable technology hasn’t quite taken off in the way Samsung and Apple might have hoped. The Apple Watch, for example, was called “confusing” by The Guardian upon its initial release in 2015 while Samsung’s attempts at cracking the niche are approaching double figures. Continue Reading

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Google’s Daydream View Brings VR Home

Google’s Daydream View Brings VR Home

While there is a plethora of Virtual Reality (VR) headsets on the market, the new light, comfortable and stylish Daydream View by Google feels like a game changer.

None of the previous headsets have quite hit the sweet spot in terms of price, comfort and usability, to make VR experiences accessible to the mass market. But Google’s Daydream is considerably cheaper than the Oculus Rift or the HTC Vive, is far more comfortable that Google Cardboard and is for mobile VR, so users don’t require a powerful PC. Continue Reading

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Saved by the bell: When your phone saves you from boredom

Saved by the bell: When your phone saves you from boredom

When the idea of the mobile phone was made a reality back in the early 1980s, it was done so with the aim of enabling people to make and receive calls from wherever they were. Nowadays, though, phone calls are often one of the lesser used functions of a mobile phone. Since the smartphone has hit the shelves, the mobile device has taken a new life from phone to computer, camera to games console, and as new apps keep hitting the market, it is bound to get even more functions. With almost three billion people across the globe currently in possession of a smartphone, it’s probably fair to say as a civilisation that we are now pretty reliant on our phones for a host of reasons.

One aspect of life a mobile phone can help us with is when we’re just waiting around. Whether it’s while you’re waiting for a bus, sat on a toilet or in the process of being stood up on a first date, our smartphones can save us from boredom as well as potentially awkward situations.

Waiting

As you’re waiting for a train or a date, a smartphone can be a game-changer. While in years gone by you would have been forced to read the train timetable or try to act as though the wine menu was intensely interesting, you can now simply get out your phone and check out your social media or catch up on last night’s episode of Celebrity Masterchef. With so many awesome apps constantly being released, as long as you have your phone with you, you no longer have to suffer from the boredom virus.

Toilet Breaks

Sitting on the toilet and reading the newspaper might be how your parents did things but the world has changed over the past 20 years. A recent survey by Voucherbox found that over three quarters of respondents took their phones with them to the toilet. You might expect many to be using this time as a chance to catch up on social media or play games. The truth is that many actually use their toilet break as an opportunity to work, with over half sending an email while one in 10 people who responded to the survey admitted to taking part in conference calls while taking care of their own personal “business”. It’s not all work, though, with 51% revealing they make online purchases while in the bathroom – adding a whole new meaning to the expression “spending a penny”.

Cinema

Let’s be honest, we’ve all ended up spending two hours in a cinema on a first date wanting to walk out because the film was just terrible but having to stay because leaving someone in the cinema on their own is up there with checking out the waitress/waiter in terms of bad first-date moves.

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Rather than having to watch the latest Adam Sandler offering on the big screen, you can instead watch the second half of the football or the latest episode of Game of Thrones. And if the date is going as badly as the film, your smartphone can save the day again as you order an Uber and get yourself out of Dodge.

So, while we might have begun to take our smartphones for granted, take a moment to reflect on just how important to everyday life our phones are. And try not to drop it down the toilet when you’re next playing Candy Crush and avoiding work.

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Pokemon-Go Craze Puts U.S. Elections in Doubt

Pokemon-Go Craze Puts U.S. Elections in Doubt

NEW YORK – The incredibly addictive Pokemon-Go app, which has sent countless millions of people out into the world to stare at their cell phones more than ever, has now put the U.S. Presidential elections in doubt.

Current CNN polls show that voter turnout will be at an all-time low (17%) as millions of registered voters see little point in voting for U.S. President while there are still so many fabulous Pokemon characters out there to catch.

“There’s an election like every four years, right? But Pokemon-Go is a once-in-a-lifetime event,” said Wayne Potman, 25, of Salt Lake City. “I’m not against voting, so if I’m out that day, and there happens to be a Poke-Stop or a really cool Gym right by the voting location, then I might go in to vote. Seriously. If the line is not too long.”

Pokemon-Go creator, Niantic, has promised to seed U.S. voting locations with PokeStops and rare Pokemons in a desperate effort to boost voter turnout. “We see this as a win-win and a no-brainer,” said Niantic spokesman Jesus Angleton Dulles. “We will do our part to try to resuscitate the dying American Republic through Pokemon and Pokemon-Go.”

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How Much a Smartphone will Really Cost You

How Much a Smartphone will Really Cost You

Smartphones are all around us, and everybody wants them. They need this kind of technology in their lives, to read the news, to stalk their exes on social networks, and to make all the selfies they need. But, like all things in life, smartphones are costly – and their costs often go beyond what meets the eye. Let us calculate the real cost of you playing on your smartphone.

The tangible part

Smartphones are built using a series of materials, ranging from plastic recycled from LEGO blocks, Twinkies wrappers, and PET bottles regurgitated by endangered oceanic fish, to metals extracted by child miners in backwater countries of the Third World. Their screens are sanded to perfection using a fine, white powder made out of the milk teeth of 18 year old virgins – and we all know how hard these are to come by. Since all their components are extremely small, gremlin guest workers are hired to do this tenuous job. The resulting hardware is rendered extra frail to have as short a replacement cycle as possible.

The games you play

No smartphone would be complete without the reels of a slot machine running on its screen. Experts recommend the All Slots Casino, at www.allslotscasino.com, an international operator with a massive library of games, as the best destination to gamble online. Not for the users in the US, though – the All Slots Casino is, unfortunately, not accepting players from the land of the free, thanks to a law passed by a greedy government in 2006. But players in other countries, from Canada to Australia, are free to play one of the more than one hundred amazing slot machines and table games available at the All Slots Mobile Casino. And they don’t even have to pay for this privilege – the All Slots Casino offers them the chance to play their favorite game free of charge, as well.

The hidden costs

To play games on your smartphone, you’ll need something nobody tells you about from the start: an internet connection. Connecting to the global network secretly supervised by every three-letter agency in the US (and some others which don’t even have acronyms, if you can imagine something like this in the Land of the Free) will allow smartphone users not only to play their favorite games (carefully filtered by the authorities, of course), but to follow their preferred news sources online. Like ours, for example. But this will come at a cost.

Since you can’t always rely on your dumb neighbor’s unsecured WiFi, you’ll need to subscribe to your own data plan. And this will set you back an easy $20 each month – more, if the above mentioned agencies’ tracking code messes with your transfer speeds.

As you can see, the retail price of your smartphone is minuscule compared to what building it costs the environment, and human dignity. Be proud to own such a priceless piece of technology!

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Windows 10 Introduces Wide Array of Exciting New System Errors

Windows 10 Introduces Wide Array of Exciting New System Errors

Microsoft is proud to introduce Windows 10, the latest version of our operating system for PCs and tablets.

To help you get to know our new system better, here are answers to some questions you might have.

Why is it called Windows 10 when your last operating system was Windows 8?

Lots of people have asked this question. Some folks think that that because Windows 8 was such an unpopular disaster we wanted to put a little numerical distance between it and our new system. Continue Reading

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DADDS Drunk Driver System Promises More Hassle, Road Deaths

DADDS Drunk Driver System Promises More Hassle, Road Deaths

NHTSA is seriously considering a mandate to put breathalyzers in every single new car on the road.

Not only is the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration considering it, they’ve been funding its research since 2008 with millions already invested.

Sure, DADDS it’s impractical, inconvenient and ineffective, but more importantly, it stands to actually increase road deaths. Continue Reading

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Lessons from This Year in Tech and Fashion

Lessons from This Year in Tech and Fashion

Tech is the new fashion. If that was ever in doubt, ask the editors from Vogue, Marie Claire and other fashion magazines who attended the Apple Watch launch in Cupertino, CA, instead of covering New York Fashion Week (NYFW).

​The fashion and technology worlds have more in common than some people realize. One is a cut-throat industry, fueled by gossip and petty jealousies, the search for the next big thing and the need to stay ahead of look-a-like designs – and the other is the fashion business. Continue Reading

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American secret agents exposed by phone app?

American secret agents exposed by phone app?

A stunning announcement was made at a secret hacker conference last month to little fanfare.

An app was made available for the Android or IPhone platform that exposes the secret agents working for America’s top secret organizations.

Called “Find my Spy”, the app is supposed to find any currently employed agent by name or location. Since the announcement the app has gone viral and has reportedly been downloaded over 3 million times already in fifty seven countries so far. Continue Reading

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Many Using iPhones to Surgically Replace Entire Brains

Many Using iPhones to Surgically Replace Entire Brains

In the latest cool trend to hit the streets masses of young people are getting their I-phones installed in their heads where their brains used to be.

The popularity and 24 hour a day usage of Apples extremely popular gadget has brought about this new fad that has taken the modern world by storm.

The surgical operation, which only takes a few hours but is costly, rewires a persons nerves to interact with the small machine instead of the much weightier brain which is removed. Continue Reading

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Apple to Remotely Disable All iPhone 4S Models and Older 7 Days After iPhone 6 Release

Apple to Remotely Disable All iPhone 4S Models and Older 7 Days After iPhone 6 Release

CALIFORNIA: In a statement released today by Apple CEO Tim Cook, all iPhone models 4S and older are scheduled to be shut down and remotely wiped seven days after the release of the iPhone 6 on September 9th.

“Customers who have resisted upgrading to our exciting and new technology need to catch up to the rest of us, and we are requiring these individuals to experience our leap in innovation by September 16th,” said Cook.

“I mean, so much has changed since our 4S model. Personally, I can’t even begin to imagine how these people live their daily lives with the traditional 30 pin charging connector or a pathetic VGA front-facing camera.” Continue Reading

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NRA Demands US Government Outlaw Drones Despite 2nd Amendment

NRA Demands US Government Outlaw Drones Despite 2nd Amendment

In a strange reversal of policy the NRA has demanded that the U.S. make a ban on drones very much like the ban on guns that they have so heatedly fought against in the past.

Speaking at a press conference NRA Fuhrer Wayne LaPierre has vehemently asserted that “Drones are dangerous! They are potential weapons of mass destruction! They should not be allowed in the wrong hands!” Continue Reading

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Cooper Brand Pooper Scoopers are Super-Duper Cooper Scoopers

Cooper Brand Pooper Scoopers are Super-Duper Cooper Scoopers

Montgomery County, Pennsylvania – Assisting residents in cleaning up the debris left behind from their crushed dreams of having locally born celebrity, Bradley Cooper, win an Academy Award are Cooper Industries’ pooper scoopers that have been flying off the shelves at neighborhood stores.

“It’s just a coincidence that Cooper Industries manufactures pooper scoopers and they are being used for this purpose. We have sold over 500 in the past hour alone!” Inventory Manager at the local Walmart, Phil Bredstickey said.

Residents have been voicing their opinions since the most recent loss occurred earlier this year on March 2nd. “Everyone in the area had their dreams shattered to breadsticks,” said Cooper’s former neighbor, Jan Cimorbasquets, who still remembers watching an adolescent Bradley whiff on what would have been a winning soccer kick in 1984.

“We all thought he was a lock to win for Silver Linings Playbook and then again for American Hustle, but all they gave him were insulting MTV Movie Awards,” she added.

According to local police, the remains associated with the anticipated celebration and the heartbreaking loss are so great that Montgomery County is offering a tax credit to anyone that purchased a pooper scooper and/or trash bags in aiding the cleanup effort.

Meanwhile, the pile of debris continues to grow and has local environmentalists on edge. “We are fearing the worst for endangered animals that may try to use the debris to build homes or consume them as a food source. These are very fragile animals and include the breadhog and garlic-tailed deer,” said Pennsylvania Game and Wildlife Commissioner, Deuce Changaro.

Cooper branded pooper scoopers were first introduced to the public in the late 1980s as dogs continued to grow larger and larger, leaving specimens on lawns and carpets that were too much for a miniscule hand pooper scooper. The company barely avoided bankruptcy in 2009, but has recently seen a tremendous spike in sales.

“As more and more fans of Bradley Cooper give their hopes up that he will ever win an Academy Award, they are turning to our product to clean up the anticipated celebratory items that were left behind,” said the company mascot, Scoopy, the super-duper pooper scooper.

Donations and volunteers to aid in the effort are still being accepted. Anyone interested in helping should call Paula Rhondstatter at 1-800-533-7510 or visit www.bradleycooperpooperscoopercleanup.gov

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Text Walking to Become New Olympic Sport

Text Walking to Become New Olympic Sport

Rio de Janeiro – Text walking will become the newest sport to be part of the Olympic Games starting in Rio in 2016. The act of texting while walking has never been considered a sport but since so few people get killed while performing the act, Olympic officials assume there must be some skill involved in the activity.

Although still a relatively new activity in some parts of the world, millions of people navigate their daily lives while having their eyes and attention diverted to their handheld devices for hours on end. Miraculously, only a small number of these self-absorbed people end up in the hospital or worse from the activity. Continue Reading

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