Posted in Education Entertainment

Memo from S.F. School Board: Now Changing Book Titles Instead of School Names

From: San Francisco Unified School District BoardTo: District English Teachers Background: • We recently identified and published the 44 school names we deem necessary to change.• Some object to initiating this measure when children and you aren’t in classrooms, but…

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Posted in Entertainment

Clown Humiliated After Flower Blasts Him in the Face with Water

Local clown, Giggles, 48, was left sopping wet and thoroughly embarrassed after leaning over to smell a nearby daffodil and was promptly sprayed in the face with a stream of water during a circus act. Giggles, momentarily caught off guard,…

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Posted in Entertainment Politics Top Stories

BIDEN NIXES $2000 STIMULUS
CHECKS; TELLS CONCERNED
AMERICANS TO BUY
DOGECOIN

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A couple weeks into a new administration, we’ve already had some sweeping changes take place in our nation’s capital. Since being sworn in as the 46th President of the United States, Joe Biden has been quite busy….

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CHECKS; TELLS CONCERNED
AMERICANS TO BUY
DOGECOIN
Posted in Entertainment Politics Top Stories

I am Ralphie. I Apologize for Rioting.

By Ralph “Ralphie” Parker, By now multiple videos of me during the recent riots have been widely viewed on the internet. I feel that it’s necessary to apologize to my family and friends, and my fans, who know me only…

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Posted in Entertainment Politics Top Stories

Ivanka Trump Launches ‘Vanka’s Pop-Up Elite Ultra-Right Insurrection
Club’

While ex-president and self-declared greatest man that ever lived, DonaldTrump, sulks and skulks in his palatial Florida mansion, his favourite wife /daughter, Ivanka, has yet again astounded the world with her insatiable greed.Her ability to prize cash from the super-rich…

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Club’
Posted in Entertainment

Have you ever heard of the Trumps?

SLUDGE INTERNET NEWS              January 25, 2031 “Have you ever heard of the Trumps?” Gene, my editor, blew his stack when I asked to write a story about them. “Who wants to read about a couple of rednecks living in…

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Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Top Stories

Trump Summarizes Selected Works of Shakespeare

Hamlet This is the story of a king, a great king, who was doing a marvelous job running his country. Until a very bad, very disgraceful person put a stop to it. His name was Claudius, and the whack job…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Trump Summarizes Selected Works of Shakespeare
Posted in Entertainment

Teenager Honors Slavic Heritage By Commenting “cyka blyat” Underneath Every YouTube Video About Russia He Comes Across

MARTHA’S VINEYARD, MA– Massachusetts teen, Charles Chadworth III, is keeping his familial heritage alive by commenting the phrase “cyka blyat” beneath every YouTube video about Russia he stumbles across. Chadworth told reporters that he developed a calling to get in…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Teenager Honors Slavic Heritage By Commenting “cyka blyat” Underneath Every YouTube Video About Russia He Comes Across
Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Politics Top Stories

BREAKING: Trump Social Media Blackout Reaches 100% As OnlyFans Issues The President LIFETIME BAN

Internet sex work giant, subscription service, and simp-haven OnlyFans has permanently banned President Trump from utilizing its website. In a statement released on January 9th, the company wrote, “In light of the recent railing of our precious democracy by rioters,…

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Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Politics Top Stories

Trump Uses Taxpayer’s Money to Pay for His Latest Portrait

It was revealed today that the outgoing self-proclaimed greatest ever American president, Donald Trump, has spent $2bn of US taxpayers’ money on a portrait of himself. The portrait was commissioned yesterday evening and was completed within fifteen minutes by New…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Trump Uses Taxpayer’s Money to Pay for His Latest Portrait