Posted in Making Headlines

Mutharika Makes Statement On Vampires

As the world becomes a smaller place thanks to digital technology, it’s becoming easier than ever to pass ideas from one culture to another. Digital streaming means that we can view films that were made in other countries and in…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Mutharika Makes Statement On Vampires
Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Top Stories

“Everyone should get back to work and stop thinking critically,” say Residents Fighting Against Town Name Change

The world is actively trying to purge systemic racism from every nook and cranny of our lives and institutions. Statues of racists are tumbling down across the world, and now, even racist town names are being changed in a move…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! “Everyone should get back to work and stop thinking critically,” say Residents Fighting Against Town Name Change
Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Sports

Washington Redskins to be Renamed Rainbow-Farting-Unicorns

In a controversial move deisgned to appease the nation’s vegan transgender vaping atheists and left-handed male feminist pastafarian apache helicopters, the Washington Redskins have agreed to rename their team to the more politically correct Fedex-Farting-Unicorns. Dan Snyder, owner of the Washington Redskins,…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Washington Redskins to be Renamed Rainbow-Farting-Unicorns
Posted in Entertainment Making Headlines Politics

Barr’s Secret Police Identified as Unemployed Walmart Security Guards

Washington DC (WAPO) Dismayed by the May jobs report and the unabated protests outside the White House, Administration Spokesperson, Kay (I need to get…) leighed MagaNinny announced yesterday that Attorney Generalissimo William Barf, Economic Guru Supremo Kevin Hassbeen and Walmart…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Barr’s Secret Police Identified as Unemployed Walmart Security Guards
Posted in Human Interest Making Headlines Politics Top Stories World News

Nation of Self-Obsessed Attention Hogs Whine  About Sea Levels Rising Due to Climate Change

FUNAFUTI, TUVALU– After years of whining and moaning about possible ecological devastation and flooding which would render their entire country uninhabitable, little Tuvalu finally got its moment in the sun when the international press threw the petulant brats a handful…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Nation of Self-Obsessed Attention Hogs Whine  About Sea Levels Rising Due to Climate Change
Posted in Entertainment Health Making Headlines Science & Technologizzy

New York Hospital to Begin Clinical Trial for ‘Impossible Whopper’ Prescriptions to Combat COVID-19

NEW YORK, NY – Scientists and medical professionals have found something very interesting in the rates of survivability between men and women in regard to the COVID-19 pandemic. On average, more women are recovering from the virus than men. Scientists…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! New York Hospital to Begin Clinical Trial for ‘Impossible Whopper’ Prescriptions to Combat COVID-19
Posted in Making Headlines Strange People Technology

Stalker turns a woman’s hair into a diamond engagement ring

A woman meets her stalker face to face for the first time and he proposes with a diamond made from her hair. Shockingly, she said “Yes!” Two years later, they are still together with a baby on the way. Melvin…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Stalker turns a woman’s hair into a diamond engagement ring
Posted in Making Headlines Politics Technology Top Stories

Trump Names Jared and Ivanka Ventilator Co-Czars

Washington, DC (AP) At yesterday’s White House press briefing President Trump made the stunning announcement that his daughter Ivanka and her husband Jared Kushner, by Executive Order # 1001, will assume the newly created positions of Ventilator co-Czars. The action…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Trump Names Jared and Ivanka Ventilator Co-Czars
Posted in Making Headlines Politics Top Stories World News

We Interrupt This Breaking News for Breaking News

Wolf Blitzer: This is Wolf Blitzer. Welcome to The Situation Room. We have important breaking news. The Wall Street Journal reports that Democrats in Congress are pushing back against President Trump’s plans to go to war with Iran. They are…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! We Interrupt This Breaking News for Breaking News
Posted in Making Headlines

Thousands of Middle Class Americans Storm Mexican Border Seeking Better Life.

A major melee occurred today on the American/Mexican border as thousands of middle class Americans stormed the fences and barricades separating them from Central American soil. Overwhelmed and surprised Mexican border guards at first tried to halt the massive human…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Thousands of Middle Class Americans Storm Mexican Border Seeking Better Life.