Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc Society

Uncouth Act at Remembrance Day Inspires Award-Winning Poem

London Poet Alan Wright has won ‘Poem of the year 2018’ – an impromptu poem recital, inspired by the actions of an uncouth man in the crowd at London’s Remembrance Day. Wright 52, told Glossy News: “I was asked to…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Uncouth Act at Remembrance Day Inspires Award-Winning Poem
Posted in World News

London Lady Discovers Donkey Dentures in Salad

Everyboy loves dining in London, even the city has its downsides too. London saleswoman Casey McKenzie has discovered donkey dentures in her salad at a London restaurant. Casey’s husband Roger told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Lady Discovers Donkey Dentures in Salad
Posted in Health

London Doctor Gets Head Stuck in Patient’s Anus

London doctor Mary Silverstein accidentally got her whole head trapped inside a patient’s anus during a routine prostate examination. Patient Walter Bottomley 54, told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Doctor Gets Head Stuck in Patient’s Anus
Posted in Top Stories

London Man Discovers Chin in Phone Box

London street cleaner Tim Hargreaves had a nasty surprise when he discovered a chin in a London phone box. Hargreaves, 57, told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Man Discovers Chin in Phone Box
Posted in Top Stories

London Cafe Manager Prosecuted for Serving Yolkless Eggs

London café manager Jim Fry 62, has been prosecuted for serving his customers the not so widely renowned metropolitan delicacy of yolkless eggs; beloved of elitist intellectuals, union barons, greed Tory yacht botherers and dodgy career politicos of all ideological…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Cafe Manager Prosecuted for Serving Yolkless Eggs
Posted in World News

Big Smoke Blow-Up! Randy Londoners Go Insane Over Harrod’s Shop Window Beauty!

London car mechanic Brian Love was so smitten over a lady he spotted standing in a Harrods shop window, he lost his mind. The warm, chubby, hearty 53 year old greaser Love told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Big Smoke Blow-Up! Randy Londoners Go Insane Over Harrod’s Shop Window Beauty!
Posted in Celebrity Gossip Sports Scandals

Can Fish & Man Live in Peace?! George Bush Caught Up in Appalling Swimming Costume Drama…

In a comical oversight, Ex-President of the United States George Bush forgot to take his swimming costume with him at Washington’s renowned Sports & Leisure Village.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Can Fish & Man Live in Peace?! George Bush Caught Up in Appalling Swimming Costume Drama…
Posted in Talky Pictures World News

No Sleaze Please, We’re British! Tortured Hollywood Supremo’s Wrongful Sex Arrest in Red Light London!

[Ed: If ever a Hollywood sleaze story deserved a share, it’s this one! Absolutely unbelievable! Hold on to yer… whatever]. In a move that will shock many fans and devotees of the IHIC (Inspirational Hollywood Intellectual Community), stellar film producer…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! No Sleaze Please, We’re British! Tortured Hollywood Supremo’s Wrongful Sex Arrest in Red Light London!
Posted in Entertainment World News

“We All Must Suffer for Our Art!” Grandiose Scottish Poet Nails Ear to Tree, Wins Universal Acclaim

A Scottish poet (apparently not, however, a Dutch one!) had to be rescued by the renowned Edinburgh Fire Brigade after nailing his own ear to a tree. Stan ‘the word’ Smith 36, revealed the source of inspiration that had prompted…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! “We All Must Suffer for Our Art!” Grandiose Scottish Poet Nails Ear to Tree, Wins Universal Acclaim
Posted in Entertainment Television

London Man Dines with Cheese on his Face in Reality TV Show

A London man has appeared in the Reality TV dinner dating show ‘Love Luncheon’ with cheese on his face. Reality TV star Ted Stilton told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Man Dines with Cheese on his Face in Reality TV Show
Posted in World News

London Poet Rescued from Buffalo at Dublin Hotel

Iconic London poet Charles Brady had to be rescued from the inside of a buffalo this week, at Dublin’s Raven Hotel in Ireland. Brady told Glossy News:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! London Poet Rescued from Buffalo at Dublin Hotel
Posted in Top Stories

Film Critic Fired at London Cinema

Edinburgh based film critic Mary Watkins has been arrested for shooting dead sixty four cinema goers at an Ealing cinema. One witness commented: It all started with her open disapproval of the opening credit names in the introduction to the…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Film Critic Fired at London Cinema
Posted in Crime World News

Unbelievable! New Fines Introduced For Silly “Cooking & Driving” Offence… What’s Going On!

Drivers caught cooking whilst driving are to face tough penalties, the government says. Under new rules expected to come in next year, drivers will receive six points on their license and a £120 fine.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Unbelievable! New Fines Introduced For Silly “Cooking & Driving” Offence… What’s Going On!
Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc Entertainment

Roy ‘Chubby’ Brown Wins Poet Laureate Award

Stand up comedian Roy ‘Chubby’ Brown has won the Poet Laureate award for 2018. The controversial blue comic won the coveted prize after one of the competition’s judges discovered one of his poems written on a public toilet wall in…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Roy ‘Chubby’ Brown Wins Poet Laureate Award
Posted in Talky Pictures

Toilet Roll to be Next James Bond

It’s been officially announced this week! The new James Bond is to be played by a toilet roll, in the new James Bond movie: “Firing Bullets from out of a gun.”

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Toilet Roll to be Next James Bond
Posted in Health World News

Jeremy Hunt Warns the Public of… “Cough Your Asshole Out Craze!”

UK secretary of state for health Jeremy Hunt has warned the public of the latest social media craze… ‘Cough your asshole out!

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Jeremy Hunt Warns the Public of… “Cough Your Asshole Out Craze!”
Posted in Society

ANYONE FOR TEA?! (A Poem From My Days as an Office Tea Boy)

Simon needs a herbal, or he’ll get in a strop, Lucy wants the cream in, or moan that it’s a flop.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! ANYONE FOR TEA?! (A Poem From My Days as an Office Tea Boy)
Posted in Politics Sports Events

‘I Was A Professional Racing Driver in my Youth!’ Claims Donald Trump

There are concerns for Donald Trump’s mental stability in the wake of his most recent interview with Sky News. The US president told the interviewer:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! ‘I Was A Professional Racing Driver in my Youth!’ Claims Donald Trump
Posted in Top Stories

David Attenborough in Furious Rant at British Wildlife Awards

Sir David Attenborough, veteran English broadcaster and naturalist has caused a stir at The British Wildlife T.V. Awards in London. Uncharacteristically, the ‘Life On Earth’ presenter self-indulged in an indignant monologue… As he accepted the coveted prize for ‘Best Goldfish…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! David Attenborough in Furious Rant at British Wildlife Awards
Posted in Politics

Donald Trump Tells Press: I’m Not the Mad One!

At a press conference in Washington, US president Donald Trump has spoken about the media’s smear campaign that has labelled him as ‘a madman.’ Trump said: I’m not the mad one folks, it’s fake news.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Donald Trump Tells Press: I’m Not the Mad One!
Posted in Politics World News

Tony Blair to Form ‘No Bullshit Party’

Ex-UK Prime Minister Tony Blair is to form a new political party, named ‘The No Bullshit Party.’ Speaking at a BBC news conference, Blair said:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Tony Blair to Form ‘No Bullshit Party’
Posted in Music World News

Elton John in Upside-Down ‘Aeroplane Incident’

British rock star Elton John discovered the aeroplane he was due to fly on was in an upside-down position on the runway at Heathrow Airport London. The iconic rock ‘n’ roll veteran said:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Elton John in Upside-Down ‘Aeroplane Incident’
Posted in World News

Kim Jong-Un Uses Passing Train to Face-Shave

North Korea leader Kim Jong-Un has released a propaganda film of himself using a passing high speed train to shave his face. In a government campaign that hopes to encourage Korean citizens to reduce their razor purchases, Jong-Un has advised…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Kim Jong-Un Uses Passing Train to Face-Shave
Posted in Entertainment Television

Jeremy Clarkson In Street Brawl Over Car Built From Frozen Celebrity Piss

Broadcaster and motoring specialist Jeremy Clarkson has been involved in a street brawl, concerning a motor vehicle made from frozen celebrity piss. Clarkson stars in a new scheduled motoring programme to be aired on Channel Four called ‘What Can We…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Jeremy Clarkson In Street Brawl Over Car Built From Frozen Celebrity Piss
Posted in Music

Shocking Disclosure on the Death of the King: Elvis Ate Himself!

Rock ‘n’ roll legend Elvis Presley ate himself, according to an astonishing revelation from his sometime house cleaner.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Shocking Disclosure on the Death of the King: Elvis Ate Himself!
Posted in Politics

Donald Trump Bursts

U.S. president Donald Trump has sensationally burst during a Washington press conference.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Donald Trump Bursts
Posted in Strange People Travel

Heathrow Discrimination Case: Air Traffic Controller Exposed as an Orchestra Conductor

Heathrow airport air traffic controller Adam Powis 51, has been exposed as an orchestra conductor and subsequently sacked. Heathrow boss Tom Stacey commented:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Heathrow Discrimination Case: Air Traffic Controller Exposed as an Orchestra Conductor
Posted in World News

Sacked Stonehenge Tour Guide Fool Takes Employer to Court

Stonehenge tour guide buffoon Charles ‘Rocky’ Stone has taken his employer to court for unfair dismissal. Stone 56, was fired for misleading tourists with ill-informed facts and research. Stone commented:

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Sacked Stonehenge Tour Guide Fool Takes Employer to Court
Posted in Television

Live at the Apollo Wins ‘Worst UK Television Programme Award.’

T.V. stand up show ‘Live At The Apollo’ has picked up ‘The Worst UK TV Programme Award’ for 2017. The show’s producer Rick Earle thanked the TV audience in his acceptance speech: Ladies and gentleman, thank you so much for…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Live at the Apollo Wins ‘Worst UK Television Programme Award.’
Posted in Entertainment

David Blaine Trick Backfires on Live T.V.

Magician David Blaine has recently performed a new trick to a live T.V. audience; it has backfired disastrously!

WTF?! Click now to find out more! David Blaine Trick Backfires on Live T.V.