Category: Celebrity Gossip
Phantom Closing on Broadway – What Will Happen to It’s Biggest Star?
After 35 years and more than 13,000 performances, Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera is ending on Broadway in April. As the musical finishes it’s historic run, the show’s actors, musicians, and technical crew are already looking for…
Ringo Star Sues the Beatles
New York, NY – Ringo Starr, best known as the Beatles drummer, is suing his former bandmates. The suit names as defendants, Paul McCartney, Yoko Ono, and the estate of the late John Lennon. Starr alleges breach of contract and…
Gwyneth Paltrow Announces Male Focused Goop Spin Off
BALLS IN THE ERROR- Are your balls lacking the sag and elasticity of your youth? This crème product has been infused with antioxidants (beta-carotene, vitamin C, and vitamin D) and secret Chinese ingredients to restore, plumpness, sheen, and dangle. Retail Price $109.00
Obituary: Wallace Runnymede (Jonathan Ferguson) Glossy News Editor, 1983-2019
“Dr” Jonathan Ferguson, 1983-2019, was a self-styled ‘renowned intellectual’ and ‘charismatic edgelord’ who falsely claimed to hold 5 PhDs (or 3, or 2, depending on the version you hear), including one from a prominent Polish diploma mill that was so…
Judge Judy’s Guide to Life
Hi. My name’s Judge Judy. Welcome to my courtroom. You obviously have seen me on TV telling stupid imbeciles wasting my time to go get a life! I’m here today to teach you all the formula on how to become…
Can Fish & Man Live in Peace?! George Bush Caught Up in Appalling Swimming Costume Drama…
In a comical oversight, Ex-President of the United States George Bush forgot to take his swimming costume with him at Washington’s renowned Sports & Leisure Village.
Easter Fell On April Fools Day This Year!
WARNING- Not for the religiously sensitive!!! God to the world “He wasn’t really my son! He was adopted! ………………. April Fools!”
Trump Unsure Why “Crime” is Actually a Crime
President select Donald Trump has admitted to obstruction of justice and collusion, both of which are crimes, but asked Sean Hannity in a phone interview, “Why are those crimes? I mean, nothing else I do is a crime.”
Jimmy Fallon Slobbers on Guests while Serial Killer Stabs his Audience to Death
Dateline: NEW YORK CITY—Jimmy Fallon, host of The Tonight Show, played softball with his guests while a serial killer crept through the studio, killing the members of the live audience one by one as they applauded the antics of the…