Posted in Biz News Entertainment

Seuss Estate Files For Restraining Order Against Vuvuzela Manufacturer

HOOVILLE, Nova Scotia (GlossyNews) — The estate of Dr. Seuss has filed a restraining order against the manufacturer of the plastic horn known as the…

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Posted in Travel World News

Bjork, Pirates, Determined To Help Iceland Out of Economic Hardship

REYKJAVIK, Iceland (GlossyNews) — Pop singer Bjork (pronounced BEE-YORKKKKK, just like you are upchucking a bad pizza), always a fountainhead of new and eccentric ideas,…

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Posted in Entertainment Science

Director Cameron Making 4-D Movie

HOLLYWOODLAND, West Coast (GlossyNews) — Self-crowned ‘King of Directors’ James Cameron today announced a project expected to establish a new standard in cinema. Speaking from…

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Posted in Biz News Politics

We Are Taking Over This Website To Show You This Message

A MESSAGE TO THE CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES Official notification is hereby given by venue of this website to all citizens of the United…

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Posted in Entertainment Strange People

Mel Gibson Tortures Wife During Racist Rant while World Looks Away

TEXARKANA, Texas (GlossyNews) — Melvin, or Mel, Gibson, a 75-year-old redneck from Rockdale, Texas, stood on the corner of Cameron Ave and Main this morning….

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Posted in Human Interest Sports

6-Year Old Somali Girl Given Permission to Sail Solo Around the World

MOGADISHU, Somalia (Glossy News) — A six-year old Somali girl has been given permission by the Somali government to sail solo around the world in…

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Posted in Religionism Science

ET’s to End Earth Monitoring

ROSWELL, New Mexico (GlossyNews) — The Intergalactic Play Nice Force has decided to abandon Earth operations, so said District Superintendent Greg Gort today. “The IPNF…

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Posted in Sportsfolk

LeBron Mural Removed, to be Replaced by “Real” Clevelander

CLEVELAND, Ohio (GlossyNews) — The 10-story billboard of LeBron James that dominates Ontario Street in downtown Cleveland is being removed by the Nike company, which…

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Posted in Biz News Talky Pictures

Disney Tries Bold Corporate Takeover Of Entire Worlds Of Fantasy

Disney Corporation has made another great stride in its endeavor to control all possible realms of consumer fantasy. With a buyout of $4 billion in…

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Posted in Biz News Sports Sports Events

Brazil Economists Say Brazil Loss is Victory for Brazil Economy

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (GlossySports) -– While almost every Brazilian is saddened by the stunning loss of their team to the Netherlands in the quarter-final…

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