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London Riots: Who are the REAL Orwellians?

London Riots: Who are the REAL Orwellians?

I offer my solidarity, support and comradeship to everyone who, like me, is pissed off at the Orwellian banner-waving moral crusaders who want to overturn a democratic vote.

(Disclaimer: I voted for the TUSC, so I hope a hundred and 68 radical trolls I’ve never had the good fortune of meeting don’t all pile on me at once).

To speak soberly (and with all due contempt for the Equivalence Police), looking at the public FB feed, some of it is like early 20th Century Russia or the Nuremberg rallies. Continue Reading

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Posted in Serious Commentary, World News0 Comments

“But Immigration is Complex…” Uh-uh! Not so Fast!

“But Immigration is Complex…” Uh-uh! Not so Fast!

Coming up to the 2015 General Election, the inflammatory rhetoric of UKIP is a worrying feature of the complex political scene in the UK.

It’s always been complex, of course…

Well, we have had politicians who have expanded the suffrage and decriminalised homosexuality. Continue Reading

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Posted in Opinon/Editorial, Politics, World News1 Comment

Sarko in China: “Monsieur Jinping, Break Down This Wall!”

Sarko in China: “Monsieur Jinping, Break Down This Wall!”

Nicolas Sarkozy is universally renowned and respected as the man who single-handedly brought down the Berlin Wall, restored the constitutional liberties and privileges of “La République,” and ended forever the reign of jihadist terror in the entire “monde non civilisée.”

But his aura is slipping somewhat. France’s most genial, witty, charismatic, and talented “notable public figure” has upset the government of a leading nation.

Admittedly, as the Chinese Communist Party is not a straight-vanilla late-capitalist White Anglo Saxon corporatist legislative entity like France… Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News0 Comments

Patronizing Miliband, Campbell Reach out to “Stamp-Collecting Community”

Patronizing Miliband, Campbell Reach out to “Stamp-Collecting Community”

Ed Miliband has finally found a way to nail the election in 2015…

Shortly after which, he will be himself will also be nailed up and flogged in the public square by the media every day of mourning and Twitternight of his life.

Still, every Great British PM must follow the Way of the Masters… Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News0 Comments

Sexual Identity Cr-ISIS

Sexual Identity Cr-ISIS

Mosul, Iraq—This week, rebel fighter under the banner of ISIS, began destroyed over 100,000 volumes of rare, historic books.

A month prior, ISIS fighters raided the University of Mosul’s library and burned hundreds of books of cultural significance.

Why the sudden turn from enforcing strict sharia law, to now, burning antique Arabic literature? University of Mosul historian Rahman Al Salami explains, “Butt stuff. Lots and lots of butt stuff.” Continue Reading

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Posted in World News1 Comment

Finally! A New Protest on Red Square… Sort of…

Finally! A New Protest on Red Square… Sort of…

The news came across the wires of a huge protest in Moscow, right on Red Square.

Really??!!!!

Are the Russian masses finally rallying up against the ex-KGB man who has reinvented Czarism in a modern form?
Is the second great Russian revolution finally taking form?

No. False alarm. Go ahead and go back to whatever you were doing. Nothing to see here. No fire. No bodies to see. Just another Putin backed big show of force and false support for his international messing with every other country on earth. Continue Reading

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Posted in World News0 Comments

Fappers Rejoice as Aussie Developer Shuts Down Proposed Data Retention Plan

Fappers Rejoice as Aussie Developer Shuts Down Proposed Data Retention Plan

Melbourne born software Developer Mike Pearce has thwarted government plans to impose mandatory data retention for all Australian citizens by fundamentally changing the way the internet works.

Australian PM, Tony Abbott is currently being accused of bullying the opposition and scaring the Australian people into submission with his new data retention plan.

The plan is being fiercely fought by Australia’s newest political superhero-to-the-people, Senator Scott Ludlam. Continue Reading

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Posted in Technology, World News0 Comments

Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (2/2)

Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (2/2)

I’m going to list for you all the Tory politicians I admire and respect and who I think fully deserve to be UK PM…

Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News0 Comments

Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (1/2)

Tory Candidates: As-Yet-Entirely-Unspeculated Cameron Coup (1/2)

The objective media has been slandering Mr TM for his Miliband/Labour-Leak article “bias.”

What a dazzling array of Neo-New-Labour candidates… Continue Reading

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Posted in Politics, World News0 Comments

Homo Sapien Pictographs Prove Homosexuality Is Natural

Homo Sapien Pictographs Prove Homosexuality Is Natural

Paleontologists working in Southern France have discovered pictographs they estimate were placed around 10,000 B.C. The primitive drawings depict what appears to be two Neanderthal males copulating.

Lead scientist Dr. Lance Hollingsworth said, “I usually don’t get involved in politics, but clearly these cave drawing prove that homosexual relationships predate the ten commandments.” Continue Reading

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Posted in Religionism, World News0 Comments

Zombie Apocalypse lasts for 3 minutes

Zombie Apocalypse lasts for 3 minutes

Washington, D.C.- Following an alarming number of calls to the CDC, FBI, and NSA, security analyst have concluded that the zombie apocalypse came and went without any causalities and $0 in property damage.

Current Secretary of Defense, Chuck Hagel, spoke on the matter, “Around 5:03 a.m. eastern standard time, a zombie uprising started near Deer Lick, Kentucky. The uprising promptly ended 3 minutes later, apparently due to the fact that zombies lack muscle tissue.”
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Posted in Health, World News9 Comments

BUSTED! GlossyNews.com Faked Charlie Hebdo-Style Attack to Cash In on Expanded Readership

BUSTED! GlossyNews.com Faked Charlie Hebdo-Style Attack to Cash In on Expanded Readership

“Absolutely despicable!” stated loyal Glossy fan Jason Nimknuts when he found out about it. “I knew they could be low, but I would never have imagined them stooping to this! Dumb bastards!”

After seeing the famed French satire magazine Charlie Hebdo’s sales go into the stratosphere when their new issue came out only two weeks after their office personnel were gunned down by Islamic extremists, the publisher and crew of Glossy News Website, a Seattle based Ruppert Murdochesque media conglomerate, got the bright idea to make their own little tragedy. Continue Reading

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Posted in World News3 Comments

Kimmy’s Hate Train Still Boarding Passengers

Kimmy’s Hate Train Still Boarding Passengers

North Korean dictator and renowned chunky monkey Kim Jong Un continues on his world famous crazy train picking up more passengers at every stop.

We’re making a North Korea satire film. Click here to help our fundraising!

Not content with detonating possibly real nuclear devices and bombing the hell out of random waters in the Sea of Japan, Kimmy has expanded his narrow horizons. Continue Reading

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Posted in Video News, World News0 Comments

Nightmares Prompt Kim Jong-un to Take Up Zumba

Nightmares Prompt Kim Jong-un to Take Up Zumba

Apparently, fear of his dead father is resurfacing in a big way and has been keeping N. Korean supreme leader Kim Jong-un up nights for well over a year now.

The leader is said to be suffering from an ongoing bout of the vapors, leaving him feeling puny and out of sorts.

A recurring nightmare finds the North Korean leader face-to-face with his not-so-dead father who is taking the pudgy little tyrant to task for not being such a tyrant after all. Continue Reading

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Posted in World News1 Comment

Japanese Encouraged to Get Laid More

Japanese Encouraged to Get Laid More

Faced with a declining birth rate and an ever growing elderly population, Japanese citizens are being encouraged to have more sex.

“Japanese men and women seemed to have lost interest in sex!” said prominent Japanese legislative leader Seiko Noda. “We need to stimulate the people’s interest in sex before the whole country disappears!”

Noda proposes a government sponsored “get laid now” campaign to stimulate the libido of Japanese citizens. Under the proposal, citizens will be provided with erotic literature, sexy lingerie, lubricating lotions, edible panties, fishnet stocking and bondage equipment such as whips and chains.

“We will not provide condoms or French Ticklers because that would defeat the whole purpose!” Noda explained.

In a recent survey 38% of Japanese men and 39% of Japanese women between the ages of 18 and 34 admit they have never had sex at all.

“I’ve had a couple of blow jobs”, said 28 year old Shinjo Ichikawa. “But I have never put my dick in a vagina”.

Experts claim that Japanese women simply aren’t interested in the tiny penises Japanese men have in relation to white or black men.

“I just like to play with myself”, said 24 year old Akiko Shonokane. “I have a career. I don’t have time for little Japanese penises. And it’s so hard to find a gaijin (foreigner)”.

“We may have to open our doors to foreigners in order to interest more women in sex’, said Prime Minister Shinzo Abe.

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Posted in World News0 Comments

Free Speech Freaks Given New Hope in Ribbing North Korea

Free Speech Freaks Given New Hope in Ribbing North Korea

Prominent, but still sub-viral site GlossyNews.com has launched a Go Fund Me campaign to create a free-to-dowload video criticizing the regime.

The goal is to create a wicked, biting satirical film criticizing the totalitarian dynastic regime in North Korea.

The film would feature paid actors, paid crew and a tight production schedule. Continue Reading

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Posted in Talky Pictures, World News1 Comment

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