Tag Archive | "fox news"

Juan Williams vs Byron Williams – A Real Snapshot of Media Bias

Lets call this the case of two Williams.

It is a case study in the state of the journalism system in this country. Everyone has heard of the case of Juan Williams getting fired by NPR over some lukewarm comments he made about being nervous seeing traditional Muslims boarding the same airplane he was using. FOX News made sure the whole world knew about it. An interesting side to this is that there is a much more vivid story about another Williams that didn’t get near as much media play, but yet was more dramatic. Read the full story


Posted in Serious CommentaryComments (13)

Open Letter to Undermining, Commie-Pinko Socialists


The situation is dire!
Our plans lay fast in rubble before us!

Our goal to subjugate the great capitalistic tyrant the United States and lead them to the glories of socialism has run aground. The attempt to sneak Marx-Engels philosophies into the pattern of American politics has been uncovered again and again by the ever intrepid FOX News and their highly elite and patriotic staff. Read the full story


Posted in Opinion/Editorial, PoliticsComments (2)

FOX Struggles To Replace “Fair And Balanced” With More Accurate Slogan.

FOX News, painfully aware of the hypocrisy behind their using of the motto ‘Fair And Balanced’ when it is obvious to all with at least two eyes in their head that they are a major blow-horn for right wing shills, is trying to come up with a slogan that is more true to their nature. “Let The Masses Have The Luxury of Ignorance” had already been used by Hitler, so they are forced to use their limited creativity to come up with a new one. Many at the station are angrily dogmatic about preserving the “Fair And Balanced” logo, but they tend to be the unbalanced ones who are in the majority. The clearer sighted ones realize the need for a change tend to quit and become Democrats, but there are still a few who, behind their coke bottled glasses, know that it is time to do some serious self analysis and call in image tweakers to do it for them.
Some of the possible choices being thrown around are: Read the full story


Posted in Politics, TelevisionComments (17)

Yet Another Outbreak of Rabies at FOX News

MINOT, North Dakota (GlossyNews) — The recent outbreak of rabies, the madness inducing disease spread by biting that has infected the major stars of Fox News Station, has spread far beyond the confines of their offices. In a new evolution of the disease it appears that it has the ability to leap over the airwaves and infect its listeners, turning them into politically monotonic drones, much like brainless zombies constantly ranting the same tired phrases over and over. Read the full story


Posted in Health, TelevisionComments (26)

How to be a FOX News ‘Spin Doctor’

SINGAPORE (GlossyNews) — Media experts have been observing a recent trend in how seemingly simple events are portrayed by our news sources. Radical interpretations of ordinary incidents in the lives of the famous seem to be going through major distortions. How we perceive events in our reality is colored by prejudices, opinions and attitudes that we already have present in our minds. Nowhere is this more evident than in the world of politics. Take an example from a day in the life of President Obama as seen by a normal person and as seen by the agents of FOX News: Read the full story


Posted in Entertainment, SocietyComments (4)

Glenn Beck Audience at Record Levels – Liberals Stunned

The highly viewed FOX television show The Glenn Beck Show has surged upward in viewership the last few weeks with the media industry Nomitron Ratings at an unheard of 9.4 high. The only other broadcast to hit anywhere near this mark was Kennedy’s assassination, the moon landing in 1969, and Princess Diana’s death, and of course the pilot episode of the 1983 miniseries “V”, which had a 22 share. Read the full story


Posted in Strange People, TelevisionComments (2)

FOX News Has a Tough Time Telling the Black Chess Pieces Apart as Well

A big stink arose this past week when Greta van Susteren, intellectual extraordinaire of FOX News (indeed perhaps the only one. How did she get in there?) mistook Shirley Sherrod, the black Georgia State Director Of Rural Development, with California Democrat Maxine Waters. Sherrod recently gave a speech on her coming to understand the plight of white farmers, which was misconstrued to much acclaim by a right wing blogger. Read the full story


Posted in News In Your BriefsComments (1)

Unemployed Veteran Forgets Mother’s Birthday

BUFFALO, New York (GlossyNews) — In what Tri-State area Tea Party leaders are calling further evidence of our culture’s collapse, 38-year-old Lance Kilbane, an unemployed welder, has forgotten to honor his mother on her birthday.

Speaking to reporters while completing a Taco Bell employment application, Kilbane struggled to put an acceptable face on his unforgiveable negligence toward the woman who carried him inside her body for nine months. Read the full story


Posted in Human Interest, PoliticsComments (0)

Worried Investors Turn to Aluminum

Arkadelphia, AR (GlossyNews) — As fears of a sluggish recovery keep stock markets anemic, more investors are seeking safe haven in aluminum; a metal some call the new platinum.

The shift comes as a surprise, even to Wall Street insiders. Gordon Gecko, of investment bank Guildenstern & Rosecrantz said, “The thing’s really weird. The aluminum market should be dead, but it’s like it doesn’t know that.”

Your Glossy News reporter got to the bottom of the mess; it’s a tangled tale of complexity that staggers the imagination. But first, the boring stuff…

Continued strength in aluminum defies orthodox business models. Read the full story


Posted in Biz NewsComments (0)

Really Big Important News Story

Santiago, Chile (GlossyNews) — Posted by your new South America correspondents, Maria and Consuela Lopez.

In a Glossy News exclusive, Maria Lopez has learned there is a crazy conspiracy where Brazil, Turkey and Iran all want to get nuclear weapons. For those of you who don’t know, nuclear bombs are dangerous. Turkey and Iran signed a deal with Brazil, where something called Uranium will get enriched, and they all get bombs to drop on their neighbors.

—Hermana, that’s not what is going on. Lula da Silva is trying to carve out a neutral ground between the gringos and that crazy retro Neo-Marxist nativist bloc currently led by Chavez. Brazil has every right to assert itself on the world stage, and try to ease tensions— Read the full story


Posted in SocietyComments (0)

Glossy News Names New South America Bureau Chief(s)

South America (GlossyNews) — Industry insiders are saying reclusive, mysterious media titan Brian K. White has struck again, in his seemingly relentless march to replace Rupert Murdoch as the planet’s leading purveyor of nonsense.

In the wake of famed journalist Blake Pennywhistle’s mysterious disappearance, White spoke to reporters today from a secure, undisclosed location. “Nobody will miss Blake more than I. It puts a hole in my heart that will forever be there, blah blah blah. I’m glad he’s not sending e-mail to my teenage daughter any more, I will say that. I don’t think space aliens abducted Blake, mostly because I don’t know what space aliens would want with $7358 in cash that seems to be missing. Read the full story


Posted in Books, Newspapers & MiscComments (0)

Secret Murdoch Tapes Threaten to Expose Palin and Beck as Puppets

At Sea, South Pacific (GlossyNews) — Rumors are swirling in back alleys and executive washrooms about the handful of tapes that, if made public, could blow the lid off Rupert Murdoch’s hold on American politics, bringing Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, and others down with him in the fallout. Read the full story


Posted in Celebrity Gossip, TelevisionComments (0)

Glenn Beck Found Naked, Confused Wandering Along Highway

New Canaan, Connecticut – Fox Television and radio personality, Glenn Beck was found wandering along Merritt Parkway close to his home in New Canaan, Connecticut early Thursday morning around 2 a.m. He was naked and confused and muttering “don’t freakin’ tread on me, don’t freakin’ tread on Glenn Beck, for I am your Savior,” and was taken to the nearest hospital for observation. He was openly weeping. Read the full story


Posted in Celebrity Gossip, TelevisionComments (3)

Huckabee Compares Werewolves to Zombies

Fort Smith, Ark-Kansas (GlossyNews) — Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee hasn’t announced his plans for 2012, but the FOX News commenter has lately been stressing his cultural values credentials. Speaking this week to UC Berkeley’s College Republican Union, Huckabee hit hard on the topic of Werewolves.

He told Kate, Bob and Xi Liang, “You young people are on the front lines in a war against creeping deviancy. There are so many who’ve chosen a lifestyle, and they want you to accept them as normal, and feel sympathy for them. It’s just wrong, these Werewolves. God made each of us a species, and we’re not supposed to go around switching species every time the moon comes out.” Read the full story


Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

Democrats Euthanize Elderly to Make Snack Foods

Macon, GA (GlossyNews) — Intrepid FOX News reporters have uncovered a heinous Left Wing plot to do in America’s older generation. While many were declaring the hard right’s scary threats that the Left was going to let older citizens die out, it turns out that the truth is even darker yet. FOX has acquired evidence that a Democratic backed organization is spiriting Medicare and, Social Security recipients to a secret location, mass gassing them, then processing their bodies into a dog food. This pooch munch is then sold through the firm Soylent Green Really Yummie Pet Food Company. Read the full story


Posted in HealthComments (0)

Check Out This Guy’s Birth Certificate

On a Private Island in the Pacific (GlossyNews) — There is a man whose birth certificate should be given a lot of scrutiny. No, he is not Obama. This guy is whiter than Wonder Bread. He has done more to influence American policy in the last 10 years than possibly anyone else. And he is not an American. And he influences it in whatever way is advantageous to himself.

Say Hello to Rupert Murdoch, Australian born and raised media giant who is the brains and the motivator behind FOX News and their insistent anti-everything banter. Read the full story


Posted in Biz NewsComments (5)

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