Jap Granny Set to Kung Fu Chop Competition
A 94-years-old Japanese widow and grandmother of six is hoping to beat George Foreman’s record as the oldest fighter to win a World Boxing Association title. Miko Kamikaze, since ‘coming out’ and declaring her FemDom lesbian sexual orientation at the…
US Fathers Pledge to Model Obama: Promise Kids Puppy If Elected President
Taking up the difficult charge requested of the nation’s newest president, fathers around the country have stepped up to make difficult choices and keep hope alive in the next generation. Many are doing this by emulating the exact behavior of…
Sharon Osbourne’s Reputation as Typical Bee-Hotch Unbroken
I’ve seen that Sharon Osbourne and wondered how much of the icy face we see is put on by MTV and how much of it is the machinations of her own inner demons. Between the erratic behavior on her American…
Three Reasons Obama Will Not Be Assassinated
With President Elect Obama within days of inauguration as the first black president of these United States, and tensions still running extremely high from the divisive campaigns run by all of the serious GOP contenders, there is very real talk,…
God Answers McCain’s Prayers with Resounding “No”
God, highest imagined power in all the universe, perhaps best known as the creator of day and night, took a few minutes away from his daily chore of answering billions of prayers for wealth, fame and sexual partners to publicly…
WNHL Combines Canada’s Two Greatest Exports
Perhaps you’ve heard of Canada, it’s the nation inconveniently separating the contiguous United States from the industrious state of Alaska. Despite their reputation as a nation “not having a reputation,” marketing executives have come up with a product that will…
Bush Commands AF-1 Due South to Greenland, Stays the Course
Mere minutes into Air Force One’s flight from Andrews Air Force Base to Greenland, it was reported that President Bush entered the flight deck with commands to “Continue your southerly heading.” The President, known for his resolve, was undeterred by…
Dane Cook Rocks Veritable Asses in Seatte
Dane Cook appeared live at the Key Arena in Seattle last Thursday, and my hopes were too high to be anything but disappointed. First of all, he’s in the top-5 stand-up comics of our time. Secondly, I’ve already seen everything…
China Promises Fake Lunar Landing by 2008
China’s space program has enjoyed successes at a price previously unmatched by any space program. Not the US nor former Soviet Union, not even Canadians have been able to make strides in pace with the Chinese,, and not even because…
Muppet Agenda Leads to Loose Jell-O Complacence
First we had to deal with the Diaper Industrial Complex, then the Hardline Pro-Potty Training Movement. Now I have to deal with the Muppet Agenda and the influence it has on people around me. It’s bad enough they teach kids that…