Category: Politics
Nation of Self-Obsessed Attention Hogs Whine About Sea Levels Rising Due to Climate Change
FUNAFUTI, TUVALU– After years of whining and moaning about possible ecological devastation and flooding which would render their entire country uninhabitable, little Tuvalu finally got its moment in the sun when the international press threw the petulant brats a handful…
Trump Claims NYT Op-Eds Unfair
Washington, DC (NYT) A frustrated President Trump apparently unloaded on his advisors that the “Failing” New York Times recent publication of quite erudite Op-Eds by Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders is not fair. He was heard to lament, “my speciality…
TRUMP NEWS CONFERENCE IN THE NEAR FUTURE
Good afternoon, vile, evil, smelly, ugly, evil, evil members of the third-rate reporters who should kill themselves in a disgusting horrible – the pussies should throw acid in their faces. Let’s forget the virus for now. So, so depressing although…
Trumpisms and Virusisms 8.0
226 Suggestion — Instead of calling coronavirus the “Chinese virus,” let’s call it the “Trump virus” or “Donny’s hoax.” 227 How to enforce social distancing — add to the nation’s water supply a chemical that induces mild autism so we…
Trump Names Jared and Ivanka Ventilator Co-Czars
Washington, DC (AP) At yesterday’s White House press briefing President Trump made the stunning announcement that his daughter Ivanka and her husband Jared Kushner, by Executive Order # 1001, will assume the newly created positions of Ventilator co-Czars. The action…
Donald Rumsfeld Emerges from Underground Lair asking, “Am I no longer the most evil Donald?”
Suspected reptillian and confirmed demon Donald Rumsfeld, the gleeful architect of no fewer than all deaths in the Middle East (2001-2009) permitted the light of day to wash across his face in a rare instance of seeming mortality Wednesday. “Wait,”…
Trump orders Barr to Investigate Mother Nature for Insider Trading
Trump orders Barr to Investigate Mother Nature for Insider Trading Washington, DC (AP). In a bold show of insane “kaka” the President last week conveyed to his favourite Fox news slime—Lou Dobbs (aka LouDo)—an autographed exhibit showing a 1900 point…
BREAKING NEWS! TRUMP LEARNS CORONAVIRUS ABC’S!”
As everyone knows, President Trump fails to grasp the danger of the coronavirus pandemic because nobody has bothered to explain it to him in ways he’ll understand.
Super Tuesday Looms Large For Oklahoma
There are pros and cons to being one of the states that’s involved in Super Tuesday. The pros are largely the fact that you can have a major impact on who ends up running the country – or even stands…
Trumpisms 7.0: Another One for Luck!
184 Cause of the pandemic? Trump’s reign became toxic and his tweets went viral.