Category: Top Stories
Man Sacked for Wearing Arsenal Jersey
NAIROBI, Kenya – An employee of Kenya Airways, Kenya’s national airline was apparently sacked for wearing an Arsenal FC (football club) tee shirt to a Kenya Airways sponsored event at the Masai Mara. Eyewitnesses say a Mr. Bosire, (former) corporate…
GlossyNews Hire Writers Who Wrote Text Over Jong Un Uncle’s Execution
Glossy News is viciously striving to beat all the other spoof news websites fighting tooth and nail to hire the writer who wrote the fiery rhetoric slamming North Korea’s President’s Jong Un’s uncle on national news. The former second in…
“Old Man” Winter Relinquishes Control to Son Biff
Old Man Winter has reportedly turned over operational control of the winter season to his son, Biff according to sources close to the personification of nature. Citing health issues, Old Man Winter made the announcement in late November and his…
Robopundit Alex Castellanos Soft Sells Republican Anarchism
Dateline: PALO ALTO—Robotics Corp, a Fortune 500 company, treated reporters to a behind-the-scenes look at the manufacturing of their pre-programmed artificial persons for use in selling conservative policies in the United States. The featured model is called the Alex Castellanos,…
Likud Party Withdraws Support, Obama Government Collapses
WASHINGTON, D.C. – After several long hours of wrangling over the type of missiles to employ when the United States strikes Tehran next week, the Likud Party withdrew its support from President Barack Obama’s governing coalition, causing it to fall…
Millions Mourn South African Terrorist
JOHANNESBURG – With wails running free across the air, millions of grieving humans gathered in Sandton Square on Friday afternoon to mourn the passing of a great and respected national terrorist from South Africa. Participants interviewed expressed an almost uniform…
Kris Kringle Appointed Head of NSA
Phoenix, AZ- He sees you when you’re sleeping, he knows when you’re awake. Now he hears who you are talking to so be good for goodness sake. The “Jolly Old Man,” otherwise known as Kris Kringle has been appointed to…
Drug Makers Reintroduce Measles to America
Spokespersons for GlaxoSmithKline, Merk, Pfizer and other makers of immunization therapies stated today that the pharmaceutical industry is reintroducing the measles virus to America. “The measles virus was eradicated throughout most of the world”, said Pfizer spokesperson Juliette Riposs. “Fewer…
Movement for New State “North Colorado” Meets Opposition from Reality
“What makes no sense is the current movement by 10 counties in northern Colorado and a few in Nebraska and Kansas to band together to make a new state called North Colorado.” – The New York Times – July 11,…
Jesus Just Assumed That Republicans Knew About His Socialist Leanings
WASHINGTON D.C. – Speaking amid right-wing concerns that the United States is slowly becoming a socialist nation, Jesus Christ insisted Thursday that he just sort of assumed that members of the Republican Party – which comprises some of his most…