Category: Entertainment
The Many (questionable) Roads To Success
So many are struggling in our current difficult economic times where the few controlling the financial strings of the country have the rest of us dancing around just to survive while they watch from the porches of their grand estates…
Girls Stab Friend in Honor of Slenderman; Glad it Wasn’t in the Back
Two girls were arrested by the Bureau of Academic and Constitutional Owners for Niggas force for allegedly stabbing a girl after trying to prove the existence of the Photoshopped myth “Slenderman”. When questioned by the judge, the two girls responded…
Seth MacFarlane’s Penis Found Dead
Seth MacFarlane, creator of such ground-breaking animated hits as “Family Guy” and “American Dad” discovered his own badly decomposed penis dead in a ravine in rural Arizona. MacFarlane had reported his penis missing a week earlier. He stumbled upon it…
Facebook Funeral for Computer Game Enthusiast
TOLEDO – Zed Rigby, 65, a life-long computer game enthusiast, died in his home in Toledo, Ohio last Monday. Mr. Rigby leaves behind no family or actual friends, but a number of his virtual friends are now engaged in virtual…
Corman Creates Catastrophe, Kubrick Cringes
Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey was a huge hit in 1968 and also something of a revolution in science fiction filmmaking. Previous science fiction films had been heavily action-oriented and even frivolous, generally featuring aliens in unconvincing rubber suits…
Gwyneth Paltrow Fitted for Muzzle, Treated for Diarrhea of the Mouth
Los Angeles, CA – Some people don’t know when to shut up. Such is the case with actress Gwyneth Paltrow. Her mouth has gotten her in hot water with critics again and, this time, drastic measures have been taken to…
“Gays of Future Past” Promotes X-rated Agenda
Once again, Hollywood is seeking to undermine time-tested family values. First it was The Dark Knight Rises, featuring its new villain, Bane, as a direct attack on the Romney campaign. Then came Frozen, with its ideals of female independence and…
Former MTV Host Arrested For Breaking Into Sirius/XM Headquarters
New York City – Mark Goodman, a former VJ from the 1980’s heyday of MTV, was hauled away in handcuffs last week after being caught hitting the button that turns all Sirius/XM radios on, regardless of whether the customer has…
Walt Disney Raises Ticket Prices From Beyond the Grave
Anaheim, California – The Disney Corporation announced a $4 per ticket price increase this week for general admission tickets to both its Disneyland and Disney World theme parks. Disney executives cited the rising cost of power as the main reason…
Julianna Rose Maurielo, Stephanie from LazyTown, Dead of Apparent Suicide Overdose
Beloved and coveted former child actress and sex icon Julianna Rose Mauriello was found dead in her Bangkok apartment where she was staying while filming an upcoming feature. “Stephanie [from] LazyTown was on TV, I’m told,” said coroner Panupong Mantri….