Posted in Celebrity Gossip Music

Jack and Diane Done: John Mellencamp Divorces

After 4 multi-platinum records, 6 platinum records, three gold records, and a string of four consecutive records that achieved no real status due to high amounts of sucking, John Mellencamp is ending his 20 years marriage, citing “it’s none of…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Jack and Diane Done: John Mellencamp Divorces
Posted in Biz News

Chinese Ports Await Massive Christmas Cash Delivery

The Chinese ports of Shanghai and Shenzhen are preparing to unload dozens of giant freighters. The ships are filled to the brim with cash made from selling Americans millions of tons of cheap junk over the Christmas holidays. Fueled by…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Chinese Ports Await Massive Christmas Cash Delivery
Posted in Celebrity Gossip Sports Scandals

Dwight Freeney Learning to Take the “Free” Out of His Name

Those who follow NFL apparently know who Dwight Freeney is, even if most of America, and the landlord on his recording studio, haven’t heard a peep from him. He’s being sued for $422,150 in back rent on the studio, a…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Dwight Freeney Learning to Take the “Free” Out of His Name
Posted in Music

Willow Smith Knows Who Her Daddy Is, Better Have His Money

According to documents filed by Roc Nation, the Jay-Z owned record label of Willow Smith, the hip-hop tween isn’t an artist, which is something anyone who has heard her music would agree. So what is the daughter of Will Smith?…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Willow Smith Knows Who Her Daddy Is, Better Have His Money
Posted in Biz News

Post Office Devises Uniquely Dastardly Ways to “Reduce” Staff

Post Offices across the U.S., faced with the necessity of laying off 40,000 employees, have come up with unique methods of accomplishing this goal. The administrators at the main distribution center in Denver, Colorado have set up a scam where…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Post Office Devises Uniquely Dastardly Ways to “Reduce” Staff
Posted in News In Your Briefs

2011 Tall Tale Congressional Cocktail

Just in time for New Years festivities, try to see if you can stomach this tasty treat from the hill. 1 Tea Bag with string 2-3 minutes of warm John of Orange tears 2 jiggers VS cognac 1 dash bitter…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! 2011 Tall Tale Congressional Cocktail
Posted in Celebrity Gossip Travel

Snow Miser put on ‘No Fly’ list

Mr. Snow Miser who played, well the ‘Snow Miser’, on the hit Christmas television special, The Year Without a Santa Claus, discovered to his dismay that he has been put on the TSA’s ‘No Fly’ list. Mr. Miser, who was…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Snow Miser put on ‘No Fly’ list
Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc

Media Boycotts Year in Review Stories, “It wasn’t that memorable a year”

In a rare show of solidarity, all news outlets have agreed to cancel ‘Year in Review’ retrospectives for 2010. The late December fluff pieces have long been a staple of American journalism, due in large part to the low skill…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Media Boycotts Year in Review Stories, “It wasn’t that memorable a year”
Posted in Making Headlines

Socialism Is When Corporations Get Bailout Money From the Federal Government

Capitalism is when you blame all the economic woes on Obama.

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Socialism Is When Corporations Get Bailout Money From the Federal Government
Posted in Celebrity Gossip

Octomom May Be Saved by Vivid Entertainment’s Lingering Low-Def Division

TMZ is reporting that Octomom’s Nadya Suleman may not face a second foreclosure, due to her failure to pay her damned bills already. Fans and critics alike agree that she’s a worthless pail of hot garbage, but could this unholy…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Octomom May Be Saved by Vivid Entertainment’s Lingering Low-Def Division