Category: Top Stories
Saga of Baby Munoz Brings Joy to the OC
DATELINE: Waco, TX — Many followed the tragic case of Marlise Munoz for the last 6 weeks with anxiety, anguish and great compassion. This was an ethical dilemma wherein, under the protection of Texas law, an unborn fetus remained in…
Duck Dynasty Unveils New Line Of Dog Whistle Calls
Dogpatch, LA – Willie Robertson, CEO and patriarch in waiting for the Duck Dynasty Empire has announced a new line of silent dog whistle calls for non hunters to be rolled out in 2014. The initial lineup will include four…
The NFL’s Big Taxpayer Heist
Now that the Super Bowl is over and you are either in euphoric heaven or the depths of despair depending upon your gridiron loyalties, let me proceed to burst your little bubble: the NFL is ripping you off. Due to…
Woody Allen–A (Inappropriate) Touching Story
Woody Allen’s adopted daughter, Dylan Farrow, finally came out in the open, to the world, about the abuse she suffered at the hand of her adopted father, Woody Allen. This is my reaction. I can’t remember the last time I…
Business down the drainpipe for Mario Brothers
WORKERS have spoken of their sadness at a family run plumbing business has gone bust after 33 years trading. A group of plumbers in Louisville, KY announced last night that, the Mario Brothers Plumbing Ltd was to go into administration…
Mass Murderer Calls Republicans Soft on Satanic Values
Dateline: LOS ANGELES—In a documentary about the life of the infamous anarchist and sadistic mass murder, Max Truculence, Mr. Truculence criticizes American conservatives for being “soft-hearted, effeminate phonies.” He spoke from prison, since he’s currently serving a thousand year sentence…
Bridge-gate? Mayor Cokeford? Fuggedaboutit, eh?
Most political scandals in America have a Washington connection. Think Watergate, Abscam, Iran-Contra and Clinton-Lewinsky. In the case of the maelstrom surrounding Chris Christie, however, the Washington connection happens to be the George Washington Bridge spanning New Jersey and Manhattan….
Japan Announces Invasion of Palau
Taiji, Japan – Looking to capitalize on recent international public relations success over last week’s dolphin slaughter in Taiji, Japan announced today its intention to invade and conquer the tiny pacific island nation of Palau sometime in 2014. At a…
Billionaire Tom Perkins Tweets Walk-Back of Holocaust Comment
San Francisco, CA – Silicon Valley venture capitalist legend Tom Perkins who came under fire for misguided comments comparing the treatment of the rich to holocaust victims responded to critics today on Twitter. “Seriously, I simply don’t understand this obsession…
GOP Blames Rise in Lesbianism on Obama Administration
On Tuesday night, President Barack Obama gave his 5th State of the Union address. It was a mixed bag, if you ask anyone who was listening. As usual, Obama failed in his attempt to bring the country to a closer…