Archive | War Zone

Glossy News Book Showcase 4: Laurie Calhoun’s We Kill Because We Can!

Glossy News Book Showcase 4: Laurie Calhoun’s We Kill Because We Can!

NOTE FROM WALLACE:

I am here reproducing some quotes relating to Laurie’s book. I have edited the following text from an existing promotional text.

What people are saying about We Kill Because We Can:

Continue Reading

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, War Zone0 Comments

The Paris Tragedies

The Paris Tragedies

Note from Wallace:

This essay from Appleseed Ike appeared very early in the history of the Neocon Surveillance site, and the Peace Criminals Project more generally.

These meditations are particularly poignant in light of further terrorist tragedies and atrocities in recent times, including Berlin.

Thank you, Ike! Continue Reading

Posted in War Zone, World News0 Comments

The Jig is Up: Just War Theory Can No Longer Be Used as a Cover for State Policies of Mass Homicide

The Jig is Up: Just War Theory Can No Longer Be Used as a Cover for State Policies of Mass Homicide

For more than fifteen years—a sizeable chunk of my adult life—I have been criticizing the just war paradigm which has undergirded calls for war by the leaders of states for centuries. My first essay on the topic was published in 2000: “The Injustice of Just Wars,” but that was only the beginning. I also published essays on “legitimate authority”, the dehumanization of soldiers in the just war framework, the “metaethical paradox” of just war theory, the incompatibility of universal human rights with just war theory, and so-called “humanitarian intervention”, which is even more hawkish than the traditional framework, insisting as it does on the necessity–rather than the permissibility–of going to war (see publications list). Continue Reading

Posted in Serious Commentary, War Zone0 Comments

NASTY Politician Memes

NASTY Politician Memes

War in Yemen, William Hague, Dick Cheney, Samantha Power, Obama…

Gotta love these guys! Continue Reading

Posted in War Zone, World News0 Comments

Glossy News Classics (III): Kilroy’s ‘4 Out of 5 Republicans in Anonymous Survey Admit to Liking Dick’

Glossy News Classics (III): Kilroy’s ‘4 Out of 5 Republicans in Anonymous Survey Admit to Liking Dick’

NOTE FROM WALLACE:

Some satire is refined, sophisticated, and classy; see, for example, The Satirist of Dan Geddes. 

But sometimes, you can’t be arsed with a steak filet, and you just want a nice, greasy, roadkill hamburger!

I hope you will perceive this as one of the most pointedly prominent Dick jokes in the history of the satire media!

And another article tomorrow will point you to some more of them…

***

Support for Dick Cheney and former President George Bush to be prosecuted for torture appear to have fallen faster than an erection in Hillary Clinton’s presence according to inside sources. Continue Reading

Posted in Top Stories, War Zone2 Comments

Good Kill: A Good Anti-Recruitment Movie

Good Kill: A Good Anti-Recruitment Movie

Good Kill (US release 2015), directed by Andrew Niccol, offers a somewhat surprising view of what has come to be known as “modern warfare”, focusing on the plight of drone operators who spend their work days at Creech Air Force Base “taking pot shots half a world away in an air conditioned cubicle”. Heavily and obviously based on the testimony of former drone operators, the film has been criticized by some for lacking in entertainment value. Given the gravity of this disturbing development in military history, such a criticism seems somehow misplaced, but it is also understandable. Even those of us who appreciate its filmic virtues can scarcely deny that Good Kill is considerably more didactic than most action films. However, it is more professorial than preachy, offering a competent introduction to the moral issues raised by drone warfare for those who never thought about the topic before. Continue Reading

Posted in Talky Pictures, War Zone0 Comments

Gone But Not Forgotten! John Kerry Meme Tribute

Gone But Not Forgotten! John Kerry Meme Tribute

 The High Sultan of Flip-Flop will soon shuffle mournfully off the political scene. But let’s remember some of the highlights of John Kerry’s career.

Continue Reading

Posted in Politics, War Zone0 Comments

An ‘Inconvenient’ Parable

An ‘Inconvenient’ Parable

I wish Tony Blair would just go away.

He’s like a clingy one night stand that keeps calling you up every now and then at 3 am, completely out of the blue, in order to tell you who much he loves you and giving you unsolicited advice about how to live your life and manage your affairs! Continue Reading

Posted in War Zone, World News0 Comments

4 More Reasons Why YOU Should Join ISIS!

4 More Reasons Why YOU Should Join ISIS!

A lot of people were offended by the recent Ten Great Reasons to Join ISIS article by Kilroy.
I found myself at a bit of a loss to write an even edgier article.
However, help is at hand!
Notable Moderate Political Islamist Teddy Ramallah of Cowbridge University has asked me to forward this ISIS recruitment advert to you.
I’m all for tolerance and respecting the sincerely held beliefs of others; diversity is our greatest strength, and as we all share a common humanity, I’m going to respect Teddy Ramallah’s ideological and ethical diversity, just like you ought to respect mine.
We’re all in this together… so, here we go!

#1 License to Kill & Be Killed (Just Like James Bond!)

I mean, I know bitches look down on you and all them white-ass hos don’t give you no pussy. Why don’t you actually get a bit classy so those prissy kafffir girls are actually eating out of your jihadi-bride-whacking fistifcuffs?

#2 No Muh Peer Pressure to Read

I mean, who actually LIKES reading? A lot of jihadists are very intelligent anyway, like Imam Khomeini (peace and blessings of the Dean be upon him), who wrote an entire several-volume book about chicken-fucking and marrying kids. So dump that stupid jaheel college of yours and learn that you actually have something constructive to do in this world. I mean, I can already see you are a better fit here, than there!

 #3 ISIS are anti-imperialists

Iraq and Syria and other apostate countries were carved up from the fall of the Ottoman empire. If you oppose an empire, you are an anti-imperialist! By definition! I mean, how much simpler do I have to say it?

#4 ISIS are Radical Cosmopolitans with a Global Outlook

All we want to do is to abolish all those arbitrary national boundaries that divide and alienate and that capitalists are always taking advantage of in order to oppress and exploit the innocent.
Unlike the racists and nationalists of America, our only desire is to reunited the world and bring about one common humanity and one single global village in peace and universal brotherhood. How many liberal interventionist or neocon infidels have you ever heard saying that?!

***

#HASHTAG

#SORRYIFYOUWEREOFFENDED

#IMEANIHAVEJIHADIFRIENDS

#ONLYACOUPLEMIND

#WELLDEARMEPEOPLEREALLYARESOSENSITIVENOWADAYSARENTTHEY

Continue Reading

Posted in War Zone, World News1 Comment

Have You Ever Thought About Joining ISIS?

Have You Ever Thought About Joining ISIS?

NOTE FROM WALLACE RUNNYMEDE:

We rarely republish pieces at Glossy News, even though the ‘Glossy News Classics’ occasional series will feature some great work from our back catalogue. But this recent piece was so hilarious, we are publishing it again! And a couple of minutes, my humble follow-up will appear here at Glossy News. I am afraid it cannot measure up to Kilroy’s great story here: but hopefully both pieces will be very enjoyable…

And thought-provoking!

Now, what on earth did I mean by that…

!

***

Greetings and salutations dysfunctional Western youth. God is great and so are you! We are ISIS and we are looking for a few good martyrs! Are you that special person who is destined to do great things for a great cause? Then we’re looking for you. Yes you! No, not you, the guy behind you. You there. You!

You didn’t stumble upon this website by accident. You were led here by a greater power. Isn’t that great? But enough polite western salutations and fragile ego stroking of weak infidels soon to die! Did we say that out loud? Sorry. Please allow us to to sing you a subliminal siren’s song about ten great reasons to join ISIS, with a Metallica sound track and nanosecond edited grotesque imagery at regular intervals.

1. Great Tax Breaks—As a member of ISIS you will no longer be required to pay taxes to the imperialist, godless devils of the United States of America. However we do require you make an occasional modest donation to the Martyr’s Fund, which we will use for hookers and booze right after you blow yourself up. Of course we realize such behavior makes us impure but we are willing to take one for the team. After all there is only so much room in Paradise.

2. Great Retirement Plan—Instead of the uncertainty that accompanies the economy you are currently enslaved to, ISIS provides a generous retirement plan for both you and your 72 virgins. Forget that pipe dream of ever owning an IRA and bingo on Wednesday nights… Tell McDonald’s to shove it and retire in the Gardens of Paradise with all of your friends. Continue Reading

Posted in War Zone, World News1 Comment

Thanks for Following SIC October Surprise Data Dump! Next Stop: Blair Fawkes Night!

Thanks for Following SIC October Surprise Data Dump! Next Stop: Blair Fawkes Night!

Although the Peace Criminals Project (Wallace Runnymede) is separate from and indeed unaffiliated with Glossy News (Brian K. White), I play a substantial role in both of these separate projects. Recently here at Glossy News, I spoke of the Peace Criminals Project’s massive ‘October Surprise Data Dump’ at the Satirical-Industrial Complex (SIC) site.

What’s next? Well, November 5 is Guy Fawkes Night, here in the UK. So, in order to bestow a fitting tribute to the proverbial ‘only man to ever enter parliament with good intentions,’ I am running a ‘Blair Fawkes Night’ at SIC! Continue Reading

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, War Zone0 Comments

Gitmo Vs Justice

Gitmo Vs Justice

This is my response to the following article about 5 alleged 9/11 masterminds, who have been held at Gitmo since 2002 still in pre-trial hearings:
https://www.hrw.org/news/2016/07/26/dispatches-guantanamo-9/11-case-staggers

No doubt due in large part to lack of mainstream media attention of ongoing Guantanamo proceedings, many Americans today believe the perpetrators of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack all perished on that day. People are unaware of the fact that the US government has detained five men with alleged connection, at least one of whom is deemed to be a “mastermind.”

Continue Reading

Posted in Serious Commentary, War Zone1 Comment

Clinton vs Weiner: The Democrats Are Screwed?

Clinton vs Weiner: The Democrats Are Screwed?

Where are we and how did we get here?

I am paraphrasing the words of Jim Stockdale in the 1992 US Vice Presidential debate. Those are also the words much of the American electorate asks near Election Day.

A sure vote for corruption and expansionary political and military intervention lies on the Clinton side. We have spent two weeks learning via Wikileaks and the Veritas Project things no one wants for any candidacy.

In Mr Trump, we have a trailing opponent candidate standing strong in the face of some dreary personal failures. We had an October 1st kickoff to the insanity with NY Times release of Trump’s 1995 tax return featuring a $916 million tax loss. Trump’s grandest failure was just six days later with the Billy Bush tapes. Like this past week’s Clinton revelations, the daggers were secured by clandestine means. In this brave new world of ours, it seems few things of import remain permanently hidden even for the shadiest of operators. Continue Reading

Posted in Serious Commentary, War Zone0 Comments

Is a Libertarian Vote for Trump Unconscionable?

Is a Libertarian Vote for Trump Unconscionable?

The US Presidential Election is upon us.

Faced with a binary choice, a Libertarian would rightly consider voting for Mr Trump over Secretary Clinton. Ask yourself which of the two “candidates” has a proven track record of choosing war? Was the Libyan intervention in 2011 a war of choice? As President Obama stated at the Democrat Convention this past summer, no one ever running has been more qualified. That was a subtle statement that after the years of war, drones and regime change, Hillary Clinton is highly aware and capable of expanding the American military presence globally. She deserves no consideration from a Libertarian.

And what of Mr Trump? Continue Reading

Posted in Serious Commentary, War Zone1 Comment

October Surprise! Satirical-Industrial Complex Satire Dump!

October Surprise! Satirical-Industrial Complex Satire Dump!

You’ve met Julian Assange and his October Surprise Data Dump…

Now meet Wallace Runnymede, the Peace Criminals Project, & their October Surprise Satire Dump!

From 30 October to 1 November 2016, Satirical Industrial Complex is dumping an epic heap of anti-establishment satire relating to top presidential candidates, warmongers & the military-industrial complex! Some documents are already seeping through…

Keep following the leaks, and tell all your friends about the dumps.

Let’s do this!

Wallace Runnymede

https://satiricalindustrialcomplex.blogspot.co.uk/

https://peacecriminals.wordpress.com/

Posted in Entertainment, War Zone0 Comments

The Peace Criminals Manifesto

The Peace Criminals Manifesto

The Peace Criminals Project is run by Wallace Runnymede and Appleseed Ike. But we are always looking for new writers to contribute!

In the UK, USA, and many other countries that are subservient to the neoconservative/liberal interventionist consensus, every citizen is a bare object.

A nondescript lump of raw material for voyeuristic inspection and ‘surveillance’ by the ‘Authorities.’

But the old Platonic question may be asked, may it not?…

Who will survey the surveyors?

The anarchists of Big Data, like the bloody-robed tyrant of Shelley’s poem, and of whom Slavoj Zizek speaks so evocatively are God, and King, and Law! Continue Reading

Posted in Internets Tubes, War Zone0 Comments

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