Heidi Creamer, yes, her real name, assaulted her buxom blonde twin sister Holly Creamer, also her real name, over a vibrator.
You think I’m joking, but this isn’t satire, it’s Florida. It’s God’s idea of satire.
Scroll down to watch this, our first ever “Daily News Update,” in which I try to make sense of the day’s headlines for your embetterment and embiggening, and cromulently so. Read more Florida Woman Assaults Twin Over Boyfriend, Vibrator [Video News]