Category: Society
Holy Breast Cancer Batman: Huge Boobie in the Sky
Just when we all thought the National Breast Cancer Foundation had topped itself this month by talking the White House into “glowing pink” for Breast Cancer Awareness Month, many witnessed a rare treat in the western sky on October 31…
Indiana Family Shocked to Find It’s Not 1987
GOSHEN – As most Americans were busy celebrating the coming of 2012 at midnight last night, the Albrecht family of Goshen, Indiana were surprised to find that they had not just ushered in the year 1987. Rocking away the night…
Americans With “Too-Sh**ty-To-Buy” Healthcare Plans Somehow Outraged Rather Than Embarrassed
NEWARK, N.J.– The majority of Americans who have received letters notifying them that their healthcare plans are now legally considered too shitty for insurance companies to sell to citizens of a first-world nation are somehow feeling “anger” instead of the…
Specialty Themed Haunted Houses
In the latest craze to hit the Halloween crowd horror fans are creating Haunted Houses for very specific groups. Each is tailor made to scare the bone marrow out of their target audience. Democratic Party Horror House- Horrors of a…
Elderly Woman Sends Text Message
INDIANAPOLIS – An elderly woman became the talk of her family today after miraculously turning on a cellular phone and successfully typing, and then sending, a 23-word text message to her 18-year-old grandson. Maureen Hamilton, 84, is believed to have…
Woman’s Weight Spirals Worryingly Under Control
YORKTOWN – During the post-Christmas period, friends and relatives of local woman Angela Hartman today noted how, in the last year, the 38-year-old’s weight has spiraled worryingly under control. Insisting that Miss Hartman “looks as if she hasn’t eaten in…
God Getting Worryingly Into Disaster Movies
HEAVEN – In what proved a serious concern for the International Community Saturday, unconfirmed sources described how His Lordship Almighty God has “really been getting into the disaster movie genre recently,” adding: “He’s watched Twister, like, 8 times in the…
All Time Most Horrific Haunted House; The House of Women w/ PMDD
A new haunted house has been set up in Boulder Colorado that seems set to rank as the most frightening of all time- the House Of Women With PMDD. Halloween spook houses are all the rage here on the Front…
MTV Promises to Literally Double Gross by 2015
MTV, long known as the first choice in late-night music and regular hours infomercials and reality porn-fer-tainment has set an ambitious goal; to double their gross by 2015, and they’re committed to scraping the gross bottom of the barrel to…
Fashion Police Accused of Disproportionately Targeting Blacks
LOS ANGELES, CA – An investigation has begun into allegations that members of the fashion police have deliberately set out to target blacks during routine fashion exposes and before-and-after shots. The announcement comes after 2,000,000 eye-witnesses reported seeing singer Beyonce…