Author: Brian White
Self-Driving Electric Cars will Soon Be Free, If You Can Afford One
When I add “self-driving” to “electric car”, you may envision a double-unicorn, but these beasts of legend are right around the corner, and they will be damn near free, assuming you can afford one. Elon Musk has announced that “The…
The Funniest Fortune Cookie Messages
Has anyone else noticed that there’s a day for everything? Women’s day (although we really should even it up and have Men’s Day), Book Day, Non-Smoking Day, Dress Like A Pirate Day etc. Well, the list is growing – September…
Mitch McConnell Totally “¿Amores?” Minority Voters
Another Mitch McConnell campaign video Fact-Checked, another one rated 100% True!, depending on how you feel about beige people. We’ve already fact-checked his Mitch McConnell Supports Women and Mitch Supports your Big Business of Every size, and found them to…
Fact-Check: Mitch McConnell Really Supports Your Big Business: True
Washington outsider and regular everyman Mitch McConnell, Republican senator from Kentucky, has an ad claiming he supports big business, but does he really? Fact-Check: YES! It turns out, true to his claims, Mitch McConnell really does stand up for mega…
Mitch McConnell TV Ad Fact-Checked: True
Washington outsider and advocate for change Mitch McConnell took a bold step this year, effectively crowd-sourcing his campaign commercials to the drooling masses. This inspired strike of utter genius can best be described as “SmarTarded™” in a way Kentuckians may…
Brief Dating Site Blah Blah Whatever [Video]
Dating sites pride themselves on how complicated they are. This site breaks that mold by asking you to do less and less. “Almost nothing, really,” said Byron Dwight, CEO and actual site member. “Just a quick tl;dr of yourself and…
Sex Crazed Teens “Syruping” Leads to Genital Ants
One invariable about teens is that, whether raised in the abstinence-only belt of high teen birth rates, or normal states, kids be getting down and dirty. This latest crazy craze involves young girls, often those from the flag team, dousing…
Man Buys First CD in 12-Years; It’s Macklemore
Mock as you will, but first consider that the man in question is me, and I literally haven’t bought a CD in 12 years. Why the hell would I? I’m not saying I’m a pirate, because I’m not. Perhaps I’ve…
Sports Channel Scrapes Bottom, Covers Mini Golf
There’s nothing elegant about a three-year-old putting madly at a ball he can’t seem to square up on, but it seems one channel has gone the extra mile by making him an internet sensation. The golfer in question is a…
Miracle Whip Forsakes Forlorn Food Gobbler
Kraft, purveyor of many fine foods and some others a bit on the course side. To me, they’re the makers of Miracle Whip, and the miracles were nothing short of canonization-worthy. Yes, I’m talking about the now-discontinued dipping and sammy…