Posted in Health Society

Breadfeeding: What You Need To Know

All across America, parents and their newborns have been latching onto the breadfeeding craze by using an excavated recipe from the ruins of the now extinct restaurant chain, the Olive Garden. Many are being cautious with the new formula as…

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Posted in Politics

Recount On Already Controversial Presidential Election Because Of Illegal Zombie Votes

A recount has been demanded on the already scandalous Bush/Gore 2000 Presidential election by Democrats because it has been discovered that illegal zombies have been allowed to vote. Apparently in their over-exuberance to get people out to vote Republican campaigners…

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Posted in Politics

Wolfe Wrong, You Can Go Home Again, and It’s Probably Time

According to the title of the Thomas Wolfe novel, you can’t go home again. But it looks like Lebron James is going to prove that saying wrong as he happily returns to the site of his first professional basketball success:…

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Posted in Politics

“Yucky World” w/Dick and Janey: Presidential Bowing Policy

Announcer: With Dick and Janey on vacation this week, we will be rerunning an earlier interview with Mr. J. Foghill Bottom, the State Department’s resident specialist on diplomatic etiquette. Because President Obama was criticized early in his presidency for bowing…

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Posted in Environment

Lame Duck Damaged, Begs Extinction

Environmentalists and naturalists have sounded the alarm for a threatened avian species resident in Washington, D.C. Having been spotted in the region for close to six years, this bird has recently suffered numerous setbacks and setblacks and appears to be…

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Posted in Crime Music Religionism

Belfast Residents Finally Break Silence on 12th of July Nick Minaj Insult

Belfast residents have finally made their feelings known (as people up North undoubtedly do best) regarding a little-known sectarian atrocity from the most recent 12th of July… When a loyalist flute band surrounded a Catholic youth club and started playing…

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