Posted in Society

PETA Launches Jackass Campaign

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) announced this week an ambitious new initiative aimed at changing the way people perceive mules. The program was announced by PETA spokesperson Barb Arians in an emotional, sometimes acrimonious press conference. “This…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! PETA Launches Jackass Campaign
Posted in Crime

Grandma Foils Would-Be Carjacker with Bag of Doggie Doo

Cecelia (Cece) Hudson is being hailed as one tough grandma this morning after reports of an attempted hijacking of her precious 1994 Honda Accord met with dismal failure. Due to her quick thinking and a conveniently placed bag of fresh…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Grandma Foils Would-Be Carjacker with Bag of Doggie Doo
Posted in Politics Sportsfolk

Elway-Manning for America 2012

Area man Peyton Manning had just gotten laid off from work. Within 48 hours, he knew what he had to do. He hopped on a plane and headed to Denver. John Elway, Broncos exec, was waiting for him. “Sorry about…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Elway-Manning for America 2012
Posted in Politics

VP 2012: Mitt’s Pick gets Nitpicked

ON THE GOPTEA™ TRAIL —GlossyNews Inevitable, unstoppable, charismatic Juggernaut Willard ‘Mitt’ Romney faced heated questioning this week on the issue of VP selection. The name Rand Paul has been surfacing with increased frequency among Romney confidantes, leading some election watchers…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! VP 2012: Mitt’s Pick gets Nitpicked
Posted in Politics

Gingrich Charged With Felonious Photoshopping

WASHINGTON DC –GlossyNews Newt Gingrich, politician and part-time front runner in the GOPTea™ presidential race, has been charged with “the gravest, most evil transgression that humanity has ever been subjected to.” An activist group claims Mr. Gingrich has been illegally…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Gingrich Charged With Felonious Photoshopping
Posted in Human Interest

Newly Discovered Da Vinci Masterpiece Stirs Controversy

Among connoisseurs of great art, the giants who are known by a single name comprise a very short list. We have Raphael, Rembrandt, Picasso, Michelangelo, and of course [Thomas] Kinkade. But perhaps none of these can compare with the magic…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Newly Discovered Da Vinci Masterpiece Stirs Controversy
Posted in Religionism

Pat Robertson Puts Hit on Manning

Pat Robertson put a cosmic bounty on quarterback Peyton Manning, damning him to be injured this season as retribution for the Denver Broncos getting rid of Tim Tebow. “Hey, The Saints had the same system. Never second-guess a saint,” said…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Pat Robertson Puts Hit on Manning
Posted in Biz News

Charlie Brown-Lucy Reunion Ends Badly

Another chapter in the long history of unintended consequences was written this week, as two former child stars found themselves in the no longer adoring media spotlight. By all accounts, things began innocently enough at the Aaron Burr High School…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Charlie Brown-Lucy Reunion Ends Badly
Posted in Education

Discrimination 101 Being Taught in Georgia Schools

While education money is tight right now all across America, parents in the State of Georgia needn’t worry. By combining math with any number of other subjects, some cash-strapped Georgia teachers are finally able to stretch those education dollars and…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Discrimination 101 Being Taught in Georgia Schools
Posted in Sports

Manning Joins Broncos, Tebow Converts to Paganism

DENVER, Colorado – “There is more than one God,” Tim Tebow said in awe after watching Peyton Manning complete yet another pass in practice. “There’s just no other explanation.” The Broncos’ ex-quarterback, known less for his passing skills than for…

WTF?! Click now to find out more! Manning Joins Broncos, Tebow Converts to Paganism