Tag Archive | "satire"

Book Excerpt – Chicken Butt; The Story of a Man (1 of 4)

This is an excerpt from N. A. Kay’s newly published illustrated novel Chicken Butt; The Story of a Man, illustrated by Daniel Meisels.


Through the Chicken Brain

He was not a man, rather a chicken – the biggest chicken the world has ever spawned. Chicken Butt weighed one hundred and forty pounds and stood at six feet, making him the largest chicken that ever lived. He stood on gargantuan chicken legs which devolved into his chicken buttocks – the largest chicken-butt in recorded history – hence the name his parents gave him. The rest of his body seemed like that of a normal human, and, because of the fact, Chicken Butt was able to roam the streets as a regular man. Read the full story


Posted in Books, Newspapers & MiscComments (0)

Satirist Finds Fame by Hiding Numerical Code in Works

A satirist has amassed a large following after John Halpern from Okracoke Island, NC won over $1.3 million in the state lottery by cracking the numerical code hidden in an article written by Dominic Benjamin entitled “Octomoms Claim Numbers Don’t Lie.” Within the article were words that did not quite fit within the context of the story, and when Halpern, noticing this, assigned random numbers to the words, he came up with six numbers that he decided to play in the lottery. Read the full story


Posted in News In Your BriefsComments (0)

You Can Win $100 by Writing Killer Satire

glossy-news-roxorzThis contest is active for the month of January and February (extended for March as well), and it will be held-over every month thereafter as long as readership continues to build and the user response is positive. Read the full story


Posted in Entertainment, The RestComments (5)

Hey Rush! I’ve Got Some Satire I Wanna Sell You

What do you do when you’ve been outed on national radio trying once again to dish dirty lies about the President? If you’re Rush Limbaugh, you make up some half-assed excuse why you’re not a complete dumb ass for falling for yet another hoax. Seems Rush picked up on a story reporting that back in college, Obama wrote a thesis paper entitled “Aristocracy Reborn” that basically dissed the Constitution. NY Daily News has the whole story. Read the full story


Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, TelevisionComments (12)

FOX News Agrees to Add Satire Disclaimer

In a stunning turnaround, the allegedly “Fair & Balanced” cable news channel run by Rupert Murdoch may soon willingly add a satire disclaimer to their site, stating that all news is fabricated and meant only for humorous effect. The programming and editorial slant is not expected to change as a result, but it is hoped the satire disclaimer will deflect legal issues raised by the constant lies, hate speech and abusive hyperbole. Read the full story


Posted in Books, Newspapers & MiscComments (2)

Satirist Struggles to Find New Olsen Twins Story

Springfield— Brian K. White, noted contemporary humorist and satirist has been struggling for weeks to find a new angle from which to mock Mary Kate and/or Ashley Olsen. “I’ve been read by millions,” explains White, “but I’ve been drawing a blank on those disappointing little trollops. I don’t think I’ve lost my edge, I just fear it’s all been done.” Read the full story


Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Internets TubesComments (0)

New Glossy News Author Tutorial

New Writer Tutorial and Self-Publishing Guidelines…

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How to Get the Best Graphics on Your Story

You may have noticed that some stories on Glossy News have custom Photoshopped images, while others have stock photos, or something quite generic. Sometimes a killer image can make a story, so let’s get you one.

Ways to get a great image on your story…

1 – The very easiest way is by going out onto the web and finding the perfect image and adding it to your story at the bottom where it reads “Gazette Custom Settings” and click “browse”. Try to keep it 300×300 up to 600×600, and wider is fine too. There may be some copyright issues that come up, but if you’re concerned, just email me and I’ll share what I know about this.

It’s perfectly okay to upload a photo you don’t own the rights to if you expect us to use it as a guide, or to replace it later.

2 – The second easiest way is by making it yourself. If you have any command of Photoshop (madly expensive), Photoshop Elements (doable, price wise), Gimp (free!) or a similar program, maybe you want to make the image yourself.

Make it clever, make it funny, make it at least 300×300 pixels (max of about 600×600, though wider also works,) and add it to your story. If it’s much bigger, it won’t display properly, and if it’s taller than wide, it’s not going to look right.

If you can add the GlossyNews.com logo, that’s ideal, but not required. We have about 20,000 images per month taken off our server, and each one could be a moment of promotion if it has the logo.

3 – Request an image. At the top of your story, write what you’re looking for in ALL CAPS and one of the editors or I will try to make it work. Sometimes we don’t have time and put in a stock image, and other times we might choose a totally different image or theme. If you can make them yourself, that’s the best way.

4 – Put no image at all, and no instructions. Honestly, this works too, but it may cause delays in publishing your story, since someone will have to dedicate time and energy to polish it up.

To Authors on a Self-Publishing Schedule: — If you’d like us to whip up an image, just put your story in Pending or Drafts and we’ll see it and give it the due attention. It’s not always possible with the time constraints of a breaking story, but usually it works.


Posted in Internets TubesComments (0)

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