Katy Perry Admits “I Kissed a Girl” About Fiance Russell Brand
LOS ANGELES, California — Singer Katy Perry and British comedian Russell Brand have been on the fast track to marriage since last fall, according to reports. On December 31, their engagement became official. Because neither Perry nor Brand has unique…
“King” Rupert Murdoch — Australia’s Revenge On America
An incredible subversive plot has been uncovered in America that could erode the very foundations of our democracy. Angered over the U.S.’s alleged covert interference with their politics in the ousting of Prime Minister Gough Whitlam in 1975, Australia has…
Obama Assistant Caught E-mailing Palin as 2012 Secret Adviser
Washington, D.C. – Susie (Suze) Ruze, an aide to President Obama, was reportedly relieved of her clerical duties early Monday morning and her White House e-mail account was suspended. These actions were taken after White House officials had learned that…
Class Action Suit Says Hef Screwed Playboy
LOS ANGELES / Chicken Ranch, NV — Hugh Hefner, long living the good life on the Playboy dime, has been sued for refusing to give it up for the sake of his failing company. The stockholder class action suit is…
Lohan Donates Private Stash to Doctors Without Borders, Doubles Merck’s Contribution
HOLLYWOOD, CA — Haiti is the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. It has suffered from a history of political violence that reaches back to the 1950s when “Papa Doc” and “Baby Doc” Duvalier purged the military, installed rural militias…
Apple Creates Demand for Products That Don’t Exist — Again
Cupertino, CA Apple Inc. CEO and co-founder Steve Jobs was at it, again, doing what he does best — when not shouting at helpless employees at HQ, or in and out of hospital. He was preaching the gospel of it’s…
Job-Saving Tips For Looking Important At Work
Hello again. Since good jobs are hard to find and higher ups are often looking for staff to trim, today I am going to share with you some of my favorite tips for looking important in the workplace. We all…
OpenCarry Movement Gets Makeover on Project Runway
Taking their cue from the recent headlines that a group of gun rights activists calling itself the “OpenCarry Movement” are flexing their God-given Constitutional right to enter public places with their firearms proudly displayed, the producers of the reality series,…
Congress Proposes Replacing 2010 Election w/ “Psychic Estimate” Index
hWashington, DC (GlossyNews): House Speaker, Nancy Pelosi, met with the press and Congressional leaders today to discuss replacing the 2010 mid-term election cycle with a “psychic estimate” of the voters’ true intent. “There are just so many distractions and inherent…
Tila Tequila Shuts Down Her Twitter Account
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Reality television star Tila Tequila has canceled her Twitter account after telling her 309,980 followers that “Twitter is full of nothing but the most hateful devil worshippers, terrorists, racists, greeks, and fat people that I have ever…