Romney Goes Economy, Obama Fires Gun in Final Election Pitch
GlossyNews.com – YOUNGSTOWN, OH and NASHUA, NH – Both United States Presidential Candidates made one last pitch to the American people before Election Day though in pretty shocking and pretty shockingly different ways. Winding down a vicious election cycle, Former…
Romney/Ryan Official Victory Anthem Leaked: It’s Crickets
GlossyNews.com – I recently had the opportunity to sit down with the Head of the International Cricket Council, Sir Edward Crowley, to speak about why the ICC had chosen Governor Mitt Romney as its new official mascot, and why he…
Election Day 2012, Wall-to-Wall Coverage… Seriously
GlossyNews.com – Welcome to GlossyNews’ election day coverage. We’re running about three stories per hour, though more during the peak of the evening, so keep it here and we’ll feed you, baby bird. ALL ELECTION DAY 2012 HEADLINES You want…
Hurricane Victims Find Coping With a Treeless Landscape Difficult
Newark, NJ – (SatireWorld.com) A once thriving grove of maple trees is all but destroyed after hybrid-hurricane Sandy left the Garden State in shambles with winds topping 100 MPH and an unprecented storm that devoured buildings and boardwalk. Now, unseen…
Mysterious Robo Calls Hound Voters Days Before Election
Mysterious robo-calls have been plaguing American households in massive amounts these last few days of the build up to the Presidential election. Upon answering a heavily accented voice will announce “Love America or cleave it! Vote Hu Jintao for Plesident…
Netanyahu Declares Candidacy for U.S. President
GlossyNews.com – Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu today called a press conference to announce that he would accept the position of U.S. President, which he hoped would end the acrimony and divisiveness of the Romney-Obama rivalry for the office. Following…
Intense Negativity From Election Drama Create Huge Psychic Whirlwind In Atlantic
The generated heat created by battle between the two rivaling political parties vying for the U.S. Presidency has unleashed unforeseen consequences. The constant turbulence from partisan hatred, scandalous accusations, frictional debate and just plain pissedness has caused a massive psychic…
Alaska, All The Reasons Convicts Want To Live Here
Alaska is the land of pristine beauty, untouched by humankind, except for those dirty Russians, Sarah Palin, Exxon-Mobil, and the random arctic hillbilly hiding out from the federal government. But there are plenty of reasons to live here, and rather…
Protester Ousted for Using Capitalism-Made Product
A woman was removed from protest group Occupy after fellow member found out that she used commercial sanitary products. Mary Chambers was dishonorably dismissed from the group following an incident were her bag fell open and the contents fell to…
Taylor Hicks Shocked to Hear Taylor Hicks on the Radio
Erstwhile American Idol victor Taylor Hicks was shopping Thursday in a Ralph’s, a supermarket owned by the Kroger company, when he heard something come over the PA that shocked him; a Taylor Hicks song. “I heard it and I was…