Category: Top Stories
Angry Liberals Vow to Open New Chain of Stores Called ‘Snobby Lobby’
Boston – Liberals are seething over the Supreme Court decision which allows Hobby Lobby to not have to offer certain birth control products which they believe induce abortions and which violate their religious beliefs. Hateful people took to twitter after…
Hog Farmers Proudly Sell Parts Right to the Bitter, Musky Ends
Social media has blown up with images of an actual box of American made pork product, the “Boneless Pork Rectum, Inverted”. We take you inside this unusual treat. Boneless means without bone. Pork is the industry term for pig products….
Travelocity; Genius, Evil or Evil Genius? (We’ll find out Monday)
When I went to book my upcoming trip I found the best deal at Travelocity.com, but at what price? The answer may surprise you. It sure as hell surprised me, and perhaps not in the good way. I booked a…
Feds Open No-Kill Shelter for Immigrants on Texas/Mexico Border
Laredo, TX – The federal government has opened a new no-kill shelter in this border town to help find homes for thousands of new illegal immigrants who continue flooding into the country. In the past, if an illegal alien sneaked…
Brazilian Boy Steals Joke from Friend; Gets Publicly Hanged
A young Brazilian boy, accused of stealing a simple joke from his classmate and friend, was found hanged in front of his home, a pile of human shit piled against one another. The young boy’s mother was left crying her…
IRS Commissioner Gollum Gets Grilled by Congress About His Precious Agency
Washington D.C. – This week has not been kind to Gollum and his “precious” agency, the Internal Revenge Service, as the creature has been on the hot seat having to answer for the mysterious disappearance of Lois Lerner’s relevant emails.
New California Law Requires College Student to Have Written Consent Before Sex
A new California law requires that before engaging in any type of sexual encounter, college students must first sign a legal document to authorize the act or acts to take place and must be witnessed by at least one uninvolved…
After Dismal Sales, Publisher Recommends Other Uses For Hillary Clinton Book
New York City – Publishing giant Simon & Schuster, desperate to find a way to turn a profit on Hillary Clinton’s new book “Hard Choices”, has come out with other possible uses for the book. The company hopes to entice…
Bill Kristol, Always Wrong, Moved to “More Appropriate” Weather Man Role
Outspoken pro-war pundit Bill Kristol is making headlines again for his unwavering support for military action in Iraq and the world at large. Facing pushback, The Weakly Standard has moved him to a more fitting role: Weather Man. “Look,” said…
The ‘Avengers’ Called Upon to Battle Militant Extremists in Iraq
United Nations – The United Nations has formally asked the ‘Avengers’ to step in and quell the current wave of violence in Iraq that is being waged by the extremist terror group known as ISIS. As the terrorist savages closed…