Archive | December, 2016

You Say ‘Fuck 2016,’ 2016 Says ‘Fuck The Haters!’

You Say ‘Fuck 2016,’ 2016 Says ‘Fuck The Haters!’

Does anyone else think the whole ‘Fuck you, 2016?’ thing has a bit of a class bias?

I don’t think 2016 is objectively worse than other recent years. Continue Reading

Posted in Human Interest0 Comments

AOL Satire: Ebay User Gets $9,214 for AOL 1.0 Startup Disc

AOL Satire: Ebay User Gets $9,214 for AOL 1.0 Startup Disc

With the passing of time, both the dawn and the golden age of the internet are both long since things of the past. Much like the expiration of early automobiles, collectors have found outrageous value in clinging to the past, and AOL startup discs are no exception. This week, Todd Farmer of West Chester, PA, sold his mint-condition AOL 1.0 startup disc for over $9,000 in an online auction.

Todd Farmer knew he was sitting on gold, but he’d been sitting on it a good long time. Continue Reading

Posted in Internets Tubes, Top Stories0 Comments

AOL Satire: Time-Warner Acquires Tony Hawk

AOL Satire: Time-Warner Acquires Tony Hawk

In a hostile bid that’s been underway for several months, Time-Warner has successfully completed a hostile bid to purchase skateboard star Tony Hawk for $216Million in cash and an undisclosed amount of stock.

The acquisition includes Tony Hawk merchandising rights, all of Tony Hawk’s property including vehicles and real estate, and Tony Hawk’s personal soul. Bidding for Tony Hawk’s soul reached nearly $600,000 on Ebay last year before site administrators cancelled the auction due to violations of terms of use. Continue Reading

Posted in Top Stories0 Comments

AOL Satire: Will AOL Buy My Blog for Millions?

AOL Satire: Will AOL Buy My Blog for Millions?

You may have heard about how AOL once purchased the Huffington Post for the sum of $315 million dollars.

Will AOL buy your blog?

Will AOL pay you a million dollars for your blog or website?

Will AOL give you hundreds of millions of dollars to buy your blog?

Are you crazy?

The short answer is maybe, but the longer answer is maybe-but-a-we-just-a-gotta-wait-and-see, but maybe not for $315 million cold, hard smackeroos. It could be more, though it could be much, much less, and you’d still be happy about it. Continue Reading

Posted in Biz News, Internets Tubes0 Comments

More AOL Satire Mayhem!

More AOL Satire Mayhem!

NOTE FROM WALLACE: Continue Reading

Posted in Internets Tubes0 Comments

President Trump Confined to White House, Refusing to take Revolving Door

President Trump Confined to White House, Refusing to take Revolving Door

Dateline: WASHINGTON, D.C.–After much legal wrangling, President-elect Donald Trump and his children, Ivanka, Eric and Donald Jr. divested themselves of their holdings in the Trump Organization and in Trump’s dozens of other companies so that they could carry out their duties as president and as top advisors without the taint of blatant conflicts of interest. But after their term in office, they found it impossible to physically leave the White House, because they refused to use any of the hundreds of revolving doors back to the private sector, these being the only doors leading out of the building. Continue Reading

Posted in Politics0 Comments

Jonathan Mitchell: Reflections Before the Election

Jonathan Mitchell: Reflections Before the Election

NOTE FROM WALLACE: This note was penned by Jonathan Mitchell, prominent autism advocate, before the recent US election result. I think this piece is of good historical interest, as it captures some of the uncertainty and anxiety in the air at that time.

***

The election is today and I’ve already cast my vote. I wanted to make a blog post before it ends tomorrow.

Donald Trump believes that autism is caused by vaccines. I think he may also believe in a government conspiracy. He also mocked a disabled reporter which means he mocked me and all other disabled people. Continue Reading

Posted in Health, Politics0 Comments

Some of Our Contributors have Youtube Channels!

Some of Our Contributors have Youtube Channels!

Note from Wallace:

These are just some of the Youtube channels of our contributors! Please feel free to comment below if you have more suggestions for funny of thought-provoking channels! We can make another article later on…

Continue Reading

Posted in Entertainment, Internets Tubes, Top Stories0 Comments

Lots to Learn About Video Poker Slot Machines

Lots to Learn About Video Poker Slot Machines

If уоu аrе playing video poker slot machines оr lооkіng tо play them, thеn соnѕіdеr Jokers Wild – іtѕ thе perfect introduction fоr novice players. Video poker slot machines, unlіkе standard slot machines аllоw уоu tо gеt аn edge оvеr thе casino bу playing correctly, уоu саn thеrеfоrе increase уоur chances оf winning іf уоu play correctly. If аll thе video poker slot machine games Jokers Wild іѕ arguably оnе оf thе mоѕt fun. Bеlоw wе wіll lооk аt thе rules аnd hоw уоu саn win.

An easy аnd fun introduction: Continue Reading

Posted in Entertainment0 Comments

American Hypocrisy Fuels Interdimensional Starship

American Hypocrisy Fuels Interdimensional Starship

Dateline: WATERLOO–A team of scientists and engineers at the Perimeter Institute in Waterloo, Ontario has invented a technique for converting American leaders’ hypocrisy into fuel to power an interdimensional starship.

Thorsten Dillydally, leader of the team of researchers, was led to his hypothesis after sitting through press coverage of the Russian hacking of the Democratic National Committee’s emails, which tilted the election towards a Trump victory of the presidency in 2016. Continue Reading

Posted in Politics0 Comments

Christmas Carol Parody (Once in Royal David’s Tavern)

Christmas Carol Parody (Once in Royal David’s Tavern)

Once in Royal David’s Tavern

Sat a lonely family

Mary, Joseph, and her baby

All alone, on Christmas Day!

 

Joseph sighed and said to Mary

It’s so dull, why don’t we have a beer?

Mary scowled and wagged her finger

There will be no drunkards here! Continue Reading

Posted in Music0 Comments

Glossy News Classics IV. Rfreed: A Return to ‘T’was the Night Before Christmas’

Glossy News Classics IV. Rfreed: A Return to ‘T’was the Night Before Christmas’

NOTE FROM WALLACE:

One of our very best writers puts a new spin on an old classic!

Excellent work, rfreed!

***

A RETURN TO TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

Twas the night before Christmas
and all through the house
not a creature was stirring
we were all totally soused. Continue Reading

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Entertainment5 Comments

The Acceptable Antisemitism of the Anti-Racist Community (ARCom)

The Acceptable Antisemitism of the Anti-Racist Community (ARCom)

NOTE: An earlier version of this was drafted a few months ago, and never published.

Still, it’s all worth thinking about anyway. The topic of acceptable antisemitism, a key form of acceptable racism, remains pertinent.

***

Just look at the following link. I think the headline may be inappropriate and probably risks tapping into Alt-Right sentiment. Perhaps focusing on anti-semitism might been better? Still, it is well known journalists often do not choose the headline anyway. Continue Reading

Posted in Human Interest, Serious Commentary0 Comments

Galen Erso will Design Note8

Galen Erso will Design Note8

Seoul, South Korea: Samsung announced that they have a new Head of Engineering overseeing the design of the Galaxy Note8.

Galen Erso, the only engineer from the Note7 project deemed competent enough to avoid termination will be taking the helm of the so-called “Next Great Thing.” Continue Reading

Posted in Gadgets & Gizmos0 Comments

Free Satire Ebook Deal for Xmas

Free Satire Ebook Deal for Xmas

Both volumes of the Gang of Sneer series are free from 22 to 26 November!

Tarquin Binnett’s Sound Englishman’s Common Sense Jamboree

Continue Reading

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Entertainment0 Comments

Last Minute Xmas Gifts! Glossy News Authors with Ebooks to Sell! (2/2)

Last Minute Xmas Gifts! Glossy News Authors with Ebooks to Sell! (2/2)

Tim Jones

(Funny Guide to Parenting!)

Continue Reading

Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc, Entertainment0 Comments

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