Category: Politics
NPR to Use FOX Tactics to Survive In Modern US Media Climate
The recent Juan Williams firing scandal has led National Public Radio to realize that they need to develop more FOX News type media tactics if they are to survive. A radical top to bottom make-over has been ordered for the…
‘The Dick’ Cheney Gets Starring Role In ‘Dr. Strangelove’ Remake
Dick Cheney returns to the worlds spotlight this week as he appears in his first movie part–reprising the unforgettable Peter Sellers role of Dr. Strangelove in the remake of the Stanley Kubrik movie of the same name. Sellers made cinematic…
White House Celebrates as US Reaches 100% Unemployment Milestone
Washington, DC – 52 year old Robert Freed was blind-sided today when he walked into work and found a pink slip taped to his locker. After 23 years as an assemblyman at the GM truck plant in Dearborn Michigan, he…
Sarah Palin Takes Aim at Babs Bush, Fires the Crazy Cannon
It is increasingly clear that establishment Republicans don’t have much love for Ms. Sarah Palin. It is also crystal clear that Sarah Palin couldn’t give two rat’s asses if they do or not. In fact, she is going out of…
Forget Green, “Blue” Group Mounts Tea Party Challenge
CINCINNATI, Ohio (Glossy News) — Flush with recent success, the loosely organized AstroTurf Tea Party movement already faces a threat to its new-found power from an unexpected source. While some political analysts call the group a predictable splintering, others term…
Haley Barbour Channels Aunt Pittypat to Deny Racism’s Afoot
A secret videotape was recently found of Gov Haley Barbour (R-Miss.) channeling the spirit of Aunt Pittypat from the movie, Gone with the Wind, to let the world know the hubbub over Virginia Gov. Bob McDonnell’s omission of slavery, while…
TSA Screener Detects Testicular Cancer in Traveler, Saves Life.
SAN NARCISO, Calif. — Ceremonies will be held today in honor of William Fallopian, a local San Narciso boy turned hero. Fallopian, son of Mike Fallopian, a well known Yoyodyne executive and chairman of the Peter Pinguid Society, works for…
Future Beck Rallies Banned from Lincoln Memorial… by Lincoln
WASHINGTON DC (GlossyNews) — Glenn Beck returned quietly late at night months after his famous speech at the Lincoln Memorial to gloat over his success. “I really had ’em in the palm of my hand!” he snickered to himself. The…
Barack Obama Admits Hunting Bigfoot, “Grazing” Him
CHICAGO, Ill. (Glossy News) — Career urbanite and now President, Barack Obama, spoke before a group of hunters and outdoors-men in Boise, Idaho, in an attempt to solidify support from the over 225 million Americans who own firearms and of…
TSA Groping Incident Attracts New Employees to Agency
LOS ANGELES, Calif. (Glossy News) — Since the recent incident between Southern California resident John Tyner and the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), which involved the now infamous “groping” scandal, travelers are debating whether to continue moving about the Land of…