Category: Top Stories
Millennial Children Demand Parents Pay for Relocation As Tensions In the Gulf Grow
Salem, OR- As tensions between the United States and Iran continue to flare after the latest attack on an American drone, more and more millennial children are demanding that Mom and Dad pay to send them away before war is…
Mnuchin Passes on Tubman, Offers Trump as Compromise for New $20
Washington, DC- On Thursday, Secretary of the Treasury, Steven Mnuchin, announced he had scrapped plans to release an updated $20 bill featuring the likeness of famed American abolitionist Harriet Tubman, sighting security issues with the design. The new bill had…
WTF?! Trump Fox & “Fiends” Interview Goes Off the Rails on a Crazy Train!
Washington, DC- On Friday, during a wild interview with Fox and Fiends host Ainsley Earhardt, President Donald Trump openly challenged House Speaker Nancy Pelosi to begin Articles of Impeachment, repeatedly challenged the House Speaker’s “manhood,” discussed the Art of the…
FRIENDZONED! Loser Gove Homeless After Anti-Elitist ‘Business Experts’ Rant!
Unlawful north of the M1 Michael Howard hiss-a-like and non-porcine-coke-snorting metrosexual career shitstirrer Michael Gove has just had his hopes of a stellar career at the very pinnacle of the UK political class cruelly dashed, after yet another ill-advised rant…
T-Rex & Me: & a Naughty Missile Conspiracy in Iran!
NOTE FROM WALLACE: Glossy News (pop us a like here!) has been buzzing over the whole controversial missile attack that widely loathed ‘old school conservatives’ (neocon warmongers) Mike “Manky Mike” Pompeo and John “Armchair Johnny” Bolton are conveniently attributing to…
Dark Nigel Rises: A One Act Play About the Bane of Brexit!
FARAGE: Behind you stands a symbol of oppression. The House of Commons, where millions of citizens have languished under the name of this woman: Theresa May: who has been held up to you as the shining example of patriotism! You…
John Bolton Infallibly PROVES Iranian Tanker Conspiracy Theory!
Foamy-mouthed neoconservative intellectual and MIC-beloved establishment conspiracy theory John Bolton has come out fighting against allegations that the Iran ‘smoking gun’ is just another Blair-stylee WMD fraud!
Why Is Everyone Talking About Forex Trading?
Forex trading is by no means a recent phenomenon. Long before digital nomads and virtual freelancing were mainstream concepts for making a living, forex trading gently bubbled away as a viable way to break out of the nine to five…
With The New Iranian Snafu Now Would Be A Good Time To ‘Remember The Maine.’ And A Few Other Things!
Well, it looks like we are going to get ourselves into another Mid East snafu. Bolton wants to go manu-a-manu with Iran (as long as someone else does the actual fighting. He is in competition with Trump for the most…
Bieber and Cruise to meet in the UFC?
Yep, you did read that right; Justin Bieber wants to fight Tom Cruise in the UFC. In what has to go down as one of the more surprising headlines to have come out of the first half of 2019, Canadian…