State of Indiana to Introduce Bus
INDIANAPOLIS – Following months of tireless debate, officials in Indiana have announced plans to introduce a workable and comprehensive bus. Enduring decades without a recognizable public transportation system, many in the Hoosier State – particularly those living outside of Indianapolis…
A brief history of the apology
Apologizing is as old as mankind. The very first recorded apology took place in the Garden of Eden, when Eve apologized to Adam for goading him into taking a bite out of the apple. An ancient Greek translation of her…
How Much Really Is That Doggy in the Window? (comic)
We’ve all heard the jingle, but really how much indeed is that doggy in the window? This age-old question deserves an answer, even if the asker is clearly suffering from some sort of chemical or mental impairment. Seriously, how much…
Plumbers Rush to Stop NSA Leak
FORT MEADE – After gaining word of a tremendous NSA leak, plumbers in Staten Island and across the country dashed to Maryland in hopes of averting an insurance claim disaster. Led by Joe Wurzelbacher and John McCain, the group of…
New, Unpublished Song Tribute to John Wayne By Johnny Cash Discovered – ‘A Boy Named Marion’
Johnny Cash historians have discovered a previously unknown Cash ballad amongst his files that might be his next posthumous hit. It appears to be a rewrite of his big ’60’s hit “A Boy Named Sue” that is a tribute to…
Toddler Tells Parent to “Shut Up” (comic)
If you ever have the misfortune of sprouting offspring, you’ll know what I mean when I say they can get pretty lippy, and mighty quickly at that. Pretty much as soon as they learn to talk, they know how to…
Michele Bachman Comes Out as Eggplant
ST. PAUL – Democrats and Republicans alike are in shock after famed Congresswoman Michele Bachmann announced her exit from the closet as a proud American Eggplant. The move, which came after her recent decision not to seek reelection to the…
Chick-a-Day Offers “Renewable” Baby Pets
Want to get your daughter an adorable baby chick or bunny, but worry about what will happen when it’s no longer cute? This Connecticut company has the answer; just get a new one every week. Emma Stearner turned eight on…
Don’t Let Jesus’ Death Be for Nothing (comic)
We learn from a very young age that Jesus died for our sins, so we can commit them without having to sacrifice animals to our Lord God to earn repentance. Still leaves a few questions, but my question is better….
General Mills to Introduce Biracial Cheerios
GOLDEN VALLEY – General Mills is attracting wide attention after announcing it will introduce a new, interracial line of Cheerios. The decision comes in the wake of controversy generated by a cute ad of the company’s, which showcases an interracial…