Category: Sports
North Korean Soccer Punishment ‘Excessive’
After being knocked out of the World Cup, North Korea took unique approach to improve their teams performance, which has been criticized as a punishment and branded ‘excessive’, spec “ifically by “sports pussies.” When our source in North Korea asked…
Pittsburgh Pirates On Record Pace to Reach 53-Win Limit
PITTSBURGH — The Pittsburgh Pirates are out to their best start yet, already having secured 51 of their 53 maximum allowable wins at just the halfway point of the MLB season. To put it into perspective with regard to the…
DOJ Investigates DOJ, DOJ Clears DOJ in DOJ Review
After information has come to light regarding Chief Justice Eric Holder’s seizure of months of AP phone records and targeting of journalists such as James Rosen and David Sanger, Mr. Holder must now answer…to himself. Upon reading about the entire…
Extreme Sportsman Completes Successful Base-jump, Funeral to be Held Friday
LODI, CALIF – While base-jumping last week in a northern California ravine, Extreme Sportsman Felix Grainger’s parachute reportedly malfunctioned, sending the 28-year-old’s body crashing to the earth at an incredible rate of speed, whereupon he arrived at a gruesome, untimely…
Why was the boxer so funny? (comic)
Kids love to tell jokes in only two varieties; dumb and inappropriate. The one sadly falls into the “dumb” category, but hopefully redeems itself in the fourth act. This is a fine example of why we shouldn’t leave jokes to…
Breaking: Washington Will Ditch Offensive Redskin Mascot for 2013-14 NFL Season
Landover, Maryland: In a decision reached last week by franchise owner Dan Snyder, The Washington Redskins will kick off the 2013-2014 season with a new name and mascot. The official date for the name change is July 25, the same…
Miami Heat Win Streak Ends–PBS Renews Telethon to Raise Awareness for Regular Season
Without realizing it, for the past month or so, the world was interested in the NBA’s regular season games. And all of the credit goes to one team: The Miami Heat. In case you just came out of a coma,…
Google Search For ‘Oscar Pistorius Murder Trial’ Evolves Into ‘Reeva Steenkamp Topless’
INDIANAPOLIS – During a routine navigation of the internet Friday, a local man’s Google search for the keywords “Oscar Pistorius murder trial” evolved over the course of 7 minutes into “Reeva Steenkamp Topless.” Initially looking to gain up-to-the-minute news on…
College Basketball Players Still Waiting on Endorsement Deals
College Basketball is great, no two ways about it. It has as much competitive spirit as any sport, athletes who will be in the big time in no time, and everything else you’d want… except compensation. John Calipari, coach at…
American Team Favored to Win 2013 World Series
ST. LOUIS – The St. Louis Cardinals made history Friday when they became the 104th American team to win the World Series. With their 6-2 victory over the Texas Rangers in game 7, The Cardinals extended the United States’ formidable…