Category: Entertainment
‘The Onion’ Publishes an Issue of True Stories
Foxpeter Grove, MD (GlossyNews) — The Onion, America’s premier satire and humor newspaper, shocked the literary world today by publishing an issue of ABSOLUTELY TRUE STORIES! The US’s flagship smart-ass site today reported on several newsworthy incidents that actually happened….
Palin Just a Typical Red Blooded (Necked?) Girl
Late one night last week, while she was in her compartment on the Lear60 from Fox leaving New York, Sarah and Todd were working on her autobiography. As they began to brainstorm, with the help of a ‘relaxation substance’ Sarah…
FlashForward Cancelled, and Five Reasons Why That’s Good
The high-budget ABC sci-fi less-than-thriller known as Flashforward has been canceled, and by a few accounts, it’s a tragedy. By many more accounts, however it’s a good thing, and here are just five of the biggest reasons why that’s actually…
Here’s How American Idol Can Save (or ruin) the 2011 Season
American Idol easily established itself as a ratings powerhouse in its first season, but now that Paula has left the show, and Simon has likewise finished his last show (though for very different reasons,) the viability of the franchise is…
Paul McCartney Ruled Dead
The Hague, Netherlands (GlossynEUs) — The EU Commission for Historicity today rendered a long awaited verdict on the status of Sir Paul McCartney. The EUCMA investigation was prompted after renewed controversy spawned by audio tapes purportedly from the late George…
Glossy News Names New South America Bureau Chief(s)
South America (GlossyNews) — Industry insiders are saying reclusive, mysterious media titan Brian K. White has struck again, in his seemingly relentless march to replace Rupert Murdoch as the planet’s leading purveyor of nonsense. In the wake of famed journalist…
Bono Undergoes Emergency Back Surgery for ‘Atlas Syndrome’
MUNICH, Germany (GlossyNews) — U2 front man Bono underwent emergency back surgery on May 21, 2010, while preparing for the American leg of the band’s “360 Degree” international tour. U2, having sold an estimated 150 million records, is arguably the…
Palin’s Pillow Talk with a Patriot
Wilmington, De Patriot Time Travel — 1782 – On a recent time travel expedition to the late 1700’s, Sarah Palin found herself in bed with Jacob Broom, another B-level politician some consider a Founding Father and a man “who knows…
The Baby Dictionary .com Shows What Kids Really Say
Satire is a notable medium, and it’s thus called because it’s neither rare nor well done, and well, we see a lot of new entries into the game each week, but few so clever as TheBabyDictionary.com. They do things a…
Deepak Chopra Finally Admits: We’re Screwed
State of Denial – Mind-Body Medicine guru Deepak Chopra, author of such books as “The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success” and “The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire,” has done a complete about face and is now giving lectures based on his…