Category: Books, Newspapers & Misc
Top Glossy News February Stories Announced… Doozies Included
Well, it’s been a crazy month, and traffic has been higher than it has in at least a year, so here are the winners… and yes, there are some surprises in the mix. The first surprise is that reigning champ,…
The Power of Intention by Dr. Wayne Dyer; a Review of Sorts
Ok, so I’m taking my husband to work. On the radio is some guy telling me how I can improve my life through my thoughts. How I can make my intentions come true if I only change my thinking from…
January 2014 GlossyNews Winners Announced
January GlossyNews Winners Announced We have the best satire staff in the game and it’s with glee I announce the winners of our January contest. There was a delay in the announcement caused by, you know, let’s say “factors.” A…
Sober Russians Pose Security Threat At Sochi
Each week the Russian military, secret police and Sochi security authorities receive dozens of homemade videos made by ethnic Russians threatening terrorist attacks on innocent civilians at the Sochi Olympics. Almost all are dismissed as the drunken rankings of misfits,…
ill-Reputed, Reputedly ill Onion Writer Reported Dead
A highly respected writer for The Onion was found dead in near Fargo, North Dakota Thursday. The cause of death is still being investigated. The body of Kilroy Kovacs III, who went by the pseudonym “Kilroy”, was found in an…
The Best GlossyNews Stories of December, 2013
We put out $275 in cash prizes for top authors last month, and while nobody beat the top archive stories, we still handed out an additional three cash prizes. We set out three prizes. One for the top-read article, one…
Fashion Industry Schemes to Punish Men by Turning Women into Freaks
Dateline: LOS ANGELES — More and more consumers are aware that magazines hire Photoshop artists to doctor pictures of celebrities, as part of an elaborate ritual designed to appease the celebrities’ agents and to flatter the egocentric actresses so they’ll…
Elle Magazine’s February Cover to Feature X-Ray of Mindy Kaling’s Skeleton
NEW YORK — Elle Magazine recently unveiled its February cover, which features an X-ray photograph of Mindy Kaling’s skeleton. According to professional photography critic Gilroy Franscesco, “This cover is so magnificent and tastefully done that words simply cannot describe. That’s…
Colorblind Woman Cries After Reading The Onion
Napsanotices, Illinois – Following the advice of her trustworthy coworker on Tuesday, 27 year old, Jane DeWitt of the suburbs just outside of Chicago decided to purchase the ingredients for a roast brisket in order to comply with her coworker’s…
Sarah Palin Coloring Book Is Amazon’s New Top Seller
The former part-time Republican Governor of Alaska has a new coloring book called “Sarah Palin in Comparison” that broke a sales record for its publisher and now tops Amazon’s best seller list. Earlier this month, Little Red Schoolhouse Publishing also…