Posted in Biz News Politics

The News (Really) Bytes – June 2015

Jeb Bush announces candidacy for President – The head political office of the U.S. is now going back to the Bush Leagues. Rachel Dolezal, a white person, pretended to be black and became head of the Spokane Washington NAACP and…

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Posted in Politics

Fox News Forge Anti-Labour Party Screed (1/2)

Fox News has recently directed an audacious and highly compassionate act of humanitarian interventionism towards the UK. Yes; they have tried to (further?) discredit the Labour Party by concocting a document by Harold Wilson that appears to demonize his own…

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Posted in Entertainment Television

Australia’s Latest Doggygate Scandal: A Land Without Biebers (2/2)

Welcome back, cobber! Remember last time? Strewth, mate! Yurl need to ‘ave ten tons ah Frosty Jacks when you ‘ear what ‘appens next! *** The moment Fatima and Bieber landed in Alessi Exile Airport in Bishop’s Kennedy, Queensland… A lawless…

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Posted in Entertainment Television

Australia’s Latest Doggygate Scandal: A Land Without Biebers (1/2)

A few days ago, Johnny Depp finally threw his cutlass out of the pram about being threatened last month by the unaccountable Canberra/E-Street/Ramsay Street/Ramsbottom Street/Summer Bay/Richmond Hill regime: http://www.nbcnews.com/pop-culture/celebrity/johnny-depp-amber-heard-avoid-australia-after-dog-threat-n379546 Unanticipated, obscurely tedious Australian soap opera references? Well, you can’t say…

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Posted in Serious Commentary War Zone

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unimaginable Happened – Part 7 – the Iraq Factor

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unimaginable Happened – Part 7 – The Iraq Factor (A serial book excerpt) After President Bush is killed when Flight 93 strikes the White House on 9/11, Vice President Cheney ascends to the throne….

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Posted in Human Interest Serious Commentary

Racist Murders at Charleston: All in This Together? (2/2)

Last time, I acknowledged that all forms of prejudice are complex, and cannot be seen as corresponding one-to-one with each other. However, while making these qualifications, I also took the risk of drawing an analogy between racism and sexism. And…

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Posted in Human Interest Serious Commentary

Racist Murders at Charleston: All in This Together? (1/2)

One look at the US media, including the comments sections, will show you that something disturbing is happening. Something which has also been happening in many other countries for a long, long time. I speak of an abstract “humanity-centred” moralism that only…

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Posted in Entertainment Music

Weird Al Sings Love-Lorne Rhapsody

NEW YORK CITY – Weird Al Yankovic is respected worldwide for his funny and sometimes daring song parodies. The singer has been going strong for over 35 years, but it appears as if he ran into a bit of trouble…

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Posted in Internets Tubes Podcasts Video News

Glossy News Podcast Comes 7/27/15, and I Need Your Help

Some have called him “funny,” “awesome,” and “kind,” but as kind as they are, my kids won’t be able to listen to my podcast for adult language and themes. On July 27th, the Glossy News podcast will launch with five…

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Posted in Politics Religionism

Governor Haley Proposes Replacing Confederate Flag with Dukes of Hazzard Flag

Republican Governor Nikki Haley called for the removal of the Confederate flag in the capital of South Carolina Monday, after pressure from many who called the flag racist and divisive. The pressure was mounting, after a white supremacist opened fire…

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Posted in Talky Pictures

Mad Max Maxes Out His Street Cred In… Where Did You Say?!

Just saw the latest Mad Max movie. WOWZER!!! SUPER GROOVY!!! COWABUNGA!!! Mad Max just made it back to the screen after a hiatus of only 30 YEARS!!!!! Mel Gibson got the sack. Too old. Too racist. Can’t have no one…

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Posted in Opinion/Editorial Society

America is the greatest nation on earth – In your FACE, Denmark

On July 4th, we will once again celebrate our independence from the tyranny of England. Those British monarchs can be so oppressive. If it were up to Queen Elizabeth, we’d all be forced to drink Earl Grey tea with every…

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Posted in Human Interest Politics

Alex Salmond: “PC Bigots Don’t Understand this here Culture of Mine”

Widely respected political hipster and relentlessly-resentless SNP politician Alex Salmond has recently performed a valiant act of radical political performance theatre, with his “behave yourself, woman!” http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-politics/11653578/Alex-Salmond-must-urgently-apologise-for-his-unacceptable-sexism.html

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Posted in Making Headlines War Zone

U.S. Steps Up Iraq’s Military Training by Attaching American Heads to Iraqi Bodies

Dateline: ARLINGTON COUNTY—American military officials order surgical attachment of American soldiers’ heads to the bodies of Iraqi soldiers to improve Iraq’s military training. Prior efforts to train democratic Iraq’s military have been stymied. Instead of fighting Islamic State insurgents, Iraq’s…

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Posted in Making Headlines Religionism

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy

Phew! I’m worn out. Or maybe just in a vaguely soporific state. It was all fun and amusing to start with, but I think the novelty’s worn off. Gets a bit samey after a while. Still, I always like to…

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Posted in Making Headlines Religionism

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy

OK, the sky hasn’t fallen in…. Yet. Just gotta keep going, I suppose. Cosmic E-Cheek Ass Slicer OK, this one is a little bit nastier, if also somewhat more fun… And it’s only for the more experienced, intrepidly kinky fetish…

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Posted in Making Headlines Religionism

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy (1/3)

Oof! Sorry for the mildly sensationalist headline. I never quite got over not getting to be a top reporter for the Galactical Enquirer. Still, somewhat more crucially, I must inform you of the existential spiritual peril facing you and your…

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Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc Serious Commentary

9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened -Part 6

9/12/2001 THE DAYS AFTER THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED Part 6 (A serial book excerpt) In previous installments – After Flight 93 crashes into the White House on 9/11/2001 killing President Bush as was originally planned, Dick Cheney, the Vice President, is…

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Posted in Crime Strange People

An Interview With Osama bin Laden (Yes, we know that he is already dead)

… but we aren’t going to let that stop us… Glossynews has gained the unique opportunity to interview the infamous terrorist Osama bin Laden, the instigator of the 911 attacks on the U.S.. Reaching him at his present location in…

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Posted in Human Interest

The Fastidious Liberators: Open Letter From the Dead (2/2)

Last time: “A neocon is a Trotskyite who has been mugged by the prospect of a huge state salary.” To proceed further: The same is true of liberal interventionists, of course. I mean, the only real difference between neocons and…

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