Search Results for: democrats
Insurance Companies Market ‘Do-It-Yourself’ Medical Options
WASHINGTON, DC (GlossyNews) — In a move sure to restart the nation’s divisive healthcare debate, major insurance companies announced new healthcare plans featuring controversial “self-serve” medical options designed to reduce costs. “Our new self-serve options for childbirth, surgery and annual…
Senator Apologizes to Conquistadors
NUEVO LAREDO, Texas (GlossyNews) — In a move termed a ‘head scratcher’ by DC insiders, TX Senator Denton R. Fender this week released a statement aimed at rapprochement towards Spain, and some people who have been dead for five centuries….
McCartney Comment Prompts Look Inside Bush’s Library
ODESSA, Texas (GlossyNews) — Aside from a few die-hard Republicans who can’t bring themselves to believe that George W. Bush is not the sharpest tool in the shed, most people thought Paul McCartney’s joke regarding George Bush not knowing what…
Airport Screenings to Include CT Scans, MRIs, Dental Cleanings
WASHINGTON, D.C. (Glossy News) — Last December, following a foiled terrorist airline attack, airports implemented full body scans, prompting many air travelers to wonder what additional security procedures they would have to endure. The wondering can stop. Yesterday, the Department…
Obama Inspires Oil Spill to Clean Itself Up
Smelly Corners, LA (GlossyNews) — President Barack Obama’s recent visit to the Gulf Coast was billed as a chance for the Commander in Chief to assess the damage caused by the massive oil spill, but a top White House aid…
Coal Mine Canaries Plan Protest Over Working Conditions
Weirton, WVa – A group of canaries have put their tiny talons down once and for all and are claiming they have the most hazardous job in the world and should have a place in line for various government concessions….
Obama Appoints TV Show ‘Doctor’ as Vice President
Washington, DC (GlossyNews) — In a bold bid to rally voter support for healthcare reform and boost Democrats’ election prospects, President Obama announced today the resignation of Vice President Joe Biden and appointment of television actor Patrick Dempsey to replace…
Texas Governor: Oil Well Accident Act of God – Gays Still an Abomination
Austin, TX (GlossyNews) — Texas Governor Rick Perry, in a tawdry attempt to poison the jury pool when the lawsuits start flying over the BP oil spill, has announced the oil well blowout in the Gulf of Mexico is “an…
In New Book, Laura Bush Can’t Acknowledge Horrible Accident Known as W
In a perfect example of how psychotic the Bush Clan remains, Laura Bush has once again milked the tragedy of a teenager she killed in a car accident in Midland, Texas 50 years ago, the car wreck law firms phiadelphia…
Michael Moore Added to Supreme Court List to Spite Conservatives
Chicago, IL (GlossyNews) Both critics and supporters of President Obama are expressing equal measures of dismay by a recent announcement that liberal filmmaker Michael Moore is on the short list to replace Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens. Justice Stevens…