Coal Mine Canaries Plan Protest Over Working Conditions

Weirton, WVa – A group of canaries have put their tiny talons down once and for all and are claiming they have the most hazardous job in the world and should have a place in line for various government concessions.

Ith true,” says a canary known only as Precious, “The time hath come for all canarieth to thpeak in unithon on thith very important matter. For over one hundred yearths, our rapid heartbeats were thilenced and thwee were put in a mine with only carbon monoxthide to breathe, while humanth hung around outthide the mine hoping we would die so they wouldn’t have to work that day. No longer will we thtand for thuch inhumane treatment.” Precious went on to say, “Also, we are going to copyright the politically incorrect term, Canary in a Coal Mine, and bury that thucker for good.”

The noisy protestors are not going unnoticed on Capital Hill. Republicans have already denounced complaining canaries as another interest group strutting around looking for an entitlement. “The next thing you know, they’ll be wanting 40 acres and a mule,” joked a Republican Congressman. The Democrats are listening and are busy taking internal polls to find out if there are enough voting canaries to give a crap about, and will make a statement after the poll results are in. Ed. Note: You can follow the goings-on of the canary protest group by watching for new posts on guess where-Twitter…

Author: TawdrySoup.Com

I am a satire writer from the middle of nowhere. My work appears all over the internet. Please visit my website where we give away millions of dollars every day! CHEERS!

6 thoughts on “Coal Mine Canaries Plan Protest Over Working Conditions

  1. I have gone over to the dark side of the Force.
    Cheney and Halliburton forever!
    The Empire will strike back!!!

  2. If they don’t want to work then by God ship them down to the Gulf and use them to soak up oil! Show those little yeller bastards what real work is and to quit bitchin’!

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