Search Results for: isis
4 More Reasons Why You Should Join ISIS
A lot of people were offended by the recent Ten Great Reasons to Join ISIS article by Kilroy. I found myself at a bit of a loss to write an even edgier article. However, help is at hand! Notable Moderate…
Have You Ever Thought About Joining ISIS?
NOTE FROM WALLACE RUNNYMEDE: We rarely republish pieces at Glossy News, even though the ‘Glossy News Classics’ occasional series will feature some great work from our back catalogue. But this recent piece was so hilarious, we are publishing it again!…
Outrage: ISIS/ISIL/IS/Daesh Tabloid Rag Incensed by ‘Insulting’ Offer from ‘Greasy’ Tony Blair Faith Foundation ‘Charity’
• Blair’s chaplain confirms that former PM is ‘deeply wounded, not literally of course’ by the Islamist SNUB • Dafiq editorial staff refuse to comment Edgy ISIS/Daesh hipster black-top Dafiq has been hitting the headlines (and not just their own,…
Ten Great Reasons to Join ISIS!
Greetings and salutations dysfunctional Western youth. God is great and so are you! We are ISIS and we are looking for a few good martyrs! Are you that special person who is destined to do great things for a great…
US: ISIS Must Sign TTIP “Or Else…”
WASHINGTON – U.S. State Department spokesman Milo Minderbinder announced today that ISIS must sign the TTIP [Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership] treaty by year’s end “or else we will retaliate with extreme prejudice. All options are on the table!” “Terrorist…
Ben Carson: Episcopalians are Worse than ISIS
Ben Carson has recently made another epic Godwin fail. But who has had the dire misfortune of incurring his wrath this time? Fifa & ISIS. … Uh, sorry! … Episcopalians & ISIS. One is a thuggish gang of jackbooted religious…
Putin & ISIS: Tyranny’s Latest Flamboyant Supergroup
Universally beloved plastic pop enterprise X Factor has finally lost its shine. Yup! No-one ever believed this classic of early 21st century manufactured inanity would ever end up being discredited by a flamboyant and sexually doubting, um, sexually dubious former…
Gingrich Clarifies/Muddies ‘ISIS Contract’ Situation (2/2)
Last time, I explained to you how a conciliatory Newt Gingrich™ attempted to liberate America from a very clear and present danger. That’s right: the mortal peril of bigoted mudslingers holding firmly and dogmatically to merely one-sided and partisan views…
Gingrich Clarifies/Muddies ‘ISIS Contract’ Situation (1/2)
Bill Clinton has stuck his stiff neck above the parapet and wantonly defamed Newt Gingrich for his ISIS apologism. Don’t vote for this cynical, Mafiaesque “contract-killing” bastard, if he ever runs for office. Yeah, vote for someone really good, like…
FIFA Joins Forces with ISIS: “It’s a Perfect Match”
FIFA president Sepp Blatter insists that he’s not using a fake name, but he also swears his sworn alliance to ISIS is likewise legitimate. FIFA and ISIS. One is a ruthless, soulless dictatorship that destroys everything in its path and…