Posted in War Zone

CIA Hymnbook (IX): How Do I Love Greed

Guest post by Lisa Way. How do I love greed? Let me count the ways. I love greed to the depth and breadth and height My drones can reach, when I’m safe and out of sight.

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Posted in War Zone

Army Forgets Weapons, Loses War

The small European nation of Chevroni lost its war with the Middle Eastern nation Texico last Sunday after forgetting to bring the weapons. “It happens,” said Chevroni General Stephen Stanford. “We had them all ready to go, but then things…

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Posted in Religionism War Zone

CIA Hymnbook: Agnus Dei/Lamb of God.

So far, the CIA Hymnbook has covered many famous hymns; including Sanctus and Bendictus. And speaking of well-beloved Latin hymns, we now have the ‘Agnus Dei’ or ‘Lamb of God.’ If you’ve recently been reading The Satanic Bible or Necronomicon,…

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Posted in Politics War Zone

Little-Known Democrat Cover-Up Finally Unearthed: John Kerry Nuked the Onion!

A little known scandal from the Obama administration has recently surfaced: And it’s not an imaginary wiretap! (Or even a non-imaginary one).

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Posted in Books, Newspapers & Misc War Zone

Professor Smiggles Smugly Condemns Fallacious Conceits of Big Humanitarianism

Some recent comments about humanitarian heroism have failed to satisfy the ever-impossible-to-please satire news fixture, Pre-Senior-Professor-Guru-Emeritus Angus Lenn(on/in)vedanta Smiggles from the Social Constructionist String Theory Department in Bushmills Metaphysical College. Notable public figure and moderate political Tory-ist William Hague moans:

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Posted in Politics War Zone

NRA Puts Flag At Half Mast For AR-15 Cut In Half By Gun Owner

In a sense of tragic loss and deep empathy, NRA Headquarters and local affiliate branches have lowered their flags to half mast in honor of an AR-15 assault rifle that was horrifyingly cut in half and destroyed by its owner.

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