Archive | Religionism

Queen Prepares To Have Pope “Over For Tea”

Queen Prepares To Have Pope “Over For Tea”

PRAGUE, CZECH REPUBLIC — Barely had the Spray-Shine dried on his glittery new red pumps, than the newly incarnated Card. Ratziger, as Pope Benedict XVI used to be known to friends, began negotiations for a visit from the Holy See to the Queen of England and Her See. The final Is were dotted and Ts were crossed with the Pope finally agreeing to supply the Royal Tea. Continue Reading

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Dr. Rick Warren in Orbit with God

Dr. Rick Warren in Orbit with God

NASA Headquarters, Houston, TX –by BobZaguy Evangelical pastor Rick Warren has taken on the quest that will bring him into planetary orbit, the ultimate God-like experience. This is an attempt to orbit with the planets, hoping to replace Pluto, whose name is an alternate for Hades, the Greek god of the Underworld. Continue Reading

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Innovative Indonesia: One Sharia Step Forward – Two Humane Steps Back

Innovative Indonesia: One Sharia Step Forward – Two Humane Steps Back

In an all-out attempt to catch up with the 21st Century and their high-tech’ Occidental peers, the foot-dragging Muslim community of Sumatra’s basket case Aceh province seem to be stuck in the Islamic year of 1430 and have just taken a further step backwards into their barbaric past by unanimously approving a numpty Sharia law sentencing convicted adulterers to be stoned to death – with half bricks, cobbles or any other hefty lump of throwable geology. Continue Reading

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Common Purpose? – Dial 666

Common Purpose? – Dial 666

There are now legions of people in the UK cognisant that the planned Kaflaesque-Orwellian European Union Superstate – following the manipulated ratification of the Lisbon Treaty – is just a matter of time and not one of ‘what if’ but simply ‘when’. Continue Reading

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Cloak of Death Nets $1M at Sotheby’s Auction

Cloak of Death Nets $1M at Sotheby’s Auction

New York, NY – The New York office of Sotheby’s has disclosed that the original Cloak of Death, worn by Death himself, has been auctioned off for the amazing sum of $1M. The cloak was reportedly put up for auction by the heirs of one of the last surviving members of Hitler’s Third Reich, who wanted nothing to do with the cloak’s dark history. Continue Reading

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Chocolate Doomsday Cult Calls It Quits

Chocolate Doomsday Cult Calls It Quits

Doomsday cults are big business these days. The Death by Chocolate Cult sadly disbanded.
Phoenix, AZ – It was announced today that the doomsday cult calling itself Death by Chocolate has called it quits due to the fact that their original mission to eat themselves to death with chocolate has not quite gone as planned. Continue Reading

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Middle East Caught Harboring WWII-Era Nazi

Middle East Caught Harboring WWII-Era Nazi

Pope Benny, the all-new German Mark XVI model, has left Rome for a visit to the Middle East – the first tour of the holy places of Christendom by a Pope since Christianity lost Jerusalem to the great unwashed Islamic hordes of Saladin during the Crusades of the Middle Ages. Continue Reading

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God Answers McCain’s Prayers with Resounding “No”

God Answers McCain’s Prayers with Resounding “No”

God, highest imagined power in all the universe, perhaps best known as the creator of day and night, took a few minutes away from his daily chore of answering billions of prayers for wealth, fame and sexual partners to publicly address a persistent request from one of his most visible, though least faithful followers, John McCain. “No,” said God, with a chorus of angels in accompaniment. “I will not honor the requests of you or Sarah Palin. Sorry. I have bigger things to deal with and you should stop praying to me for this.” Continue Reading

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