Category: Society
Killer Biscuits Banned in EU Coffee Shops
The latest piece of asinine legislature to emerge from the EU’s Ministry for Wasting Time and Money in Brussels involves HSE risk assessments for every possible human function and endeavour – from brewing a cup of tea or coffee to…
Pensioner Crushed Under Pile of Old Tat
The body of an elderly shopaholic was found underneath piles of cut price car boot sales tat, chrome-plated bric-a-brac and other similar cheap materialistic crap and bling items – which crushed her to death, an inquest heard today at a…
Palin to Cook eBay Auction $63.5K Fundraiser Dinner
WASILLA, ALASKA — A woman defense contractor in Huntsville, Ala., won the “Dangerous” Dining with Sarah Palin eBay auction — her bid was $63,500. Auction details only allow the winning bidder to bring three friends to the dinner. Palin’s spokeswoman…
Ask Hank: Best Man Blues
Dear Hank, I just got snubbed for the “Best Man” spot in my best friend’s wedding. He promised it to me years ago, and then when he got engaged I reminded him I had the job. He laughed it off,…
Innovative Indonesia: One Sharia Step Forward – Two Humane Steps Back
In an all-out attempt to catch up with the 21st Century and their high-tech’ Occidental peers, the foot-dragging Muslim community of Sumatra’s basket case Aceh province seem to be stuck in the Islamic year of 1430 and have just taken…
Knackers to Knockers: Tranny Prisoner Wins Appeal
The refusal to move a pre-operative transsexual prisoner from a men’s jail to a women’s prison is a violation of her human rights, according to a High Court judge. Deputy Judge Fellatia Faggorotti quashed Justice Secretary Jack Straw’s decision to…
New Malpractice Defense Tactic: Doctors Told to Fess Up
Washington, D.C. – On the advice of their attorneys and malpractice insurance company executives, doctors are now stepping forward and admitting their mistakes, hoping that a sincere apology and a couple of bucks will make multi-million dollar malpractice and wrongful…
Human Guinea Pig Mutations Blamed on Sunny D’
A final sanitised report into a clinical trial of the experimental drug TGN 1412 at a Little Hampton clinic that left six men seriously mutated in March found the catastrophic adverse physical reactions they suffered were not due to errors…
Racist Row Revving Up, Four Sure to End Up on the Floor
A Smegmadale driver spent two nights in jail after being accused of the latest numpty-dumpty politically-incorrect crime of “revving his car in a racist manner”.
Karma: Riot Cops Gas Themselves
Eighteen trainee officers have suffered burns to the faces, gone blind and had their lungs permanently damaged during a CS gas spray training exercise for the Greater Manchester Police’s ‘Riot Plod Squad’. The rookie recruits – hired from the redundant…