Category: Society
Dems Cope w/ Mid-Term Electile Dysfunction – Viagra In Short Supply
Webster’s Dictionary recently added a new phrase that pretty much sums up the problems facing the Democratic Party today as the important mid-term elections roll ever closer. Eloquently said, the new phrase has captured the imagination of conservative pundits as…
Tea Party Slams “Elitist” D.C. Table Manners
Twin Dorks, NV (GlossyNews) — On the campaign trail with norbert b. snortwhistle. In a blistering attack on the “political elitism that is destroying America” Nevada Senate candidate and Tea Party favorite Sharron Angle slammed the “fancy table manners in…
Yale Outsources Entire Undergraduate College to Singapore
NEW HAVEN, CT In a move that some disgruntled faculty equate with a capitalistic effort to cut costs, Yale University will outsource its entire undergraduate educational system (collectively known as Yale College) to Singapore’s National University beginning Fall quarter 2013….
Young Boy’s Wish Granted; Becomes Oscar Meyer Weiner
Rogersville, TN – GlossyNews.com – Little Johnny Krebbs loved to sit around his rural Rogersville home like any other kid daydreaming and making wishes. He wished for a puppy. Other times he wished for a new bicycle, but it wasn’t…
Suicide Bomber Surprise – Few of 72 Virgins Young or Women
TEHRAN, Iran – Future suicide bombers around the globe woke up with a jolt today, when they realized they faced a surprising religious announcement from a leading Iranian cleric. No, it wasn’t the sound of their vests exploding, but it…
High School Senior 2 Gay 2 B Remembered
Posted by your South America correspondents, Maria and Consuela Lopez. Sex is a private matter, except for performance artists employed in the adult entertainment sector, who are generally really nice people. Except for Diane; she was a real bitch. Oh,…
Woman Gives Self Face Lift Using a Simple Hammer & Hand Mirror
At 52 years old and recently divorced, Hog Jaw’s own Elsie Piebottom was feeling the sags and wrinkles of years of an outdoor lifestyle. A face lift was her dream and she did inquire with several top-notch surgeons about a…
Rwandan General Killed Millions, Accepted Christ, Welcomed to Heaven
Due to what some non-theists like to call a “gaping hole in theism”, General Mbutu Ngariao, perhaps best known as the Rape General, third in command during the Rwandan genocide, has been able to eleventh-hour-apologize and slip his way into…
Newlywed Husband Uses Scripture to Write-Off Premature Performance
Jason Margwalter, or Talahasee, Florida, recently wed his highschool sweetheart. Since both of them had saved themselves for marriage, allegedly, they had high expectations for their wedding night. Not all went quite to plan, according to new bride Nichole, but…
Lost WWII Japanese Battalion Found Still Huddled in Trenches
Manila, Philippines – Back pay mathematics is going to be a real tough chore for the Japanese Army to estimate in the next few months. Especially for the 134 men who’ve been on continuous combat duty in the mountains of…